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Thread: Why forum communication sucks

  1. #1
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    Default Why forum communication sucks

    You tell me a situation that happened to you in real life, from your subjective perspective. I have to take everything you say as face value and have absolutely no idea how much of the story you are fabricating, because it's all so general.

    You all go 'well she was using ti and so that means I rounded the lower case Fe to my fi interjecting the base perimeter of mental masturbation index section code 5 paragraph 7: SHUT UP. then blah blah' with no really proof, as you don't describe the precise physical experience enough (insanely neurotic), or even what the situation exactly was about in the first place. But doing that takes effort, of course, and you might realize that you were incorrect, and were analyzing the situation too much like a dork. Or maybe your just saving face due to wanting to stay anonymous. But it's hard to get a feel for a situation when you describe things so poorly and with the lack of concrete nouns and verbs.

    You simply leap to conclusions too much, forming answers that may not be there (because your brain asked such a fucked up question to begin with before overly-analyzing and categorizing this person so you could side-step away from your own guilt.), and you connect the dots in places where no dots could possibly be connected. That's not a way to get to know what somebody is about, what makes them tick. That's a way to further distance yourself from people so you don't have to deal with them. Maybe you just don't like them. Well then why analyze them at all? Can't you just use generic social skills and not talk with them on any sort of deeper level? What's wrong with assertively saying 'I'd rather not talk about that subject' if they attempt to get closer?

    Why not just be like my dual and say 'I just don't like you. Get the fuck outta my face.' =/ Why go through this pansy-ass fake psychoanalyzing bullshit that kinda makes people feel strange.

    I'm tired of analyzing people. We all have to do it, I'm aware of that. But going on and on and milking some small shit that happened to you in real life that ultimately meant nothing is just... crappy, sociopathic behavior IMO. From their perspective maybe you were really more of the asshole, and how do we judge your value and authenticity on that? Are you really looking at yourself as much as you claim to be looking at others?

    So therefore when I see hand-me down Ni being used, I can only kinda nod my head and go 'uh-huh' because really what else is there to contribute? I have no idea if what you're saying has much validity at all to it, because you're mentally scrutinizing others instead of just, talking to them directly and getting to them in an organic way. But if you can't, if it's some overly structured bullshit academia or co-worker setting, then maybe you have to resort to your perceptions as you're still too self-conscious to ask them out for a game of pool or for a cup of coffee. And maybe it's because I have Ni-ego, but I kinda get that your hunches about somebody are really half-baked and annoying.

    Then again you're just telling me a snap shot of your total relationship with this person, just venting on some sort of mishap quirk you both shared that was mentally unsettling for you. I can relate. But you just had a disconnect, a synapses misfiring that caused you to flinch and desperately try to struggle for an answer, a category, a mental understanding where none may truly be available. Try not to feel people in your head so much, try to feel them in your gut. Disconnecting from humans is uncomfortable, but it's going to happen to you constantly, but you don't have to analyze things to the ground where nothing makes any sense anymore. They're not worth the effort to be boxed in to understand the relationship. Just do the best you can and move on. Lots of people with shit-as-hell social skills can do wonderful in their jobs so why does it matter? Just.. keep trying to connect with who you can, and don't worry about the rest...

    I understand that's putting a pretty bow on things again but I'm just tired of it.

  2. #2
    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    I only lie about things such as whether or not there's a toucan choking on a coconut sitting in your left sock. There is, by the way.

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  3. #3
    Creepy-Cyclops

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    I don't know much about all this gay stuff bullets and doves, but it doesn't bother me. Post it as much as you want I say.

    I'm tired of analyzing people. We all have to do it, I'm aware of that. But going on and on and milking some small shit that happened to you in real life that ultimately meant nothing is just... crappy, sociopathic behavior IMO. From their perspective maybe you were really more of the asshole, and how do we judge your value and authenticity on that? Are you really looking at yourself as much as you claim to be looking at others?
    I hardly ever talk about what's going on in my life. It seems I'm the opposite. Maybe I should do it more.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    You tell me a situation that happened to you in real life, from your subjective perspective. I have to take everything you say as face value and have absolutely no idea how much of the story you are fabricating, because it's all so general.
    Yup. That's the essence of it.

  5. #5
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    You pit me in this position where you obviously want some understanding from an outside source. But without telling me any details, what exactly happened in any form of concrete way, then of course I'm forced to take your side, because what- I'm gonna play the asshole and try to be 'right', risk losing a potential partnership I could have with you, when I don't know what you're talking about? You can't get in somebody else's head, but if you want somebody in 'all sides' of the story, you have to start describing the *whole* situation and all its environmental stimuli as accurately as possible.

    You'd be surprised at how much the hair color or -or the height, or the ambiance of the room (its color, smell?) might have been effecting your judgement on this person. Has it been going on for years, or just recently? Has there ever been a time when you two bonded really well, when they stuck up for you? etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. What was this person's exact body language when communicating with you? I want to actually BE in the scene with you as much as possible before I knew what went down.

    If you truly wanted help, then that's how you get it. But then, you start to lose any form of pretense and anonymity, your shell melts away, your social mask begins dissolving completely, we really SEE you, and maybe that is the scary part.

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