I had that nightmare again

[Joy]

The one where I'm waitressing at this restaurant I used to work at. I woke up with that horrible feeling I'd get while waitressing, found that it was just a dream, and felt a huge sense of relief... "Oh yeah, that's right... I don't work there anymore." (I also had a dream that I got a little Yorkshire Terrier puppy though, so my dreams weren't all bad.)

Anyways, this topic is about Si and time. Most of the topics I write about Ni, Si, Te, etc. are about information aspects, but this one is about information elements.

• Waiting tables is an example of how timing can be more of a Si aspect than Ni is. When you are a waitress, you have to be very good at keeping track of who needs what and when, and you have to do more than one thing at once, timing it so that different tables get different things at different times. (It's hell.) The connections between activities that you have to keep track of are not internal/underlying, but external/readily apparent.
• Contrast this to bartending... when you're a bartender, you have to do a lot of different things at once quickly and efficiently, but there's no need to time anything. Being a good bartending is primarily about Te, where as being a good waitress is primarily about Si. Granted, there's a Fe aspect to both as well since they're both customer service positions, but for this example I'm contrasting Te (the external dynamics of objects) to Si (the external dynamics of fields).

There are exceptions, of course, in which Si is needed in bartending. One of these exceptions is the ability to be aware of when people are ready for another beer when they're drinking out of a can. If they're drinking out of a glass or even a bottle, I could tell by looking. With cans it was usually more difficult, and there was one bar I worked at where this (in combination with the need to leave the bar to make food in the kitchen) caused problems for me, and certain people (those who also resented my lack of Fe valuing, as I wrote about in another topic a while back) complained as a result. The fact that I was leaving the bar and couldn't see what was going on made me have to depend on Si to make sure that people were getting new drinks at the right time.

[aestrivex]

When you are a waitress, you have to be very good at keeping track of who needs what and when, and you have to do more than one thing at once, timing it so that different tables get different things at different times. (It's hell.) The connections between activities that you have to keep track of are not internal/underlying, but external/readily apparent.

wtf

[Joy]

?

[Darkstar]

uuh, I am not sure but I thinks wtf = What The Fuck

[discojoe]

uuh, I am not sure but I thinks wtf = What The Fuck

uuh, I am not sure but I thinks ? = I don't understand your reaction

[Logos]

There are exceptions, of course, in which Si is needed in bartending. One of these exceptions is the ability to be aware of when people are ready for another beer when they're drinking out of a can. If they're drinking out of a glass or even a bottle, I could tell by looking. With cans it was usually more difficult, and there was one bar I worked at where this (in combination with the need to leave the bar to make food in the kitchen) caused problems for me, and certain people (those who also resented my lack of Fe valuing, as I wrote about in another topic a while back) complained as a result. The fact that I was leaving the bar and couldn't see what was going on made me have to depend on Si to make sure that people were getting new drinks at the right time.

Or mixing and making drinks as appropriate to tastes?

[Joy]

When I was a student, I worked both as a bartender and as a waitress, and I was good at both. Always doing things faster than the others, having time to joke with people when everyone else went bananas with stress. I was fast, accurate (money and mix), fun and popular. The only thing I didn't handle well, was sexual approaches, I never knew how to act. But luckily the people working in the bar with me knew that, and helped med whenever I was in such kind of trouble (I was young, that's probably why).

I'm pretty sure I'm not strong in neither Si nor Te... so is it possible I used other functions? (I think so) or do you think my Si/Te are stronger than I think?

I don't know.

Wow, this is sort of a huge relief for me to hear. I've done the whole waitressing thing before, and I was completely horrible at it when it came to timing everything properly, and tending to peoples needs. When it came to the Fe aspect of it I was alright (though shyness and introversion didn't really help) but as a Ni ego type I was constantly stuck in my own little world, and no matter how hard I'd try I couldn't focus on my tables needs. It was actually really frustrating to me that I couldn't deal with these people the way they wanted to be dealt with, and I'd always feel bad about myself, especially when comparing myself to my ISFp friend who was a pro at it. I couldest relate to so many people at once, and like Mimosa Pudica I also couldn't handle the sexual remarks which actually really upset me.

