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Thread: Which relation makes the best living situation?

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    Default Which relation makes the best living situation?

    I'm sure duality tops the list, but I'm curious about what types/relations you have lived with [including parents, siblings, roommates, significant others, etc.] and how it went. Stories are welcome.

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    Ritella's Avatar
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    Supervision is the worst.

    SEE: pick up your shit.
    SEE: PICK UP YOUR SHIT.
    ME: wha?
    EII; E6(w5)

    i am flakey

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    The only types I haven't lived with are ILE and ESE (kindred and request). Maybe I'll write more about my specific experiences at some point, but they were basically right along socionic lines.
    It is easier for the eye of a camel to pass through a rich man than for a needle to enter the kingdom of heaven.

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    Creepy-Cyclops

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    Something important to remember: Socionics can only explain how the relationship works, it doesn't tell you how much personal value you should attach to it. For instance, you could live with your supervisor who may be knowledgable about things you want to learn about or be into similar hobbies as you so it is a good person to know and get involved in your hobbies with.

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    I can tell you which are the worst, it will be faster to write this shit.
    -Contrary
    -Conflict
    -Super-ego
    -Supervision - especially when I am supervisee
    in this order

    Other relations are much, much better.

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    Identical. Not dual, actually.

    Identical is the best because... you like each other , but you won't cover up each other's weaknesses in a way where the other becomes a vegetative state. (Which like what I previously said in another post, can happen if you're living in a rather safe situation where you don't need to be protected as much.) So you both can improve and appreciate one another, while still improving yourself. It won't have the raw chemistry of duals, but it will have ... comfort? And ease and understanding, which is sooo important when living with somebody.

    I think this question depends on the age and/or life experience of the individual.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Identical. Not dual, actually.

    Identical is the best because... you like each other , but you won't cover up each other's weaknesses in a way where the other becomes a vegetative state. (Which like what I previously said in another post, can happen if you're living in a rather safe situation where you don't need to be protected as much.) So you both can improve and appreciate one another, while still improving yourself. It won't have the raw chemistry of duals, but it will have ... comfort? And ease and understanding, which is sooo important when living with somebody.

    I think this question depends on the age and/or life experience of the individual.
    When duals are good, and the stage of building a relationship is set, I think the elations overwhelms the understanding of an identical relationship.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    There's still elation and chemistry in Identical, it's just obvious subtle and less diluted/not as strong. But I agree, I guess.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Identical. Not dual, actually.

    Identical is the best because... you like each other , but you won't cover up each other's weaknesses in a way where the other becomes a vegetative state. (Which like what I previously said in another post, can happen if you're living in a rather safe situation where you don't need to be protected as much.) So you both can improve and appreciate one another, while still improving yourself. It won't have the raw chemistry of duals, but it will have ... comfort? And ease and understanding, which is sooo important when living with somebody.

    I think this question depends on the age and/or life experience of the individual.
    I'm currently living with a semi-dual and an identical. I love and appreciate my semi-dual. I'm silently planning to drug my identical, tie him naked to a post outside, paint a bulls-eye on his testicles, and provide passerbys and passing drivers with a variety of stones, rocks, paintballs, snow balls, pine cones, etc. to hurl at my identical. I wonder if he is planning something similar.

    I find that identicals do not even acknowledge each others weaknesses, not just that they do not help alleviate them. When they do acknowledge them, neither partner knows how to easily deal with the weaknesses or particularly wants to bother with them. On the other hand, I wish my semi-dual would effectively take over my life as he is really good at my PoLR, but does not extend himself into my zone.
    Surtout, pas trop de zle.

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    Living with my dual (room mates in college dorm) was the best year of my life. I've talked about it before, but I can't do it justice. I've never had a relationship that was that close, that smooth, or that intimate. She lives in her own apartment now and I live with a bunch of guys, but we sometimes joke that we should just move back in together in her apartment.

    Generally my experiences with Dual and Activity have been pretty awesome. Contrary hasn't been too bad. Conflictor is just annoying, I seriously want to bash his face in at times, but I restrain myself. Kindred is ok, not too much to report there. He cracks me up a lot, but other than that, we have a pretty neutral relationship. Quasi-Identical and I get along very comfortably. Then again we don't talk all that much, lol. Semi-dual was great until I stopped living with her (wtf?).
    ILE
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    Very busy with work. Only kind of around.

