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Thread: How does your type tend to handle parties or other large social gatherings?

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    hoodrat's Avatar
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    Default How does your type tend to handle parties or other large social gatherings?

    I'll start by talking about myself, an SEE, even though some have disputed this already . sadface.

    Anywho....

    When I'm at a large party, I'll first show up and tend to greet EVERYONE. I'll start off by shouting at my few closest friends who I'm most comforatable with, then work around the room saying hello to all the lesser relations. Then I'll usually finish up the introduction phase by introducing myself to the people I haven't met who seem interesting and aren't really socializing much/look like they're having an awkward time.

    After that, I like to grab a drink or two, and find something in the environment I can interact with, usually in a novel/unusual way to make people laugh. I act like people aren't watching me, but I know they are. I usually reward those who laugh at me by going over and talking to them more and entertaining them.

    After I get bored of the above activities, I'll usually get a little bit more "introverted", in the common usage of the term, and find 1 or 2 people to have deep conversations with, usually about who they're dating/who they like/etc. I may change who I chat up at this point once or twice between my close circle.

    I just lost track of what I was doing.....

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    I can't for the life of me figure out why I get invited to parties, but when I do i tend to act really extraverted until I drain out. But if I had it my way (which is how my type usually is), id rather people came to me.

    After a party though, I tend to become a hermit for a week and not want to see ANYONE.
    "Those who make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities..."

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    I avoid parties at all costs.
    If I happen to find myself at one (usually against my will), I skirt around the walls taking pictures, usually wondering when I can leave.
    I never approach anyone.
    If someone talks to me I'm more than happy to talk back.
    I never drink. Too many strangers. I don't feel safe.
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    I've been waiting for you Satan's Avatar
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    mmMmMmm

    Socialising.

    I like animated people.

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    It really depends on the type of party. If it's all friends I know well, then I'll be pretty loud and try to get everyone to have fun/be entertaining, or engage everyone in discussions about what's going on w/ their lives.

    If it's a huge party, I'll be more intimidated and a lot quieter. I'll probably just talk to the people I came with, unless other people seem very friendly. This is where people think I'm introverted.

    However, if it's a big party and the goal seems to be silly and relaxed then I will have a blast, most likely talk to many strangers and meet several new people. I might end up hanging out w/ the new people and forgetting where my friends are, etc.

    I'm really bad about "schmoozing" parties where everyone knows each other from some prestigious place and I'm just there. I never know what the protocol is on pretending to be impressive and so just don't try. And those people only like others who play the little game, so I get really bored at those things and wonder how everyone else is having fun.

    I absolutely hate greetings. I would prefer to not hug and/or kiss anyone on the cheek. Ick. I always give this awkward type fake hug thing, only because others insist on it. Everyone's doing the cheek kiss now and to me that's weird. And w/ guys it's hard to know if you should hug them when their gf is right there glaring at you, but you can't really slap his hand like a guy would...hate that stuff!

    my posts are always so rambly. sorry!
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    i only go if i think it's going to be good and i know at least a couple people there who i can hang with. if i hafta go alone, then i won't. i feel better if i have a posse or something.

    i'll tend to flit though when i'm there. but from the base of my people.

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    I deeply dislike any kind of parties. I only go if I "have" to for social or professional reasons, or if I am going to meet friends that I don't otherwise meet.

    Or, of course, things like the wedding party of a close friend. I have been to a huge party where I knew virtually nobody besides the groom; and I knew that he would have next to no time to talk to me. But I went, and found the party itself hugely boring, as I knew I would - but I wanted to go because I knew it was a special occasion for him.

    I have gone to New Year's eve parties also because I thought that it was stupid to stay at home, and at least there's something to eat and drink. But nowadays I don't do even that, unless, again, I know the people.
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    It really hugely depends on what kind of people there are, and what we are going to do.

