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Thread: :Fe: and :Fi:

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    Default :Fe: and :Fi:

    People that seem to understand/value my know when I'm just joking/embellishing for effect, and when I'm being serious and concrete. I don't even have to try to get them to understand, they just know the difference beautifully. They know when I'm being cute and when I'm being serious about something. The good ones then don't allow me to hide behind my strong convictions by doing the cute little INFp golden retriever puppy dog face thing.

    But people that are shit in take one little thing I say out of proportion and think the whole thing is faulty. As if one little rib or 'glitch in the matrix' is going to make that much difference. This makes me want to hurt them, of course.

    To be fair, just plain confuses me. How do I know how you're really communicating? It just all seems harsh and weird. I like how you can really understand how I feel about people on the forum and stuff. Sometimes you better understand my own personal feelings even before I do, and that is nifty. Kind of a passive/distant Buddhist approach. But it lacks the raw/sensual energy for me.

    I want types to counsel me on what type of relationships I really need. To give me that sense of wholeness and health (Kind of a and hybrid). But I personally do not want to have relationships with types themselves. So I appreciate the free service, and also the paid therapeutic help of psychologists. I just cannot personally value it in my own life. I still recognize its importance though.

    It's just I've noticed I can fool other types easily with who I enjoy. But to types themselves it's more obvious and pronounced. It's like I go out of my way thinking that who I like/don't like is a secret by being quiet. But it's like you guys pick up on the subtle things (in real life I mean) and pick up on it anyway. It's quite nice. You'd think that I would like fall in love with you forever because this is all I ever wanted out of my own life. But it's more of a business thing with us.

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    You aren't confused about Fi. You are strong at both Fi and Fe. Look at how good you are at judging people's underlying motivations and relationships. You don't value Fi as much as Fe but you're still strong at it.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Oh.

    Well I was under the mistaken impression that you had to be strong in one and weak in the other. But it looks like it's not like that at all. It's just about a personal value thing you know. Like, knowing how to cook both turkey and steak but liking to eat the steak more just because, that's what you like. (I think that analogy is correct enough. I guess?)

    Thanks again Slacker Mom. =D

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    Wow. This also makes sense that I'm an IEI because as my 8th function my Fi is stronger than I realize.

    This means I can protect the SLE's vulnerable without being patronizing or overbearing about it, because nobody likes that about their polrs. So I can do it naturally without them ever knowing because I'm not harping on their polr.

    Wow! It makes so much sense my heart just skipped a beat for reals. I <3 socionics again. =p

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    But it's still not my ego or dominant function. I mean I don't just go to a group of people and instantly understand how much people like each other lol. Maybe dominants don't do that either. I think I end up realizing it over time, but it just happens slower, or maybe in the back of my mind where I don't think it's that big of a deal. I'm kinda just worrying about how I can get through the next moment.

    But it makes sense that I am stronger than I think about it. But it will probably always be this way.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    But it's still not my ego or dominant function. I mean I don't just go to a group of people and instantly understand how much people like each other lol. Maybe dominants don't do that either. I think I end up realizing it over time, but it just happens slower, or maybe in the back of my mind where I don't think it's that big of a deal. I'm kinda just worrying about how I can get through the next moment.

    But it makes sense that I am stronger than I think about it. But it will probably always be this way.
    It isn't dominant, and you don't value it like you do Fe, but it is still very strong. The 8th function is strong and strongly used when useful or necessary, and like you said you can kind of rescue your dual when that function comes into play sometimes, so it's useful.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Wow. This also makes sense that I'm an IEI because as my 8th function my Fi is stronger than I realize.

    This means I can protect the SLE's vulnerable without being patronizing or overbearing about it, because nobody likes that about their polrs. So I can do it naturally without them ever knowing because I'm not harping on their polr.

    Wow! It makes so much sense my heart just skipped a beat for reals. I <3 socionics again. =p
    How fickle.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    But it's still not my ego or dominant function. I mean I don't just go to a group of people and instantly understand how much people like each other lol. Maybe dominants don't do that either. I think I end up realizing it over time, but it just happens slower, or maybe in the back of my mind where I don't think it's that big of a deal. I'm kinda just worrying about how I can get through the next moment.

    But it makes sense that I am stronger than I think about it. But it will probably always be this way.
    Bah, I have weak Fi and I try to do that!

    The easiest way is to take a little stab here and there.

    And measure how other people react.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom View Post
    You aren't confused about Fi. You are strong at both Fi and Fe. Look at how good you are at judging people's underlying motivations and relationships. You don't value Fi as much as Fe but you're still strong at it.
    You don't have to use Fi to understand peoples' motivations. And all I saw him doing was conveying observations and insights anyway.

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    Quote Originally Posted by strrrng View Post
    You don't have to use Fi to understand peoples' motivations. And all I saw him doing was conveying observations and insights anyway.
    Most people tell you their motivations! And they lie or tell the truth. You just have to listen to them.

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    removed rant
    Last edited by Kristiina; 10-07-2008 at 12:56 PM.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
    New blog: http://having-a-kid.blogspot.com/

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom View Post
    It isn't dominant, and you don't value it like you do Fe, but it is still very strong. The 8th function is strong and strongly used when useful or necessary, and like you said you can kind of rescue your dual when that function comes into play sometimes, so it's useful.
    Have you ever rescued an ISTp?
    Quote Originally Posted by Mariano Rajoy View Post
    Pop psychology isn't rocket science.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Robot View Post
    Have you ever rescued an ISTp?
    I've done lots of things to an ISTp.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom View Post
    I've done lots of things to an ISTp.
    lol, why does that make me think naughty thoughts...
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
    New blog: http://having-a-kid.blogspot.com/

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina View Post
    lol, why does that make me think naughty thoughts...
    I couldn't think of a good answer. He probably wants examples but I can't think of any this moment. I've probably posted some examples before. Anyway, I couldn't think of a good answer so I did the smart-ass thing.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina View Post
    lol, why does that make me think naughty thoughts...
    lol, you're not alone
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom View Post
    I couldn't think of a good answer. He probably wants examples but I can't think of any this moment. I've probably posted some examples before. Anyway, I couldn't think of a good answer so I did the smart-ass thing.
    Haha.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mariano Rajoy View Post
    Pop psychology isn't rocket science.

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