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    Default what makes someone interesting?

    what makes someone interesting? i'm trying to train myself to be more extroverted. and i'm trying to figure out what people find interesting. anyone have any ideas?

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    Default Re: what makes someone interesting?

    Quote Originally Posted by mike_INTJ
    what makes someone interesting? i'm trying to train myself to be more extroverted. and i'm trying to figure out what people find interesting. anyone have any ideas?
    People will not find you interesting unless you first find them interesting ... that is essentially it.

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    Very well put.
    Binary or dichotomous systems, although regulated by a principle, are among the most artificial arrangements that have ever been invented. -- William Swainson, A Treatise on the Geography and Classification of Animals (1835)

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    Default Re: what makes someone interesting?

    Quote Originally Posted by rmcnew
    Quote Originally Posted by mike_INTJ
    what makes someone interesting? i'm trying to train myself to be more extroverted. and i'm trying to figure out what people find interesting. anyone have any ideas?
    People will not find you interesting unless you first find them interesting ... that is essentially it.
    now how would one mimic finding someone interesting?

    or more so, what i'd like to do is to appear interesting at a distance with an "aura of interest". where a stranger would think i'm interesting - and not just weird. which is what i'm getting now. as far as i know.

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    Default Re: what makes someone interesting?

    Quote Originally Posted by mike_INTJ
    Quote Originally Posted by rmcnew
    Quote Originally Posted by mike_INTJ
    what makes someone interesting? i'm trying to train myself to be more extroverted. and i'm trying to figure out what people find interesting. anyone have any ideas?
    People will not find you interesting unless you first find them interesting ... that is essentially it.
    now how would one mimic finding someone interesting?

    or more so, what i'd like to do is to appear interesting at a distance with an "aura of interest". where a stranger would think i'm interesting - and not just weird. which is what i'm getting now. as far as i know.
    Well, you can find out what interests a person specifically, learn alot about those things, and then strike a conversation up about those specific things. Or, you can just shoot for the breeze by talking about something entertaining you've seen or done.

    Heck, that is what I do ... works for me.

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    And I probably should mention that I had gotten scores of friends in college from doing that, and lots of chicks interested in me as well.

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    Yeah, but you're ENTp. Your advice may seem self-evident and easy, but it is quite difficult to actually apply for some of us.
    Binary or dichotomous systems, although regulated by a principle, are among the most artificial arrangements that have ever been invented. -- William Swainson, A Treatise on the Geography and Classification of Animals (1835)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cone
    Yeah, but you're ENTp. Your advice may seem self-evident and easy, but it is quite difficult to actually apply for some of us.
    pretty much. it's hard to pretend you have an interest in something, when you don't. and if it's girl related, i feel it's wrong to pretend i like hearing how she got lipstick on sale. or the mighty shoe adventures.

    for now all i can be is funny buy goofy, be myself, but explain it to others in a way that i and they can understand. the main problem is, i'm not sure if i'm making myself look stupider, or if it's actually invoking any secret interests.

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    The most important thing about in with people is to treat them like they're important. And smile a lot. It may be easier for me because I'm a girl, but I find that people become interested in what I say when I smile. I do this a lot when dealing with clients or employees at businesses.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    The most important thing about in with people is to treat them like they're important. And smile a lot. It may be easier for me because I'm a girl, but I find that people become interested in what I say when I smile. I do this a lot when dealing with clients or employees at businesses.
    is it a toothy smile? or a lippy smile?

    i can smile with the lips ok, but teeth only show when i laugh. it hurts my face otherwise.

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    Become a valuable, independent person, which takes effort

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    Quote Originally Posted by mike_INTJ
    Quote Originally Posted by Cone
    Yeah, but you're ENTp. Your advice may seem self-evident and easy, but it is quite difficult to actually apply for some of us.
    pretty much. it's hard to pretend you have an interest in something, when you don't. and if it's girl related, i feel it's wrong to pretend i like hearing how she got lipstick on sale. or the mighty shoe adventures.

    for now all i can be is funny buy goofy, be myself, but explain it to others in a way that i and they can understand. the main problem is, i'm not sure if i'm making myself look stupider, or if it's actually invoking any secret interests.
    If you have to worry about looking stupid, that is the wrong attitude and you will just tool yourself over in the long run.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    The most important thing about in with people is to treat them like they're important. And smile a lot. It may be easier for me because I'm a girl, but I find that people become interested in what I say when I smile. I do this a lot when dealing with clients or employees at businesses.
    That's called emotional manipulation, joy ... I have done the same thing.

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    Don't act like someone you're not to attract someone. How long can you continue to act like that once you're together? How friggin exhausting. Be yourself, but he confident. Try to see the best in people, but stay sincere. There are a lot of people you're compatible with, so don't settle for the ones you're not.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    Don't act like someone you're not to attract someone. How long can you continue to act like that once you're together? How friggin exhausting. Be yourself, but he confident. Try to see the best in people, but stay sincere. There are a lot of people you're compatible with, so don't settle for the ones you're not.
    Actually [if that was directed at me], there really is not alot of people I would consider compatible with me, even people who are usually interested in me for who I am and not someone I am pretending to be. If I sense a girl might be superficial, shallow, or not the serious commital type ... I am not interested, period!

  16. #16
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    mike, i am a female but i don't like shoes and cosmetics stuffs at all. in a way, i'm in a worse situation than you because gals expect me to share the same interest.

    whenever they talk about subjects like that, i just patiently listen. i will ask why they do certain things and maybe comment on their statements; in a friendly way of course.

    and, you're a guy, so i think gals probably won't talk about the things you mentioned when you're around. even if they do, i'm sure they don't expect you to take part in the conversation. so just sit and listen. and of course, as suggested before, SMILE!!!!!

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