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Thread: EIE and IEE/SEE relationship rant

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    Default EIE and IEE/SEE relationship rant

    This is not a thread against Delta's. I'm just ranting about this one ENFp....

    So there was this ENFp who was totally obsessed with me. He proclaimed his love for me after only knowing me for 3 months. I wasn't even friends with him. He befriended all of my friends and started hanging out at the student center to try to get with me. After a while I got fed up and said yes because everyone I know was bothering me about.
    I ended it four hours later over MSN. We tried to become good friends after that. We both used to talk on the phone, and online for hours, and it was fun. It worked well for a few months and one day he calls me out of the blue saying" I love you. We're meant to be. You just don't see that yet."
    I thought he was going crazy so I ignored him. After a while I started talking to him and everything was going fine up until recently when he got with his new girlfriend. I asked him if he can hang out and he said I had to "declare whether I was his friend or not" WTF...who does that? So I tried to be friendly the other day and he said "I'm going to be clear. I never don't want to see, speak, or hear from you again."
    Like who the hell does he think he is. It really bothers me that we were good friends but he ditched me. He has no right to do that. And no one I ever met wanted me to state whether we were friends or not. Seriously there is is no loyalty. I need more BETAS..ARGGGHHH

    Again I love most Deltas. Just not this one
    Last edited by idealistichick; 11-21-2008 at 03:05 AM.
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
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    You need more IJ.
    Posts I wrote in the past contain less nuance.
    If you're in this forum to learn something, be careful. Lots of misplaced toxicity.

    ~an extraverted consciousness is unable to believe in invisible forces.
    ~a certain mysterious power that may prove terribly fascinating to the extraverted man, for it touches his unconscious.

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    he's probably gay. move on.

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    ENFp laugh out Loud
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    he's not gay hehe...I'm just upset to be close to someone only to have them turn their back on you...
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    he said I had to "declare whether I was his friend or not"
    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    So I tried to be friendly the other day and he said "I'm going to be clear. I never don't want to see, speak, or hear from you again."
    Out of everything that happened, these two things sadden me the most that he actually said these.
    INFj

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    Quote Originally Posted by tereg View Post
    Out of everything that happened, these two things sadden me the most that he actually said these.

    yeah I'm really upset by those two the most. I'm really upset by it but I try not to show it so I laugh it off with friends. But the second comment is really ridiculous. The last time we talked we were just trying to figure things out. I'm deeply hurt by it and he proved my trust issues to be true...
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    he's not gay hehe...I'm just upset to be close to someone only to have them turn their back on you...
    *turns back*

    I'm always turning my back on people.

    What's the big deal?

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    Really horrible back acne?

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    Quote Originally Posted by tereg View Post
    Out of everything that happened, these two things sadden me the most that he actually said these.
    I agree! He sounds like a jerk. Also, for him to confess his love one moment and then say such mean things the next? How immature of him. The ENFp guys I've known can run hot and cold, but they wouldn't act like that. In fact, they seemed more afraid of conflict than anything. He seems like he was really afraid of being hurt and so went on the offensive...which is not very nice, or very mature.

    Then again, while some ENFp guys can be very committed (I knew one in a long-term relationship who was very loyal), others can be total players. The really immature ones can see girls as little toys with emotions to play with. That is soo not cool. But they're not all like that.
    Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)

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    I just think that's the nature of most relationships. They start out really fun like that, then they just burn out too quickly. The only thing that really matters is if that person is there for you in a concrete way. (Do they show up, do favors for you, do they treat you more than just a love/sex kitten etc.)

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    I just think that's the nature of most relationships. They start out really fun like that, then they just burn out too quickly. The only thing that really matters is if that person is there for you in a concrete way. (Do they show up, do favors for you, do they treat you more than just a love/sex kitten etc.)
    That sound like you need Extrovert Sensing.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    I just think that's the nature of most relationships. They start out really fun like that, then they just burn out too quickly. The only thing that really matters is if that person is there for you in a concrete way. (Do they show up, do favors for you, do they treat you more than just a love/sex kitten etc.)
    I see where you are coming from but there is something called LOYALTY that I'm very fond of...
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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    Sounds to me like you really weren't as close as you thought.

