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Thread: Do you ever feel stuck? Motivation.

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    Default Do you ever feel stuck? Motivation.

    In a rut or a funk? What do you do to get out of it? How often does it happen? Ive been out of work for a couple of months (school starts later this month.) I just dont seem to be motivated to do anything. Its not like me. When Im in motion I seem to be able to accomplish a great deal but when Im at rest ie, not working, other things seem to be a great challenge too. What gives?

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    I get into ruts quickly...but I also get out of them quickly. i find that just doing shit that I've been procrastinating on helps motivate me more, like ... some... kinda snowball.
    "Those who make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities..."

    - Voltaire

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    I get into ruts a lot. Only thing that seems to get me out of them is a change of scenery, change of career, change of people I surround myself with, etc. It's much easier said than done though.

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    Topaz.




    Topaz.




    Topaz.




    Oh MY GOODNESSSSSS...

    I feel like you're reading my mind.


    I'd say about 75-80% of the time (continuous time, mind you) I'm in a rut or a funk, and that would include now. It is extremely difficult for me to climb out of extended ruts (like the one I'm in now) and it is quite frustrating.
    INFj

    9w1 sp/sx

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    Topaz, I'm sorry to hear this... I don't know whether to express empathy, (which you've got, believe me,) or advice... I'll just answer your questions.

    To get out of a rut... I'll speak for myself: there must be new possibilities... I've been mired in ruts for months--addicted to drugs or some girl or just naval-gazing, as my I've heard it called, sometimes waking up whenever and doing nothing except eating... This usually happens for a period of several weeks during a given year.

    Honestly, this happened to me a few months ago, just before I enrolled in a graduate journalism program... I'd been working a job that paid well, but did not satisfy me deep down... I wanted to feel like I was making a difference--to be more than just a cog in a machine.

    Occasionally, during this rut, my thoughts would turn morose (Heideggerian)--i.e. "you're going to die someday--given that, what are you going to do in this limited time you have passing over the Earth?" Believe it or not, such thoughts would scare me into planning new projects. (In planning, I would think, "what are my main talents? What would I really like to do? Could that benefit other people?") Once I answered these questions, I'd devise potential strategies... From those, I would pick the one about which I felt best.

    Once I began to work toward my goal, rut=gone.

    I hope that you get out of yours soon., Tereg.. You too, tereg... I know that they can be very disheartening... And know that you have friends on this forum, both of you

    P.S. I agree with everything that Jessica writes above too... All of those things have helped me in the past.

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    thanks for the sympathy and advice guys. Im not normally blase' and unmotivated. In fact I would think I would be the most psyched because Im not working in an office anymore. Im gong to school, majoring in what I love most: Art. Problem is I haven't been doing much of anything. I had planned to get all these paintings done and put together a portfolio I guess I just don't work well on my own. So I figure, well, even if Im not painting I should take a temp job. For some reason there are very few jobs. No one is calling. So I got time on my hands. No money and I feel so uninspired. I used to have a million ideas.
    I know its just a phase though. Its happened before. No money, no honey, no calls, nothing and then POW!! It all ends and then everybody is calling and wanting me and Im super busy. So I just have to wait it out. Its like it happens in cycles. I don't know why.

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tereg View Post
    Topaz.




    Topaz.




    Topaz.




    Oh MY GOODNESSSSSS...

    I feel like you're reading my mind.


    I'd say about 75-80% of the time (continuous time, mind you) I'm in a rut or a funk, and that would include now. It is extremely difficult for me to climb out of extended ruts (like the one I'm in now) and it is quite frustrating.
    Poor kid. OK if I can give you advice then I can take it as well. Lets see...what would I say? hmmmmmm..... AH HA! You/I need to get some exercise and fresh air! that will clear our minds! OK Im going to take a jog. Let me know if this helps. I'll get back to you.

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    I get into ruts very easily and very often. And it's also been hard to get out of them lately. I seem to posses a great lack of motivation, and it's hard to find the will and strength to get myself up and do things, even the ones I am "supposed to" or "want to" be doing. When I have a worked out plan and a concrete goal I am unstoppable until I get results but when I am not moving it's hard to get my ass to do anything. Change helps a lot too but I usually need others to present me with new ideas and prospects that I would be willing to do/undertake. I have only one Ne ego friend at the moment. I need more.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz View Post
    thanks for the sympathy and advice guys. Im not normally blase' and unmotivated. In fact I would think I would be the most psyched because Im not working in an office anymore. Im gong to school, majoring in what I love most: Art. Problem is I haven't been doing much of anything. I had planned to get all these paintings done and put together a portfolio I guess I just don't work well on my own. So I figure, well, even if Im not painting I should take a temp job. For some reason there are very few jobs. No one is calling. So I got time on my hands. No money and I feel so uninspired. I used to have a million ideas.
    I know its just a phase though. Its happened before. No money, no honey, no calls, nothing and then POW!! It all ends and then everybody is calling and wanting me and Im super busy. So I just have to wait it out. Its like it happens in cycles. I don't know why.
    haha, this is so true about the cycles. That happens with me a lot. No job, no calls, nothing... and then like you said, everything comes all at once. You just have to ride it out and accept that it'll pass but no one want's to hear that answer. And I'm with you on the job issue. I have been applying and posting my resume to places on a daily basis for the past few months and nothing...nothing. It's rough out there but things seem to always work out in the end.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz View Post
    Its like it happens in cycles. I don't know why.
    That's pretty much how I see it happens in my life too actually.

