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Thread: Child's Play

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    Default Child's Play

    If you could pick your child's type what would it be? Why?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cyrano View Post
    If you could pick your child's type what would it be? Why?
    I would prefer in my quadra as I'd naturally give them what they needed more easily. Or semi-dual. It would be hard to do your absolute best as a parent, and, for instance to have a conflictor child. Because then I'd know what I naturally would do may harm or piss the poor kid off. . They'd need routine which I wouldn't naturally provide, etc. That could be hard on a kid, to not get what they need. Even if I tried to cater to an ISTj child, I would probably still fall short of say, the Fe for instance.

    I just would want everyone to get along and feel loved, etc. If I could pick, I would.

    But I have noticed that several of my friends that married within their quadra also had a child within their quadra. So maybe that happens?
    Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)

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    without the nose Cyrano's Avatar
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    I'm going ENFp. Also in my Quad. I think Extroverts have it easier in life, at least that's my view from the other side of the fence. I also admire The Intuition folks for their long-range view of things. I could go F or T, but since I have a daughter, I think F fits better, and finally I like people that keep an open mind and remain able to adapt. Fits my style better.
    Last edited by Cyrano; 08-26-2009 at 03:52 AM.
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    I think temperament is the hardest. I mean, when you're an EJ parent to an IP child, for instance.

    I get along and communicate best with my IP kids. I sometimes feel exasperated with my EJ kid. And I feel like she wishes I were more organized.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    It has to be a boy, it has to be SLE and he has to be better than me at everything ever. Sports, grades, girls, everything. If not I will disown him and try again. JWC4 Will win at life or I will make a new JWC4. End of story.
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    Quote Originally Posted by JWC3 View Post
    It has to be a boy, it has to be SLE and he has to be better than me at everything ever. Sports, grades, girls, everything. If not I will disown him and try again. JWC4 Will win at life or I will make a new JWC4. End of story.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cyrano View Post
    If you could pick your child's type what would it be? Why?
    Identical, because it's the best type although it leads to life of misery.
    ...the human race will disappear. Other races will appear and disappear in turn. The sky will become icy and void, pierced by the feeble light of half-dead stars. Which will also disappear. Everything will disappear. And what human beings do is just as free of sense as the free motion of elementary particles. Good, evil, morality, feelings? Pure 'Victorian fictions'.

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    Supervisee. Cause I'm a sadist like that.

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    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    LII-Ne with strong EII tendencies, 6w7-9w1-3w4 so/sp/sx, INxP



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    I would like to have three kids: 2 boys-SEE and ILI....and one IEI girl....

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    Quote Originally Posted by warrior-librarian View Post
    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    My sister (FiSe) and my dad (SeTi). Although I can't think of much to say, other than my sister gets money from my dad very easily, while he's usually stingy with it.
    ...the human race will disappear. Other races will appear and disappear in turn. The sky will become icy and void, pierced by the feeble light of half-dead stars. Which will also disappear. Everything will disappear. And what human beings do is just as free of sense as the free motion of elementary particles. Good, evil, morality, feelings? Pure 'Victorian fictions'.

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    Quote Originally Posted by warrior-librarian View Post
    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    My half-brother (ILE) and my father (LSI)

    My father seemed rather threatened by him, like when they would disagree my brother would generally "outwit" him in which my father would generally fight back with the typical childish rhetoric that supervisees tend to do.
    My brother would try to find some middle-ground to compromise, but that would make my father, being Ne PoLR, become even more irrational in his dealings with him, sort of that "My way or no way" type of responses.

    My IEE mother would always defend my brother and that didn't really help but made matters worse.

    Yah, so if anyone wants to question the validity of Socionics intertype relations, come meet my family
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    Quote Originally Posted by warrior-librarian View Post
    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    my daughter is IEI and husband is ESE so she supervises him. they argue a fair bit and my daughter rolls her eyes and it's hard for me to back him up sorta cause I almost always think she's right.
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    Quote Originally Posted by warrior-librarian View Post
    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    I supervise my mother. She used to always complain that I over-criticised her, but now we get along quite well because I bite my tongue a lot.

    I'd like dual or activity children, preferably alphas or betas, but I'm not sure I could handle a beta ST teenaged boy.
    Quote Originally Posted by Agee The Great View Post
    Nobody here...besides me, seems to know what SLE is except for maybe Maritsa.

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    Quote Originally Posted by octopuslove View Post
    I'd like dual or activity children, preferably alphas or betas, but I'm not sure I could handle a beta ST teenaged boy.
    I have an ESE friend with an SLE son going into 6th grade. He's a nationally-ranked wrestler and walks like a gansta. He was kicked out of school at the end of last year. He's a beautiful kid but aggressive and she cannot control him. Not sure what type her husband is.
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    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron View Post
    I have an ESE friend with an SLE son going into 6th grade. He's a nationally-ranked wrestler and walks like a gansta. He was kicked out of school at the end of last year. He's a beautiful kid but aggressive and she cannot control him. Not sure what type her husband is.
    I hear stories about my LSI friend's childhood, and I just pity his parents. Lots of drugs, throwing rocks at stuff, yelling things at teachers, underaged fence-jumping into festivals, passing out in the middle of the road after a bout of drinking... I'd imagine that an SLE would probably be worse, unless he's like my SLE friend who decided early on that he'd be AWESOME at school, but smashed the school's champion fighter in the face in his first week so he never got picked on.
    Quote Originally Posted by Agee The Great View Post
    Nobody here...besides me, seems to know what SLE is except for maybe Maritsa.

