Is it common for you guys to get reality checks, like believing that something is a certain way, only to be caught off guard later on at some point? I mean especially when it comes to knowing how you stand with someone else. For example, you might believe that a person can be trusted with something, only to be surprised when they act in a way that says otherwise. Or, you believe that you and someone else are closer than what you really are, and then a bomb gets dropped, and it's supposed to be "obvious" but for some reason you just couldn't see it... I've gotten better at keeping a distance to observe, but I keep falling for external actions as my way of determining how things are. I don't like to have to think about ulterior motives, or things that are just not apparent at a given time. I guess because of this I've gotten better at dealing with this kind of disappointment, and recognizing things that even though look a certain way, from experience they're not. I think it's also a matter of assuming things too much as well.
There's also something that I find strange, which is that whenever there is a situation where I'm assuming something is not like it really is, I always have a gut feeling that something's not right, but I just can't pinpoint what... So I ask myself if I should follow the gut feeling, even though it doesn't make much sense at the moment, or try to figure it out in a concrete way, which is what I always end up doing. I consider myself to be pretty good at knowing when something is "off," but rather bad at knowing what it is.