My Close Friends

[confused84]

Hi

I just came to the haunting realization that every close friend I have ever had has been from my own quadra.

Can anyone else relate or do you have close friends from other quadras too.

[FDG]

Uhm. Yes, perhaps one. Not usual, though.

[unefille]

Of my 3 closet friends, 2 are Gamma (SEE and ILI). Closest, but not necessarily understanding me the best, or the most compatible in terms of personality. But other things are also important in a friendship and what's most important here is that we share a 'history' together.

[pinkcanary]

My two best friends are ESTj and ESFp.

[confused84]

What the hell is wrong with me then if I can't make friends form other qaudras.

[unefille]

What the hell is wrong with me then if I can't make friends form other qaudras.

Maybe some of them are from other quadras and you've mistyped them?

[confused84]

you're obviously deformed

Yeah I must be.

[confused84]

I have not typed them wrong they have taken tests and agreed with the profile infomation they have read about themselves.

I have one close friend Infp but she is my mothers friend and I have known her all my life. She is my like a member of the family now and her husband I also get along with.

But you can't count them they are my mothers friends.

[unefille]

You're Alpha, right?

Maybe you live in a weird Alpha enclave. Maybe you have exceptionally low tolerance for differences amongst people with whom you associate yourself.

I don't know, but I would be inclined to say that it would be exception, rather than the rule, that someone has ONLY close friends of their quadra. It would also, however, turn on how 'close friends' is defined and how many close friends you have, I guess.

[confused84]

It's true I scare people away. When they are my parents friends they can't run away, especially when my ESE father the his world famous cappuccino and tells them them the stories with lots salsa and FE spatters all over the room getting inside the locks in the doors and jamming them so they can't leave.

[confused84]

You're Alpha, right?

Maybe you live in a weird Alpha enclave. Maybe you have exceptionally low tolerance for differences amongst people with whom you associate yourself.

I don't know, but I would be inclined to say that it would be exception, rather than the rule, that someone has ONLY close friends of their quadra. It would also, however, turn on how 'close friends' is defined and how many close friends you have, I guess.

A close friend to me is one that I want to spend time with that doesn't seem one sided. I can tell when people don't like me or they like me less then they let on.

I exceptionally high tolerance for differences amongst people when I get screwed over by people from other quadras that's a different story.


The Enfp that a can't seem to get any further with If I said nothing a tumbleweed would roll across the room.

The Enfj that acts like a queer because he think it's funny and decides to play spotlight and 11 pm at night near a place that has been robbed and the police a still investigating. The he talks about how weird I am behind my back.

They are the only one I have typed so far the are many more trust me.

[Ritella]

You're fine.

My best friend at any given moment is always an ENFP. And I have a very close SLI friend.
I have a handful of pretty close Alpha, Gamma friends after that.

[JuJu]

I grew up around Betas... Most of my friends have been from that quadra (mostly INFps...) The few ppl I've met from Delta--I've liked them a lot.

[strrrng]

I have always gotten along best with betas (in retrospect, of course) and have a strong bias towards them. We just relate on too many levels (which, partly, are enneagram-related -- sx/sp FTW) and have too many similarities for me to not have a bias at this point. My best friend is Se-ESTp 7w6 sx/so; a family friend who is like an older sister to me is Ni-ENFj 7w6 sx/so; my favorite athletics coach (and one of my favorite people, in general) is Se-ESTp 8w7 sx/sp (and absolutely crazy <3). So, yeah, just the way it is.

[Expat]

My closest long-term friends are ISTj, INFj and one ESFp.

I think both semi-duality and illusion are good for friendships, and they are outside your quadra.

[Slacker]

I have a lot of gamma friends. And a lot of delta friends of course. And alpha friends too. Fewer beta friends but I have some of those too. That's trickier because often beta people like my husband but not me, or like me but not my husband.

Open up a bit!

[Expat]

That's trickier because often beta people like my husband but not me, or like me but not my husband.

Interesting observation, I had never thought of that but I think it's very common.

[Park]

My closest long-term friends are ISTj, INFj and one ESFp.

No ISTp?

Interesting observation, I had never thought of that but I think it's very common.

Explanation please.