    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz View Post
    AH HA! You/I need to get some exercise and fresh air! that will clear our minds! OK Im going to take a jog. Let me know if this helps. I'll get back to you.
    As much as I have always wanted to be an independent individual, I have always wanted to have a friend (or a few) who will call me up to do stuff like this together. You see, I can't motivate myself to go jogging by myself. It's so much better in good company.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    You see, I can't motivate myself to go jogging by myself. It's so much better in good company.
    HEY WINTERPARK, GUESS WHAT? THIS MEANS UR ESTP!!!



    nah, I know what you mean. I'm the same way.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    It's rough out there but things seem to always work out in the end.
    It just sucks when you have to wait for that end and you're far from it, doesn't it?
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    HEY WINTERPARK, GUESS WHAT? THIS MEANS UR ESTP!!!
    Not when your good company is Deltas, Ne EPs and enneagram 7s.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    It just sucks when you have to wait for that end and you're far from it, doesn't it?
    It does but I've always held onto the belief that everything happens for a reason. I guess that makes it easier for me to deal with setbacks and ruts and what not. You learn from the tough times and you only grow stronger. I'm very good at letting life just happen.

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    I would go out to take a jog but I just.... I just don't feel it.

    I'm horribly uninspired, unmotivated... even, dare I say, unhappy right now.

    And it's not the job, the job is good. I'm at a job also that pays well that is in an area that I do well in, where the other employees like having me around and where I feel like an integral part of the company. That's not the problem.

    It's those stretches of days where I spend weekends without ever leaving my apartment, where I can't focus on things I need to do while I'm at work and I'm extremely unproductive. Weeks, months where I do the same things day in and day out without much variation. Sure, there's some variation but it's just not enough. It's just fermenting stagnation. Change of scenery? I think about that a lot, but then I think, is that really addressing the issue? Is that really going to fix the problem, because it's basically a band-aid.

    I feel like I'm constantly wasting time. I try to work up the energy to start on a task, going "Ok, when I sit back down at my desk, I'm going to ____" and I sit down at my desk, and I just can't. And then some issue comes up at work that I get to work on for an hour or two unrelated to that "one thing" I know I need to work on, but yet it still feels like "Oh, cool, I finally did something somewhat productive. Ok, maybe I can finish _____ now." It's like I just won a small battle. Usually this is when there's not much going on at work and I have time to work on these side things.

    It's not boredom. I have things that I know I can do. I've just been unable to get jump started on those things.

    Even on more personal type of tasks. Like I the other day I started working on the IEE type description on the wikisocion (so that it can finally be finished!) and I actually wrote out the Ti and Se parts, and I was going to write out the Super-Id section after that, and I just couldn't get jump started to start writing it. I had everything out that I wanted to read over before I started, and I just couldn't really get through it.

    That's where I'm at.
    INFj

    9w1 sp/sx

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    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    You learn from the tough times and you only grow stronger.
    As much as I want to believe in that statement, I have become very skeptical of its validity in my life. It seems like whenever I get hit by a large stone the only thing that grows stronger is my desire not to have to deal with another one again. It's like I feel I get weaker afterwards instead of stronger.

    Quote Originally Posted by jessica129 View Post
    I'm very good at letting life just happen.
    Me too, but unfortunately it has it's own drawbacks.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tereg View Post
    I would go out to take a jog but I just.... I just don't feel it.

    I'm horribly uninspired, unmotivated... even, dare I say, unhappy right now.

    And it's not the job, the job is good. I'm at a job also that pays well that is in an area that I do well in, where the other employees like having me around and where I feel like an integral part of the company. That's not the problem.

    It's those stretches of days where I spend weekends without ever leaving my apartment, where I can't focus on things I need to do while I'm at work and I'm extremely unproductive. Weeks, months where I do the same things day in and day out without much variation. Sure, there's some variation but it's just not enough. It's just fermenting stagnation. Change of scenery? I think about that a lot, but then I think, is that really addressing the issue? Is that really going to fix the problem, because it's basically a band-aid.

    I feel like I'm constantly wasting time. I try to work up the energy to start on a task, going "Ok, when I sit back down at my desk, I'm going to ____" and I sit down at my desk, and I just can't. And then some issue comes up at work that I get to work on for an hour or two unrelated to that "one thing" I know I need to work on, but yet it still feels like "Oh, cool, I finally did something somewhat productive. Ok, maybe I can finish _____ now." It's like I just won a small battle. Usually this is when there's not much going on at work and I have time to work on these side things.