    I appreciated a lot the party threw last year by an INTp friend for her birthday. She borrowed a small cottage in the mountains and threw the party there. Half the people I previously knew, half I didn't - so I had both the "anchor" of somebody I already knew, and other people I could get to know too.
    I also like dancing, so any party where I there's the possibility to dance is something I like. I generally don't like the parties meant to get drunk and do drugs etc; I mean, drinking can be fun if carried to the point where you are just sufficiently intoxicated to be dishinibited but also to be completely aware of what's happening around you. However, usually the aim of "drinking parties" is to get as drunk as you can, which I don't enjoy.

    I've got a problem sometimes that I'm not particularly good with social etiquette, so people might think I'm a bit weird. Ex. I never introduce myself to everybody like hoodrat does, because I don't think of it as "necessary"; however if I see somebody interesting I might just start a conversation interrupting everybody suddely without being particularly tactful (mostly because I don't know how to do it otherwise).

    Other times I'm just tired because I did many things during the day, so people might think I'm being "introverted" and try to make me dance and do things. I really dislike when this happens, because if I'm not doing them it's my choice (and often I might just be really really tired, ex. when I trained hard in the afternoon)
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    Quote Originally Posted by Expat View Post
    I deeply dislike any kind of parties. I only go if I "have" to for social or professional reasons, or if I am going to meet friends that I don't otherwise meet.

    Or, of course, things like the wedding party of a close friend. I have been to a huge party where I knew virtually nobody besides the groom; and I knew that he would have next to no time to talk to me. But I went, and found the party itself hugely boring, as I knew I would - but I wanted to go because I knew it was a special occasion for him.

    I have gone to New Year's eve parties also because I thought that it was stupid to stay at home, and at least there's something to eat and drink. But nowadays I don't do even that, unless, again, I know the people.
    I mostly agree, though I would replace "I deeply dislike any kind of parties" with "I usually dislike most kinds of parties." The problem is that at most parties there is essentially nothing to do, and it is generally nothing more than reinforced "fun" and socializing. I do not have as much of a problem at a larger gathering of friends, but at parties it often feels like something is supposed to happen that never does. Sometimes I go to parties to socialize if my close friends go or if there are people I know who will be there that I do not see often, but those are usually the only people I talk to at a party. It is nice to meet new people at parties, but since that is not my preferred setting for meeting people comfortably, I usually do not try to meet new people.

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    I rarely attend parties or gatherings or things of that nature if there's a lot of people there; the only time I really ever go out with others is for work dos and things of that nature. I tend to get extremely pissed off if I feel like I'm just being ignored or fading into the background or whatever so that's a large reason why I prefer not to go to them. At least with work dos I'm with and only with people I already know quite well. I've also decided more recently, based on experience, that I won't stay out if everyone else is going to get drunk, since I can't handle either the embarrassment of looking after them when they do silly things or whatever else might happen as a result of their inebriation, such as when 2 SEEs and one ESE took me out to a nightclub and, probably due to the alcohol, ended up leaving me standing there with their bags while they went off dancing. What really annoyed me is the next day, one of the SEEs didn't seem to think it was anything significant and brushed me off as being silly, even though the other two (the other SEE and the ESE) were genuinely sorry about it. So yeah, nothing good ever comes of me going to large gatherings or whatever. I like small social gatherings with people I already know. Things like sitting in a pub and chatting, maybe having something to eat. That's the sort of thing I like. Just something nice and quiet where I don't have to be physically active, but can interact with my friends. Needless to say I spend most of my spare time in my bedroom. And I bet most people who read that last sentence will automatically think of something dirty when they read it. I know I did. AND I BET YOU ALL WILL TOO
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    More people on a party means I'm getting more silence.

    So then I start drinking.

    And some more.

    And by that time, I'm pretty much into everything that's fun.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno View Post
    More people on a party means I'm getting more silence.

    So then I start drinking.

    And some more.

    And by that time, I'm pretty much into everything that's fun.
    Phew! I was starting to think that ILIs completely abstained from trashed-drunkenness, which i knew not to be true from personal experience. An old ILI friend I had was the best drunk to be around! He'd say the craziest, most creative, genuinely funny things I've ever heard....