    His behavior sounds really erratic, immature and in fact quite *premature*. Likely he was infatuated with some construct or idea of you, but not actually you. But definitely he didn't love you. Love isn't about some kind of running hot-cold nonsense kind of manipulation.

    Perhaps you began to share some personal things, experiences and began to feel closer to him because of that. I do this myself. I've also frequently allowed my desire to be closer to prompt me to assume I actually WAS closer to someone than reality eventually bore out.

    And yes, most recently with an IEE.

    As a former lover of mine once eloquently said: "Acknowledge; move on".
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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    Again I love most Deltas. Just not this one
    LIAR


    I really don't get where this idea of "proclaiming your feelings for women" came from. It's the most asinine thing you could do.
    "Those who make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities..."

    - Voltaire

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    Quote Originally Posted by LokiVanguard View Post
    I really don't get where this idea of "proclaiming your feelings for women" came from. It's the most asinine thing you could do.
    If done too soon and especially if the feelings are not [yet?] reciprocated, it can be quite a deal-breaker. Please: actions, not words.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LokiVanguard View Post
    LIAR


    I really don't get where this idea of "proclaiming your feelings for women" came from. It's the most asinine thing you could do.
    No I'm not. I really do like Deltas. Not as much as I like Betas kidding...
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune View Post
    Sounds to me like you really weren't as close as you thought.

    His behavior sounds really erratic, immature and in fact quite *premature*. Likely he was infatuated with some construct or idea of you, but not actually you. But definitely he didn't love you. Love isn't about some kind of running hot-cold nonsense kind of manipulation.

    Perhaps you began to share some personal things, experiences and began to feel closer to him because of that. I do this myself. I've also frequently allowed my desire to be closer to prompt me to assume I actually WAS closer to someone than reality eventually bore out.

    And yes, most recently with an IEE.

    As a former lover of mine once eloquently said: "Acknowledge; move on".
    Well I'm slowly getting over it. I choose not to think about it. I just can't way to spite him. I know what to do to tick him off
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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    I would systematically ruin his life, but I'm a vindictive bitch. If there's anything I hate, it's people who pull YOU through the wringer while you try your best to be nice and help them and then they turn around and treat you like shit.
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    IMO this guy sounds more SEE than IEE. Just a thought.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Starfall View Post
    Yeah, I also thought the guy sounded more SEE than IEE, but I didn't want to say anything...

    I've known many IEE's onetreehilluver, and his traits did not strike me as IEE at all. SEE's on the other hand tend to move very fast with advances that are not well thought out so it's not uncommon for a SEE to quickly come to conclusions when it comes to these things.

    Me and my friend have considered SEE for him however we're certain that he is IEE.
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    This is not a thread against Delta's. I'm just ranting about this one ENFp....

    So there was this ENFp who was totally obsessed with me. He proclaimed his love for me after only knowing me for 3 months. I wasn't even friends with him. He befriended all of my friends and started hanging out at the student center to try to get with me. After a while I got fed up and said yes because everyone I know was bothering me about.
    I ended it four hours later over MSN. We tried to become good friends after that. We both used to talk on the phone, and online for hours, and it was fun. It worked well for a few months and one day he calls me out of the blue saying" I love you. We're meant to be. You just don't see that yet."
    I thought he was going crazy so I ignored him. After a while I started talking to him and everything was going fine up until recently when he got with his new girlfriend. I asked him if he can hang out and he said I had to "declare whether I was his friend or not" WTF...who does that? So I tried to be friendly the other day and he said "I'm going to be clear. I never don't want to see, speak, or hear from you again."
    Like who the hell does he think he is. It really bothers me that we were good friends but he ditched me. He has no right to do that. And no one I ever met wanted me to state whether we were friends or not. Seriously there is is no loyalty. I need more BETAS..ARGGGHHH

    Again I love most Deltas. Just not this one
    it could be that he had feelings for you, which were strengthened by seeing you, and such feelings were deemed an unacceptable threat to any chance of getting his new "relationship" to work. hence by avoiding you he successfully avoids "mentally cheating" on his new girlfriend or what have you

    if that's the case then really, your friendship wasn't going to go anywhere good any time soon so it could be a blessing in disguise
    INFp-Ni

