IEE-SEE Business/Look-alike relations (ENFp & ESFp)

[Kim]

Tell me where you see the potential benefits as well as problems in romantic relationships between ENFp and ESFp. I have already gotten some very interesting input on this, but perhaps someone can contribute?

[meatburger]

My ESFp ex was very fun to be with and very warm to me. Fireworks in bed for sure. I didn't feel annoyed by her very often. I liked her a lot and kind of wished it could work out.

The problems arose because we eventually got tired of having to prove each other via Fi that we liked each other. She would flirt a lot with other guys and wear very skimpy clothes and i wasn't a fan of that. It just kind of fizzled out in the end. You are both bad at similar things and you are also sometimes competing for attention of people and groups too. ESFp's need the INTp rock and without it they can do some pretty crazy stuff lol. With my socionics knowledge i was constantly realising where she was asking for Te and how an INTp would be better for her.

Good for a fling or summer romance but thats about it

[jewels]

I was w/ an ESFp for about 4 years. It was a good serious relationship and actually, there wasn't any of that "flirty" ESFp stuff. He was very loyal. Our goals/life dreams just weren't in the same direction at all and he wanted a more typical stay home type girl. If it wasn't for that I think that pair can work out fine.

[Kim]

Thank you both! I want to hear more about those relationships. Where did things go well and where did you have to work harder on making it work?

[jewels]

well, it's of course difficult to separate the type from the people involved But, we weren't competitive and did understand each other (LOTS of Fi and loyalty, etc). We were both inclined to be jealous, so we avoided doing things that would piss each other off. We liked a lot of the same things and had a lot of fun. One on one we had more introvert type conversations and we'd both calm down more vs. doing the EP high energy thing like in public.

He did hate hearing about theory/personality types, but I talked about it anyway. He would complain, but I don't think minded all that much.

He liked to cook, but neither of us liked to clean. He did talk a lot at social gatherings which kind of forced me to be quieter. I didn't mind it at the time (as I was shy anyway), but I did become much louder after we broke up.

I still think if your goals are in line and you're similar it could work. We rarely fought.