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    Quote Originally Posted by warrior-librarian View Post
    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    It may not be Supervision, but I think my Dad is my Beneficiary (ISTp).


    EDIT: And I do think that if I could choose, I would also like a child where I could provide for their Super-Id in some way, or have a connection of some kind in the Ego. As for Duals, if I maybe ended up marrying an ESE, I'm not sure what it'd be like to also have an ESE child! That house would be absolutely crazy...

    But, I do think it'd be neat to have siblings who were Duals/Activators under me, regardless of type. I'd definitely put that in somewhere.


    On another note, I'm waiting to try and get some observations on my two nieces (almost four and two). I don't have much data, but I think the oldest might have Ne, and possibly Ti. She could be ENTp, but it's just a far-off guess (even though her Mom would be ISFj!)

    The younger one could possibly be a Extraverted Feeler, but she's very touchy about her space recently.
    Last edited by Currere; 08-26-2009 at 02:43 PM.
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    supervision : My best friend ILI with his LSE father. He doesn't bother listening to what he says any more. He now considers his father like a difficult child (!) He sighs and says : Yes, that's my family (his mother is SEI I believe).

    Quote Originally Posted by Marie84 View Post
    My half-brother (ILE) and my father (LSI)

    My father seemed rather threatened by him, like when they would disagree my brother would generally "outwit" him in which my father would generally fight back with the typical childish rhetoric that supervisees tend to do.
    My brother would try to find some middle-ground to compromise, but that would make my father, being Ne PoLR, become even more irrational in his dealings with him, sort of that "My way or no way" type of responses.

    My IEE mother would always defend my brother and that didn't really help but made matters worse.

    Yah, so if anyone wants to question the validity of Socionics intertype relations, come meet my family
    Hum, tricky.

    I personnaly would go for : a dual, a miror, a business, or a beneficiary relationship with my children if I had the choice.
    In any case, I'd prefer a rational, like me.
    edit : I've forgotten, I'd love to have an iddentical child. But I'd get overly protective I guess.
    Last edited by Linalee; 08-26-2009 at 03:56 PM.

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    I'd like to have an ESE wife, ESE daughters and LII sons. That would make the male/female roles simple and obvious.

    Hmm... once I'd had one ESE and one LII, though, I'd probably go for an ILE (male) and an SEI (female). Get a whole quadra...

    Quote Originally Posted by warrior-librarian View Post
    Does anyone here know anyone where the kid is the supervisor and the parent is the supervisee relation-wise? How does that play out?
    Me and my dad, probably. He has quite a bit of respect for my intelligence - when I disagree with him, he usually starts to think that he's wrong. However, he often perceives me as challenging his authority as man of the house, which has made for some difficult situations - especially since my sister usually sides with me. As an additional dynamic, she'll side with our mother over me, and my mother usually sides with my dad in an unintrusive manner... so when they both get involved, they normally quiet the dispute without resolving it. When this happens, my dad gets time to think about it, and comes to me in a Feeler manner later, seeking to protect the relationship and leave the dispute behind us... to which I almost always agree.



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    Easy answer for me:

    If its a girl, I want her to be my dual. If its a guy, I want him to be my identical, thus being my wife's dual. In both circumstances, you have a perfect identical role model for your little boy or girl, having at least similar values, and your little boy/girl grows up thinking along the right track of who he/she should marry. Girls look at their father as the husband role model, and guys look at their mother as the wife role model.

    Basically what Brilliand is saying.

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    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    Easy answer for me:

    If its a girl, I want her to be my dual. If its a guy, I want him to be my identical, thus being my wife's dual. In both circumstances, you have a perfect identical role model for your little boy or girl, having at least similar values, and your little boy/girl grows up thinking along the right track of who he/she should marry. Girls look at their father as the husband role model, and guys look at their mother as the wife role model.
    that's actually a really good answer. I think slackermom has this--her daughter is her identical and her husband's dual.
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    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    Easy answer for me:

    If its a girl, I want her to be my dual. If its a guy, I want him to be my identical, thus being my wife's dual. In both circumstances, you have a perfect identical role model for your little boy or girl, having at least similar values, and your little boy/girl grows up thinking along the right track of who he/she should marry. Girls look at their father as the husband role model, and guys look at their mother as the wife role model.

    Basically what Brilliand is saying.
    Brilliant!
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    Now for the really controversial idea: Child-swapping to arrange ideal parent-child relationships!



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    wow, your parents are conflictors? How do they get along?

    Quote Originally Posted by Marie84 View Post
    My half-brother (ILE) and my father (LSI)

    My father seemed rather threatened by him, like when they would disagree my brother would generally "outwit" him in which my father would generally fight back with the typical childish rhetoric that supervisees tend to do.
    My brother would try to find some middle-ground to compromise, but that would make my father, being Ne PoLR, become even more irrational in his dealings with him, sort of that "My way or no way" type of responses.