    It's not boredom. I have things that I know I can do. I've just been unable to get jump started on those things.

    Even on more personal type of tasks. Like I the other day I started working on the IEE type description on the wikisocion (so that it can finally be finished!) and I actually wrote out the Ti and Se parts, and I was going to write out the Super-Id section after that, and I just couldn't get jump started to start writing it. I had everything out that I wanted to read over before I started, and I just couldn't really get through it.

    That's where I'm at.
    I am starting to feel like your identical, guys.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    That's pretty much how I see it happens in my life too actually.
    It's interesting because I see my life in waves, different amplitudes of various states I find myself in. How deep of a rut am I in? Am I going uphill or downhill, etc etc.

    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    As much as I have always wanted to be an independent individual, I have always wanted to have a friend (or a few) who will call me up to do stuff like this together. You see, I can't motivate myself to go jogging by myself. It's so much better in good company.
    This is how I feel. I just don't like doing that kind of stuff alone.
    INFj

    9w1 sp/sx

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    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    As much as I have always wanted to be an independent individual, I have always wanted to have a friend (or a few) who will call me up to do stuff like this together. You see, I can't motivate myself to go jogging by myself. It's so much better in good company.
    I know what you mean. So many of my old friends are married or just too busy or far away for me to call them up to do stuff like that spontaneously. I really need a good relationship right now. Thats the bottom line I guess.

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tereg View Post
    This is how I feel. I just don't like doing that kind of stuff alone.
    I 've been biking from time to time recently. What I have noticed is that my biking frequentness drops hugely when the two people I usually bike with are unavailable, especially for longer periods of time. To me, the joy of these recreations is not in themselves alone, but they are merely ways to spend quality time, interact with people, get closer to nature and experience life, besides of course maintaining and improving my physical and mental condition.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

  21. #21
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    I want to say "thanks" to everyone who has posted in this thread. I relate with you all so much in the things you say about the way you view the world that it's ridiculous in a comforting kind of way, and that's really nice. Thank you.


    I don't have a lot to add, I'm afraid, in the way of helping anyone out of a slump. I'm in a bit of one myself at the moment... maybe it would be helpful if I describe the way I deal with it: like Jessica said she does, I just move forward with faith that everything that's happening [or not happening] is that way for some reason... not necessarily in a pre-ordained way, but in a way that will make me stronger/wiser/better when I rise out of it. And maybe that's the key to the whole thing: that I don't ever really doubt that I'll come up and out of each slump in the end.

    You could say that I look at emotional pain the same way I look at physical pain: as something to be endured, then learned from and hopefully avoided in the future. I think of a broken heart, for instance, similarly to the way I think of a stubbed toe: it hurts, hurts, hurts, but I keep a straight face and just stand still for a moment while I wait for the pain to fade and pass, as I know it will. And in time [the amount of time that needs to pass being relative to the depth of the pain], it does pass, without fail. This is what I remind myself of, over and over, until I don’t need to anymore.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Winterpark View Post
    As much as I want to believe in that statement, I have become very skeptical of its validity in my life. It seems like whenever I get hit by a large stone the only thing that grows stronger is my desire not to have to deal with another one again. It's like I feel I get weaker afterwards instead of stronger.
    Hmm. I would say that once I've overcome a challenge or setback, I have proven my ability to handle it, but also hopefully that I've learned how to either avoid or at least mitigate its occurrence in the future.
    We certainly shouldn't want to have to deal with large stones. But knowing that large stones happen no matter what, coupled with the memories of having risen to meet their challenge in the past, can help us worry less right now about when the next one will come along.
    Quote Originally Posted by Charles Bukowski
    We're all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn't. We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities, we are eaten up by nothing.
    SLI

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    Quote Originally Posted by iAnnAu View Post
    Hmm. I would say that once I've overcome a challenge or setback, I have proven my ability to handle it, but also hopefully that I've learned how to either avoid or at least mitigate its occurrence in the future.
    We certainly shouldn't want to have to deal with large stones. But knowing that large stones happen no matter what, coupled with the memories of having risen to meet their challenge in the past, can help us worry less right now about when the next one will come along.
    at me now sounding like I'm writing my own self-help book. Joy must be rubbing off on me!
    Quote Originally Posted by Charles Bukowski
    We're all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn't. We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities, we are eaten up by nothing.
    SLI

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    Quote Originally Posted by iAnnAu View Post
    Hmm. I would say that once I've overcome a challenge or setback, I have proven my ability to handle it, but also hopefully that I've learned how to either avoid or at least mitigate its occurrence in the future.
    We certainly shouldn't want to have to deal with large stones. But knowing that large stones happen no matter what, coupled with the memories of having risen to meet their challenge in the past, can help us worry less right now about when the next one will come along.
    Well that's all reasonable and sensible and all... but feelings and mental strength are not that simple and straight-forward, unfortunately.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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