It makes me feel better to know that there was a reason why I sucked. Strangely, I was actually talking to my therapist about this yesterday (this particular therapist is really into MBTI) and he said that waitressing is probably the worst thing an INFp can possibly do. He also said that INFP's make good bartenders because of their ability to relate to people on a one on one level.

I also noticed that sensory types seemed to be better at it (at least the part of it that I'm talking about).

Or mixing and making drinks as appropriate to tastes?

No. Bartending isn't like being an gourmet chef. Most of what I served was beer, shots, and stuff like rum and coke. And for the times when people ordered more complicated drinks, I had my bartending (mixology) course to fall back on.

[Blaze]

i also did both; i much preferred the bar to waitressing. i was not that good of a waitress. i couldn't stand people's picky little needs and requirements and complaints. and i couldn't keep track of everything, and i had no control over the kitchen, and i really did not like to schmoozle customers the way you have to.

but i was great behind the bar. much much better. you have a lot more control and in a way things are simpler (the product delivery part) but in another way more complicated (the talking and listening part).

[Logos]

No. Bartending isn't like being an gourmet chef. Most of what I served was beer, shots, and stuff like rum and coke. And for the times when people ordered more complicated drinks, I had my bartending (mixology) course to fall back on.

So you think, but it is in that mixology that my far more bar-going friends can tell the difference between a good and bad bartender immediately and their description of that quality matches that of a person with strong .

[Joy]

Okay, if I had never gone to bartending school I may not have known how to make drinks properly... but it's not difficult, by any means.

[Logos]

Okay, if I had never gone to bartending school I may not have known how to make drinks properly... but it's not difficult, by any means.

I understand that, but you do not seem to be understanding my point - adjusting to particular tastes - which has been observably more difficult than you are suggesting.

[Joy]

I understand that, but you do not seem to be understanding my point - adjusting to particular tastes - which has been observably more difficult than you are suggesting.

It's just a matter of remembering what people want, something I was very good at.

If someone said that (s)he wanted a frozen glass one day, the next time that person came I'd ask if (s)he wanted a frozen glass again (or, if it's hot out, just automatically use a frozen glass).

Some people would comment that I was using too much ice. I'd ask if they wanted a weaker drink or an extra shot. I'd remember it then after.

I'd always ask if people wanted a fresh glass, and those who did, I'd remember (oddly, most didn't). This was in a small town tavern though. When I worked at an upper scale resort I automatically gave people fresh glasses (which is how it's supposed to work).

If someone preferred an orange to a lemon with their hacker pschorr, I'd give them that from then on.

If someone asked for a Bud Light, I'd find out if they wanted tap, a can, or a bottle. I'd ask if they wanted a glass with it. I'd remember what they ordered for the next time they came. I'd usually confirm that they wanted the same thing (most people drank the same thing every time, but there were a few who didn't).



While these preferences are indeed a Si matter, remembering them is not.

[Logos]

Fair enough. I suppose it is as we have said before, it is possible to overcome the shortcomings of the weak functions through focusing on ways around them with your strong functions.

[Darkstar]

uuh, I am not sure but I thinks ? = I don't understand your reaction

uuh, I am not sure but I think you are trying to mirror me but I used BIG black letters, not small.

Wakey wakey with that se of yours

I'm sorry Joy for posting useless crap in your thread but niffweed started it!

I am open to deleting posts if asked.

[Joy]

it's fine

[FDG]

I am not really sure this has anything to do with functions to be honest.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

You might be onto something here. lol well uh all I know is I have a gay male friend who I think is my conflictor, he's very good at EVERYTHING dealing with restaurants. Me I don't give a shit, I make fun of that 'gay male service profession' stereotype so much. The thought of fluffing somebody's pillows on a plane or serving somebody's drinks is absolutely revolting and buttmonkey-ish to me.

[redbaron]

uuh, I am not sure but I thinks ? = I don't understand your reaction