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    Quote Originally Posted by misutii View Post
    it could be that he had feelings for you, which were strengthened by seeing you, and such feelings were deemed an unacceptable threat to any chance of getting his new "relationship" to work. hence by avoiding you he successfully avoids "mentally cheating" on his new girlfriend or what have you

    if that's the case then really, your friendship wasn't going to go anywhere good any time soon so it could be a blessing in disguise
    I actually thought of that he was trying to make his relationship work. It sucks but I'll get it over it.
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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    Quote Originally Posted by misutii View Post
    it could be that he had feelings for you, which were strengthened by seeing you, and such feelings were deemed an unacceptable threat to any chance of getting his new "relationship" to work. hence by avoiding you he successfully avoids "mentally cheating" on his new girlfriend or what have you

    if that's the case then really, your friendship wasn't going to go anywhere good any time soon so it could be a blessing in disguise
    lol, so far i wouldn´t call "mentally cheating" something that is high on the list of things that IEEs don´t like or avoid doing.
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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    He proclaimed his love for me after only knowing me for 3 months.
    Three months?? What took him so long? I usually don't need longer than 5 minutes. And although I've often heard that that couldn't be possible, occasionally they are not skeptical enough to not fall for it.
    “I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that.” --- Pippi Longstocking

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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    yeah I'm really upset by those two the most. I'm really upset by it but I try not to show it so I laugh it off with friends. But the second comment is really ridiculous. The last time we talked we were just trying to figure things out. I'm deeply hurt by it and he proved my trust issues to be true...

    yeah listen to yourself you need more beta gamma whatever. dont feed into it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by misutii View Post

    if that's the case then really, your friendship wasn't going to go anywhere good any time soon so it could be a blessing in disguise

    it is a blessing in disguise you know what your dual energy is you're not going to find it there dont get entangled.

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    Quote Originally Posted by onetreehilluver View Post
    This is not a thread against Delta's. I'm just ranting about this one ENFp....

    So there was this ENFp who was totally obsessed with me. He proclaimed his love for me after only knowing me for 3 months. I wasn't even friends with him. He befriended all of my friends and started hanging out at the student center to try to get with me. After a while I got fed up and said yes because everyone I know was bothering me about.
    I ended it four hours later over MSN. We tried to become good friends after that. We both used to talk on the phone, and online for hours, and it was fun. It worked well for a few months and one day he calls me out of the blue saying" I love you. We're meant to be. You just don't see that yet."
    I thought he was going crazy so I ignored him. After a while I started talking to him and everything was going fine up until recently when he got with his new girlfriend. I asked him if he can hang out and he said I had to "declare whether I was his friend or not" WTF...who does that? So I tried to be friendly the other day and he said "I'm going to be clear. I never don't want to see, speak, or hear from you again."
    Like who the hell does he think he is. It really bothers me that we were good friends but he ditched me. He has no right to do that. And no one I ever met wanted me to state whether we were friends or not. Seriously there is is no loyalty. I need more BETAS..ARGGGHHH

    Again I love most Deltas. Just not this one
    LOL i just read this again and i am laughing really hard.
    (D)IEE~FI-(C)SLE~Ni E-5w4(Sp/Sx)/7w8(So/Sp)/9w1(sp/sx)

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    1)
    A girl who I want to date, asks me: well first tell me how tall you are?
    My reply: well I will answer that, if you first tell me how much you weigh!

    2)
    A girl I was dating said she was oh so great at sex etc, but she didn't do blowjobs.
    My reply: Oh I'm really romantic etc, I just will never take you out to dinner.

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    Quote Originally Posted by consentingadult View Post
    Three months?? What took him so long? I usually don't need longer than 5 minutes. And although I've often heard that that couldn't be possible, occasionally they are not skeptical enough to not fall for it.
    loldelta.

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    People I've gotten over it. I'm happy with the Se I'm getting
    ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
    "And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
    formerly onetreehilluver

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