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Thread: What polr did I hit here?

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    Default What polr did I hit here?

    Recently I told a friend 'You have a vengeful spirit' and she flinched and looked upset, like a nerve was clearly hit. Maybe she was just upset that I criticized her, but she's tough regardless, so I think I hit some sort of polr there. I felt really bad afterwards, I didn't mean to inflict pain so I tried to quickly cover it up with a compliment.

    I notice I do that a lot in social situations. I'll surprisingly insult people. =/ It's really no wonder why I haven't had many friends over the years, well that and my ability to mistake teasing for something insulting when I don't wanna be bothered/not in the mood.

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    ILE - ENTp 1981slater's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Recently I told a friend 'You have a vengeful spirit' and she flinched and looked upset, like a nerve was clearly hit. Maybe she was just upset that I criticized her, but she's tough regardless, so I think I hit some sort of polr there. I felt really bad afterwards, I didn't mean to inflict pain so I tried to quickly cover it up with a compliment.

    I notice I do that a lot in social situations. I'll surprisingly insult people. =/ It's really no wonder why I haven't had many friends over the years, well that and my ability to mistake teasing for something insulting when I don't wanna be bothered/not in the mood.
    hard to tell....perhaps you hit
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    Yeah she took what I said really seriously. It's possible she's SLE I suppose.

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    I'd laugh if someone said that to me. I doubt she's Fi PoLR.

    She could just be really sensitive.

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    Ezra, your faux bad-boy image is so 1998.

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    I don't think producing functions can really cause PoLR hits.

    By that, you would've hit a Si or a Ni PoLR.

    You didn't point out how she was straining herself or others, so...

    Ni PoLR.

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    What situation did it come out of? Why were you telling her she had a vengeful spirit?

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Recently I told a friend 'You have a vengeful spirit' and she flinched and looked upset, like a nerve was clearly hit. Maybe she was just upset that I criticized her, but she's tough regardless, so I think I hit some sort of polr there. I felt really bad afterwards, I didn't mean to inflict pain so I tried to quickly cover it up with a compliment.

    I notice I do that a lot in social situations. I'll surprisingly insult people. =/ It's really no wonder why I haven't had many friends over the years, well that and my ability to mistake teasing for something insulting when I don't wanna be bothered/not in the mood.
    I think I've read somewhere before (and I can't remember where) that the qualities people hate the most in others are the negative qualities that are more predominant in themselves, and when you call them on these things it tends to anger them or hurt them the most (I thought about it and found that this is actually true in my case!). So, maybe what you said hit home for her or something.
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    That seems to be the very definition of projection.
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    Okay, who wants to be told "You have a vengeful spirit"? Is that considered a compliment somewhere? I would think it would hurt many people, regardless of whether it's a polr hit.
    IEE

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    I think her mother probably told her she had a vengeful spirit after she locked her dog in the garage to punish it for barking too much and it died of heat stroke, so now she's really sensitive about that word.. just don't use it again
    INTp

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    Quote Originally Posted by crazedratXII View Post
    I think her mother probably told her she had a vengeful spirit after she locked her dog in the garage to punish it for barking too much and it died of heat stroke, so now she's really sensitive about that word.. just don't use it again
    No, it obviously hit her PoLR, there are no other conclusions. It is obvious.

    But seriously, I don't think that a potential PoLR hit is something like "You are really bad at math" or "You have a really bad breath", but rather, more like you know... it's about the "information elements". I don't exactly know what that means, because I don't claim to know what a PoLR hit exactly is.
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    "You have a vengeful spirit" seems like a pretty shitt thing to say. I'm quite unsurprised that somebody was offended.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Singularity View Post
    No, it obviously hit her PoLR, there are no other conclusions. It is obvious.

    But seriously, I don't think that a potential PoLR hit is something like "You are really bad at math" or "You have a really bad breath", but rather, more like you know... it's about the "information elements". I don't exactly know what that means, because I don't claim to know what a PoLR hit exactly is.
    I have to agree in the sense that a "PoLR hit" has to do with using a function. As people have said, no one wants to be called a "vengeful spirit" no matter who they are, and some people are more sensitive than others. Her reaction has little to do with her PoLR, because it was just words. It'd have to be the use of a function that would actually hit her PoLR, like using or throughout an argument that only made things worse since they don't value the use of that function.

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    I don't think it was a polr hit. Maybe she is just sensitive in general or she might actually think that of herself (or been told by other people) and so it hit home. The question I would ask is why did you call her that?
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    Fe I would say.

    Edit:Actually that would be Te, since the criticism is basically saying shes Fe

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    You don't understand. She's a tough person. I said a lot of things before just joking around and giving her advice and she didn't take offense. But for some reason when I said THIS one thing she got all upset, like suddenly it surprised her. It was like some sort of instinctive 'flinch' that she did. It's not somebody who I ever would consider thinking I had to disguise the truth in any way. She normally respects me when I'm blunt.

    That's what made me think I hit some sort of achilles' heel thing (Your natural weakness that you can't ever overcome.)

    Oh well I overthink things. She was probably just uncharacteristically sensitive that day.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    I think I've read somewhere before (and I can't remember where) that the qualities people hate the most in others are the negative qualities that are more predominant in themselves, and when you call them on these things it tends to anger them or hurt them the most (I thought about it and found that this is actually true in my case!). So, maybe what you said hit home for her or something.
    What you are saying is that people hate others who is using Their Polr function?
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    Quote Originally Posted by 07490 View Post
    What you are saying is that people hate others who is using Their Polr function?
    Idk, I don't think it had much to do with PoLR? I think what Mimosa Pudica said about complexes was interesting.
    Quote Originally Posted by jxrtes View Post
    betas should be kept in zoos for children to stare and throw pop corn at.

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