******ry introspection

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

So Gilly's comment about me loving others made me think about something, that is like the EXACT missing ingredient in my life now that I think about it. Cause I always knew how to get loved, but I never really learned how to actually show my love for others. Or allow myself to feel what that's like much. If somebody like irl did something for me I always had a horrible time showing affection and appreciation, my ego always wanted to 'remain the victim' instead, out of self-preservation or something. If I realized I unconditionally loved somebody, I just kinda mumbled it under my breath (or I wrote shit in journals about it and I didn't show it in reality at all) when in reality it meant the world to me and I should have been more honest in my actions based on what I was really feeling inside.

But it doesn't mean that I still can't hate them sometimes or show favorites or be my play the victim self I just have to....kinda let go and show sweetness to them. The windows are breaking open and the mask is lifting, yaaay for discovering our true selves!

[Gilly]

Loving is infinitely better than being loved. Being loved is just a quick fix, something that inflates your ego for a week or two at best; loving changes you.

[sigma]

I never really learned how to actually show my love for others.

Research in the filed of positive psychology found that love correlates to the presence of aid, comfort and acceptance. So, to show your love find out what is alive in the other person, what are his needs, especially the needs that are not being met by other people. Help that person to the best of your abilities. Create an atmosphere of comfort tailored to that specific person and offer clear and specific gratitude for that person's actions.