    My IEE mother would always defend my brother and that didn't really help but made matters worse.

    Yah, so if anyone wants to question the validity of Socionics intertype relations, come meet my family
    Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)

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    Quote Originally Posted by jewels View Post
    wow, your parents are conflictors? How do they get along?
    Oh wow, you don't want to know. They're still married but not due to love, that's for sure.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marie84 View Post
    Oh wow, you don't want to know. They're still married but not due to love, that's for sure.
    hmm. I was curious if socionics would prove true in your parent's situation, and I guess it really does. That must have been a really stressful relationship. Sorry to hear that...being around so much tension I can only imagine would be tough.

    It makes me feel better that I've not pursued things w/ ISTJs though! I always wonder if conflictors can be happy together -- as some say any relationship can "work." But it just proves to me it really is true that the theory is helpful. I guess anything is possible w/ work, but then it's a lot of work, and why do that when other things...like duals are less work, more fun .
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    Quote Originally Posted by polikujm View Post
    Easy answer for me:

    If its a girl, I want her to be my dual. If its a guy, I want him to be my identical, thus being my wife's dual. In both circumstances, you have a perfect identical role model for your little boy or girl, having at least similar values, and your little boy/girl grows up thinking along the right track of who he/she should marry. Girls look at their father as the husband role model, and guys look at their mother as the wife role model.
    yeah this

    I'll corroborate it by saying that my dad is also ILE, and we get along great.

    I'd only pick a different (and presumably more interesting) answer so that I could just see what would happen

    Quote Originally Posted by jewels View Post
    wow, your parents are conflictors? How do they get along?
    Mine are, too.. ILE (again, my identical) and ESI. They're basically roommates who know that they're not right for each other but continue to stay married because it's convenient. In other words, they don't get along.

    This, of course, makes my mother and I conflictors, too. Having studied psychology, I've got the advantage that I understand why my mother and I conflict, so I can avoid it at times. We still have our tiffs now and then, but we don't have the same sort of horrible relationship that she and my dad do.

    Between me, my dad, my mom, and my ESE sister, my mom's the only one who's not alpha. She often feels misunderstood
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    Quote Originally Posted by greed View Post
    Mine are, too.. ILE (again, my identical) and ESI. They're basically roommates who know that they're not right for each other but continue to stay married because it's convenient. In other words, they don't get along.
    Exact same thing with my parents
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    Quote Originally Posted by jewels View Post
    hmm. I was curious if socionics would prove true in your parent's situation, and I guess it really does. That must have been a really stressful relationship. Sorry to hear that...being around so much tension I can only imagine would be tough.

    It makes me feel better that I've not pursued things w/ ISTJs though! I always wonder if conflictors can be happy together -- as some say any relationship can "work." But it just proves to me it really is true that the theory is helpful. I guess anything is possible w/ work, but then it's a lot of work, and why do that when other things...like duals are less work, more fun .
    From my point of view, watching them communicate is like listening to two people speak different, foreign, languages to one another. What one says doesn't "click" with the other, which turns into arguments.
    And arguing with an LSI is always futile
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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Supervisee. Cause I'm a sadist like that.
    you are a sadist dude.

    my two kids are my identity and activity, so they are within quadra and i'm very grateful for this. i feel effective as a parent. i've noticed something interesting though. my parents and siblings are delta, they always see the side of my ESE daughter and like her better. over the summer they picked on ILE who got pretty upset and needed my intervention.

    my ex husband's family is beta and they always see the side of the ILE and like her better. they pick on ESE, so she needs my help with that. i feel like i'm the one who sees both of them clearly and values them both for who they are.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Brilliand View Post
    Me and my dad, probably. He has quite a bit of respect for my intelligence - when I disagree with him, he usually starts to think that he's wrong. However, he often perceives me as challenging his authority as man of the house, which has made for some difficult situations - especially since my sister usually sides with me. As an additional dynamic, she'll side with our mother over me, and my mother usually sides with my dad in an unintrusive manner... so when they both get involved, they normally quiet the dispute without resolving it. When this happens, my dad gets time to think about it, and comes to me in a Feeler manner later, seeking to protect the relationship and leave the dispute behind us... to which I almost always agree.
    This sounds very Interesting, What type as your mother again? As sister you're referring as Director Abbie right?
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

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    1)
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    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    This sounds very Interesting, What type as your mother again?
    I think my mother is SLI.

    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    As sister you're referring as Director Abbie right?
    Yes.



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    Interesting question. I would probably want a combination of an INFJ son and daughter, or an ESTP son and ENFP daughter. Not sure if the first coupling makes sense, but this way I'll be able to understand them. In the case of the second, we'll have the benefit of the duality, which means they'll have my strengths and few of my weaknesses. I would want my kids to be tougher, much more independent at a younger age than I was, more assertive with a stronger sense of self, but still be sensitive and open, without compromising who they are as individuals. If I ever have kids, I just hope I don't screw them up too much.
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