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    I don't really get invited to parties. When I do, I just decline and won't go there. I suppose it could be possible to lure me into one, if the person asking me to join presented the idea right. But the few times people have asked me to go to one, they have just made the whole event sound repulsive to me. The only parties I have been to, have been parties that I have been obligated to go to, and I haven't bothered to make up an excuse to not go. So I go to a party about once every 2 years or so. I don't go to bars or clubs either.

    The few parties I have been to, I have found out to be mostly boring, there might be some funny moments, but the longer I'm there the more boring it gets. But overall I find parties a waste of time, and money, that sucks even more I have to spend money because of some party. I just sit there and wait for the party to end so I can leave home. I don't go to talk to other people, unless they are people who I normally talk to. Usually the parties I have been to don't have people like that. But if someone comes to talk to me, I'll talk to them. Some of the coversations have been funny and interesting, these have been with two ESFp's and one ENTj.

    Other people often ask me, from my point of view difficult or wierd questions, to normal person part of them are just normal questions, but since they aren't applicable to me or the thing just gets complicated or about something that I never even think about. I find it difficult to answer to them. And afterwards, for really long period of time, I'm bothered about not being able to give an answer that I find to be satisfactory. The exception to this is, that I randomly joke about the things happening there or relating what some people are saying.

    I might also walk around the place if there's some interesting things to look at. Or if it's dark outside, I sometimes just stare out the window to darkness, and think about stuff.

    If there's some lame group activity I refuse to participate in them, or might make mockery of it.

    Funniest things have been the ones that are the least "party-like", these have been one ISTp's ideas who's a friend of a guy I know. At one party we were bbq'ing sausages or wieners, whatever is most applicable. And one of the sausages fell to the ground, because nobody wanted to eat it, so he carved the sausage so it looked like a dick. Then we took funny pictures, and finally stuck it in to a play-cannon in one childrens park. That must have been an "interesting" suprise to the kids and their moms, when they came to park the next day Also at the same party we went to throw pebbles at some campers tents, who were sleeping in them, again this was the ISTp idea

    I don't drink at all. And one the most annoying things about parties is that people pester me about it.

    This might sound as if based many instances, because I generalized, but it's just based on a few parties.

    So overall I see parties as mostly boring and draining waste of time and money, where there's nothing to gain or learn.
    Last edited by Warlord; 07-11-2008 at 12:18 PM.
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    I had words here once, but I didn't feed them Khola's Avatar
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    I fekkin LOVE parties!!!

    I danzing, the drinking, the playing, the music raahh parties are the best

    I like to run around doing impressive shite with glow pois, singing loudly to the music and generally making ppl laugh and meet the newbies, etc.

    Partys are where I'm a viking
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    Quote Originally Posted by Warlord View Post
    I might also walk around the place if there's some interesting things to look at. Or if it's dark outside, I sometimes just stare out the window to darkness, and think about stuff.

    lol

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    Default ILI party behavior

    At parties I would follow one of these, from most to least frequent.

    1) Try not to attend.
    2) Attend and leave 5minutes after that.
    3) Attend and spend time only with known people
    3) Get drunk, truly annoying, ruin the party and hide from most or all of that people for the rest of my life.

    ^_^;
    Balzac

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    Khamelion's Avatar
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    im always different. sometimes im really not in the mood for it but i usually end up enjoying some aspect of it because ill drink to satisfy my boredom with the people AT the party.

    the only party ive really full on enjoyed was a halloween party in orlando. i loved the fact that i didnt really know ANYone there, i had the LEAST sluttiest costume yet got tons of the attention i wanted (meaning the guys who were actually curious about and not just making out. im sure they wanted to make out too but the fiance was there lololols....>_>)

    it was awesome...bouncing around to everyones little groups even though i had no idea how the groups had been formed or any of their history. i knew little bits and pieces just from the two people i came with whispering things to me every so often.