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    Eh.

    It's more complex than what we're making it. I don't mind my Identical. I think extroverted Identicals might annoy each other more than introverted identicals. What your describing doesn't sound very identical-ish to me. You might not like him/her for non-socionics reasons?

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    I think it totally depends on the person. I'm MARRIED to my supervisee and we get along great Seriously though. Let's see...

    I've lived with SEE--semi-dual (that was fabulous!)
    EIE--mirror (fun some of the time but we needed our individual space)
    SEI -- lookalike (GREAT!)
    another SEE--also very fun

    and that's about it. I've never lived with an identical or a dual.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    It's more complex than what we're making it. I don't mind my Identical. I think extroverted Identicals might annoy each other more than introverted identicals. What your describing doesn't sound very identical-ish to me. You might not like him/her for non-socionics reasons?
    Identicals tend to see each other as fulfilling the same role. Tension usually arises when one of the partners no longer wants to share that role (funny thought, but quasi-identities may not suffer from this as each does not see the other as inferior and hence harmless). In my case, I want to throttle my identical due to non-socionics conditions combined with one weakness that I exhibit on a regular basis. You could say his weakness popped up at an inopportune moment, left me hanging while handling all his affairs, and was something that I could not address with him (mostly because he vanished for 72 hours). Needless to say, I was and still am quite pissed at him.
    Surtout, pas trop de zle.

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    I have to end this conversation because it's getting a bit too psychological and like, too in my head and I can't really truly relate to what anybody is saying, that's why I hate forum conversation.

    That particular situation, if I TRULY knew all the details- seems to have little to do with psychological compatibility to be honest.

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    To be honest, the core of the problem is not being able to take care of each others weaknesses (or support each others strengths and interests, now that I think about it). If I had been my dual, I would have been better able to deal with his behavior and shock him out of his untimely rut. Currently, he is probably not even aware there was a problem. We have similar interests, but if one of us needs the support or the criticism of the other (usually him as I am much more self-sufficient), it can only be provided in a superficial manner. The only benefit to me telling him what he is already aware of is that I act like a cheerleader for him.
    Surtout, pas trop de zle.

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    But why would you need weaknesses covered up in a LIVING situation? You're completely safe (assuming enough financial security)! You only need somebody to cover up a weakness when a real external threat is present IMO.

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    I never said "covered up". The weaknesses need to be dealt with. This does not happen in identity relations because neither partner knows how to efficiently deal with them.
    Surtout, pas trop de zle.

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    That's bullshit. Real life evidence trumphs that garbage. My IEI grandmother dealt with tons of weaknesses in myself, having already been there.

    You assume just because two people are identicals that means they lived the exact same life and are on the same page. That is NONSENSE. No two people are like that, even if they are identicals. Everybody has had their own experiences etc.

    Facts just aren't on your side. Your Ni also seems quite weak, no offense.

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    So far I've never lived with my dual, but I got along great with my mirror when we lived together. I've lived with 3 quasis - not a good combination. I lived with an LIE and an ESI... That wasn't bad.
    IEE

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    I like mirror.
    At the moment I'm living with my dual but it's not the same. He always wants me to go out and do something and I usually don't because the activities available are expensive and involve doing something. Living with an ENFj was cool because even when he wanted to do something he wouldn't bother trying to get me to do it, he would just make something (people, games, books, you name it) magically appear in the house.

    I think the effect of type is kind of limited in choosing a roomate. In the sense that in a person of the same gender it's better they have have similar strengths and weaknesses as you so neither of you have to depend on the other, and because neither of you are depending on each other relations can remain casual and non-offensive.

    Also living with two other people was, in my opinion, MUCH better than living with one other person.
    INFp-Ni

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    #1 rule of in-house relations: separation along quadra lines *will* occur.

    More generally, if you're living with someone the relationship will be "played-out" in a more obvious and faster way than it would otherwise. This is why I've only written Wikisocion descriptions on relationships I've experienced with immediate family (with the exception of mirror).

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