Not identifying with Identicals in typing

[diljs]

I think there was one other IEE I knew growing up, but our friend circles were different so I didn't hang around him at all. Hm. I'm kind of used to being the only IEE around. I'm not sure where the rest are hiding.

I know a group of 3-4 IEEs that hang out regularly. They're fun. More fun if you've got some Te to balance them out, their erratic behaviors stress me out.

[Jarno]

By "associate" do you mean hang out with or identify with? I'm guessing you mean more the latter, in which case I think I might agree with you. Although, I do like comparing myself with others of my type because I happen to enjoy noticing individual differences. I think, in any case, that whether one relates to one's supposed identicals or not should only be a part of the evaluative process.

Thanks, clear answer.

[Minde]

Thanks, clear answer.

lol, you're welcome.

It's kind of funny, actually, to see how many people can't/don't read (i.e. pretty much everybody in this thread). It seems most just read the topic title and then assume they know what the OP is about.

I guess it's a lesson in communication psychology.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

I agree, ethical identicals have a lot more compatibility than logical identicals. For example, seeing two LIIs in a room would just be *very* weird and awkward. They're the type that needs an opposite definitely.

However, I've always been able to be compatible with other IEIs. This also has to do with my enneagram type as well, similarities comfort 6s.

[diljs]

Identicals are boring, usually. Too stand-offish and hard to get to know. We're identicals, after all.

I'd kind of like to romance an identical.

[Minde]

Seriously, did anybody get Jarno's OP other than me? Anybody?

Not that it's bad to let conversations take different courses, and most of what's in this thread is interesting and potentially useful. But did anybody actually understand and react to his original thought?

Because - in case you didn't realize this - whether or not you like to hang out with your identicals was not the question.

[redbaron]

I don't mind associating myself with stereotypes of my type. I mean I guess I realize there are healthy and unhealthy versions of every type. Some of the stereotypes fit, some are over the top, I guess I just figure any intelligent person is going to get to know me as an individual and not automatically think "she must be this way because she's IEI".

[Wynch]

When I hang out with other ILEs it usually perpetuates a bit of a gong show. Off-the-wall loonies.

It's never good to be not Ti-ILE playing strategy games with us because we get hyper-analytical and have to break down everything that happens and all possible alternatives to what did and could have happened. We seem to find it fun and a necessary part of improving our game-play, but most other people seem to get annoyed.

[redbaron]

When I hang out with other ILEs it usually perpetuates a bit of a gong show. Off-the-wall loonies.

It's never good to be not Ti-ILE playing strategy games with us because we get hyper-analytical and have to break down everything that happens and all possible alternatives to what did and could have happened. We seem to find it fun and a necessary part of improving our game-play, but most other people seem to get annoyed.

sounds like a riot, actually. I would enjoy that. For awhile anyway. I suppose eventually it would make me tired.

[Brilliand]

Seriously, did anybody get Jarno's OP other than me? Anybody?

Thank you, you reminded me to actually read the OP! And my answer is 'yes', in both senses. Although I'd prefer hanging out with ESEs, I like to both relate to and hang out with LIIs. I've often compared myself with Descartes, and I've had quite a few nice discussions with people similar to me - at least some of who had to be LIIs.

[Creepy-male]

When I hang out with other ILEs it usually perpetuates a bit of a gong show. Off-the-wall loonies.

It's never good to be not Ti-ILE playing strategy games with us because we get hyper-analytical and have to break down everything that happens and all possible alternatives to what did and could have happened. We seem to find it fun and a necessary part of improving our game-play, but most other people seem to get annoyed.

Isn't that being tapped though?

Also, hell yes to being ILE! We've got Einstein and David Deutsch!

[Minde]

I don't mind associating myself with stereotypes of my type. I mean I guess I realize there are healthy and unhealthy versions of every type. Some of the stereotypes fit, some are over the top, I guess I just figure any intelligent person is going to get to know me as an individual and not automatically think "she must be this way because she's IEI".

Yay

Thank you, you reminded me to actually read the OP! And my answer is 'yes', in both senses.

That's good...

Although I'd prefer hanging out with ESEs, I like to both relate to and hang out with LIIs. I've often compared myself with Descartes, and I've had quite a few nice discussions with people similar to me - at least some of who had to be LIIs.

Ok...

Do you use how you relate or compare to other LIIs as a way to determine or measure your own typing? Or, to put it another way, if another LII acts much differently than you in some ways, does that make you doubt your own type? (I'm here rephrasing part of what I understand to be Jarno's idea.)

[Brilliand]

Do you use how you relate or compare to other LIIs as a way to determine or measure your own typing? Or, to put it another way, if another LII acts much differently than you in some ways, does that make you doubt your own type? (I'm here rephrasing part of what I understand to be Jarno's idea.)

I don't often type people definitely, so the LIIs that aren't similar to me just end up in my "I don't know" list.

[Park]

Do you like to associate yourself with people of your type?

Yeah, I do.

[07490]

I generally enjoy being with most ENFj-NI but theres differences, different belief, enviornment, goal and subtypes all changes BUt all in all we share this "let the guard down" feeling where we are not pressure so much in social situation to do certains things.

[redbaron]

it comes down to the definition of the word "associate" I think. Jarno may have meant "affiliated with" and others may have took the word to mean "keep company with", both of which are accurate definitions.

[Jarno]

it comes down to the definition of the word "associate" I think. Jarno may have meant "affiliated with" and others may have took the word to mean "keep company with", both of which are accurate definitions.

exactly.

It seems that some people look at other persons with whom they share the same type and they start to think, hey, that's not how I am, or how I want to be, or want to be associated with. As in associations.

[xyz]

I don't like associating myself with other beaners. They're too brown.

[iAnnAu]

exactly.

It seems that some people look at other persons with whom they share the same type and they start to think, hey, that's not how I am, or how I want to be, or want to be associated with. As in associations.

Hm. Well, I notice things I have in common with others, and of course I notice differences, but usually in the context of enjoying such traits. When I catch myself disliking something in another person, I'm more likely to think "This is not what I want to hang around" rather than confuse it with something in myself. Doubtlessly some of those times have been hypocritical, but my point is that I don't see my associations as predicated on how I "identify" with others, but rather how well I enjoy their company, or how easily I get things done with them.

To clarify, I have definitely felt myself caught in a situation where I thought "I do NOT want to be associated with this person." However, I didn't think that my change in opinion of that person's character meant that I was mistaken about something within myself.

... still not sure I'm explaining that clearly. Do you get what I mean? If not, I can try to explain it another way.

[betterthan]

Gosh. I am loving this IEI friend of mine, he's a peach. Great for self-development; I can check out my potential in some areas and check I am not sucking out in the ways he is. In groups, we just kind of go into our own little bubble and hang there together, talking about whatever we want to .

The only issue I have is that he MOANS and over thinks and gets down on himself when he is awesome . Argh, but I guess that's not type related.

I have also known two other IEIs, got along very well with one of them and the other got on well with, she's sweet and he quite liked each other but she wasn't as interesting to me as the others.

So hell yeah for identicals, as long as they are interesting and not unhealthy; but that pretty much goes for everyone!

[ragnar]

Do you like to associate yourself with people of your type?

Evidently not, in practice. Almost all of my close associations - if I can be said to have any - are with betas or deltas. Gammas are the least represented quadra.