    on average i will talk to everyone, kind of like hoodrat...and then once i get my drink on i scope out who i want to engage in conversation and usually succeed in doing so. as a single party-goer...im usually causing drama by flirting too much around beta and alpha sf females ...who are apparently very sensitive to this. but i always act oblivious to the shit im stirring. because its ridiculous to be upset by it IMO. as a taken party-goer, im usually just really really chatty, moving around room to room. when my enfj friend always held parties she'd make me her like...honorary...calmer-downer....because she'd get over-whelmed and randomly whisper to me that im the only one keeping her grounded. i kind of enjoyed pretending to be istj lololols. but that cramps my style when im single


    if i go to too many parties in row i just get into TROUBLE so....small groups of close friends is usually superior
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    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    I went to one once. It was a birthday and an ESFp friend (who was invited herself) invited me. They had Mexican food. I ate it. They had a ping-pong table. I played with a couple of friends. They Turned up the music, turned down the lights, and had a dance. I plugged my ears and knitted.

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    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

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    I seem to have this thing where when I'm around large groups of people I just want to get away and be alone and when I'm alone I just want to go somewhere with people.

    I've managed to figure out a way to find peace in such situations - that is to make sure I'm invited to a party and tell myself I'm going to go, then procrastinate at the last minute and not go. This way it's like I'm kind of there but I'm really not but I could be if I wanted to....
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    So fluffeh. Cuddly McFluffles's Avatar
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    If I'm at a party, unless the person throwing it is a close friend, I was probably dragged....uh, I mean convinced to go by a friend. And once there, I will hang around said friend as much as possible. That said, I haven't been to many parties (sheltered and all that). "Large" and "gathering" strung together make me nervous, actually. One-on-one is just fine, thank you.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post
    I went to one once. It was a birthday and an ESFp friend (who was invited herself) invited me. They had Mexican food. I ate it. They had a ping-pong table. I played with a couple of friends. They Turned up the music, turned down the lights, and had a dance. I plugged my ears and knitted.
    that sounds like a strange party. >_>



    the parties i go to usually involve everyone bringing their own sort of alcohol, a deck of cards, maybe cranium if i dont instantly boycott it ...the thing about cranium is that i usually enjoy playing it when im already in the middle of it..(being drunk helps a LOT) but when it comes to starting the game up im usually all against it. some sort of strange anxiety i get...

    oh, sometimes there is pizza and wings...yumm...wings...varsity club
    zomg my first time missing florida, how gay.
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    Darn Socks Director Abbie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Khamelion View Post
    that sounds like a strange party. >_>



    the parties i go to usually involve everyone bringing their own sort of alcohol, a deck of cards, maybe cranium if i dont instantly boycott it ...the thing about cranium is that i usually enjoy playing it when im already in the middle of it..(being drunk helps a LOT) but when it comes to starting the game up im usually all against it. some sort of strange anxiety i get...

    oh, sometimes there is pizza and wings...yumm...wings...varsity club
    zomg my first time missing florida, how gay.
    I'm in high school. It was a birthday party.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ritella View Post
    Over here, we'll put up with (almost) all of your crap. You just have to use the secret phrase: "I don't value it. It's related to <insert random element here>, which is not in my quadra."
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquagraph View Post
    Abbie is so boring and rigid it's awesome instead of boring and rigid. She seems so practical and down-to-the-ground.

  23. #23
    Khamelion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Director Abbie View Post
    I'm in high school. It was a birthday party.
    oooooOOoOoooo

    that whole dance thing sounds embarrassing. i would have started reading instead of knitting but you had the right idea
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    [21:29] hitta: idealism is just the gap between the thought of death
    [21:29] hitta: and not dying
    .

  24. #24
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    I never know what to say or talk about with people, not that I'm shy I just couldn't care less really unless we're talking about something that I enjoy. (And what I enjoy, you can't talk about to people in parties usually) Unless those really whoreish ones, but I don't like them as I am not a real slut, just a wannabe one. Point blank, I am just more an internet socialite.

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