Respect

[dbmmama]

What does it mean to you?

[Sirena]

R-E-S-P-E-C-T find out what it means to me...
(I might come back with an actual response at some point)

[Mediator Kam]

Can't think of an all-encompassing definition right now, but I respect people who have high moral standards and who operate at those high standards. In other words, they practice what they preach.

[dbmmama]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY_8woQ-HEA

thank you so much for that song! i sang the whole thing through with my daughter saying "play it again." and my oldest saying "DON'T YOU DARE! I HATE YOUR MUSIC!" LOL LOL LOL LOL!

[dbmmama]

respect is all i've ever wanted for being myself, whatever it is, however crazy, sane, logical, illogical, rational, irrational, down to earth, head in the clouds.........i happen to be in any given moment of my choosing. i believe i am allowed to be myself as long as i am respecting others in being themselves too as i am.

i believe everyone deserves respect until they prove otherwise, and then, i don't give it back easily or ever again. and the way someone loses my respect is by disrespecting another. yes, irony. but life is full of irony and (what's the word for when two things are going on simultaneously and the opposite of each other?)

while i also believe that as each person deserves respect, i do not like whiners or those that do not at least try to take responsibility for themselves.

[Jimbean]

Aretha Franklin - Respect

[dbmmama]

Aretha Franklin - Respect

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_DZ3_...eature=related

there ya go!!

[Blaze]

respect is not an entitlement. people don't have to respect you. you only get it if you give it and not always even then.

[redbaron]

respect is not an entitlement. people don't have to respect you. you only get it if you give it and not always even then.

isn't that the truth.

[dbmmama]

respect is not an entitlement. people don't have to respect you. you only get it if you give it and not always even then.

yes, i hear ya. but for me understanding that has been a lifelong process. i suppose the main thing i've been "working" on too.

it's still hard because i do still believe that people deserve respect upfront whether they give it back to me or not, i will still respect them first until shown otherwise.

in my parenting, i have always respected my children for the individuals they are, whether i agree with them or not. condescending, talking down to children, disrespecting their opinions and views and likes and dislikes and desires and dreams and and and. theirs are just as legitimate for them as mine are for me or anyone for themselves.

you want to see someone go beserk? dis my child in one of those ways and watch out! total bitch coming your way!

we were watching a baseball game a couple of days ago and this 9 year old girl won a chance to announce the game with the regular announcers. she wrote an essay about why she should announce the game with them.

turns out she was damn good at announcing! she was showing the regular announcer guys up. not in a way that was cocky or she even knew she was doing it. she just was announcing and was damn good at it.

and then it happened. the guys had "hurt butt" that a 9 year old girl was better at their job than them. they started talking to her like she was an idiot, "putting her in her place" so to speak. not a lot, but just enough that i knew. i knew. the disrespect they were showing her, just because she was a kid.

that kind of shit, over time, done to any kid, lowers their self confidence, their self esteem, even if it's subtle, the way it was with them. i fucking see it. i see it everyday, everywhere i go. that condescending bullshit. it makes my blood boil.

that girl was so good at announcing and she even told them she wanted to do that when she grew up. do you think them disrespecting her now was going to help her self confidence in becoming one later? maybe with only a couple of personalities, but not with most kids. kids need respect for being themselves and shining in what they're good at and enjoy in life, whatever it is.

i'm sure you know that sunshinelively. you strike me as the kind of mom that does that for your girls.

rant done, for now.

i started this thread because this is fucking HUGE for me! mutual respect is one of the main things i talk about in my parenting classes...

[Mediator Kam]

i believe everyone deserves respect until they prove otherwise, and then, i don't give it back easily or ever again. and the way someone loses my respect is by disrespecting another.
.

You mean disrespecting another who seems to deserve respect to you?

How do you show someone you respect them?

How would you treat someone who you didn't find worthy of your respect?

Do you think respect is a feeling? Or conscious action? Do you think there are some people (e.g. your parents) who you should respect even when they don't seem worthy of it?

[Jimbean]

yes, i hear ya. but for me understanding that has been a lifelong process. i suppose the main thing i've been "working" on too.

it's still hard because i do still believe that people deserve respect upfront whether they give it back to me or not, i will still respect them first until shown otherwise.

in my parenting, i have always respected my children for the individuals they are, whether i agree with them or not. condescending, talking down to children, disrespecting their opinions and views and likes and dislikes and desires and dreams and and and. theirs are just as legitimate for them as mine are for me or anyone for themselves.

you want to see someone go beserk? dis my child in one of those ways and watch out! total bitch coming your way!

we were watching a baseball game a couple of days ago and this 9 year old girl won a chance to announce the game with the regular announcers. she wrote an essay about why she should announce the game with them.

turns out she was damn good at announcing! she was showing the regular announcer guys up. not in a way that was cocky or she even knew she was doing it. she just was announcing and was damn good at it.

and then it happened. the guys had "hurt butt" that a 9 year old girl was better at their job than them. they started talking to her like she was an idiot, "putting her in her place" so to speak. not a lot, but just enough that i knew. i knew. the disrespect they were showing her, just because she was a kid.

that kind of shit, over time, done to any kid, lowers their self confidence, their self esteem, even if it's subtle, the way it was with them. i fucking see it. i see it everyday, everywhere i go. that condescending bullshit. it makes my blood boil.

that girl was so good at announcing and she even told them she wanted to do that when she grew up. do you think them disrespecting her now was going to help her self confidence in becoming one later? maybe with only a couple of personalities, but not with most kids. kids need respect for being themselves and shining in what they're good at and enjoy in life, whatever it is.

i'm sure you know that sunshinelively. you strike me as the kind of mom that does that for your girls.

rant done, for now.

i started this thread because this is fucking HUGE for me! mutual respect is one of the main things i talk about in my parenting classes...

Let me ask you this, do you like to see or constantly imagining people or things developing in their own way?

[Not A Communist Shill]

Something divulged on a need to know basis usually.

Is a remake of Escape to Victory being planned or something? Should be interesting if ******, Mussolini, Pele, Audrey Hepburn, Genghis Khan, and Beethoven(?) are all going to be playing.

[dbmmama]

You mean disrespecting another who seems to deserve respect to you?

How do you show someone you respect them?

How would you treat someone who you didn't find worthy of your respect?

Do you think respect is a feeling? Or conscious action? Do you think there are some people (e.g. your parents) who you should respect even when they don't seem worthy of it?

interesting questions...

here's something that JUST happened with my daughter, 4 yrs old:

i made a pb and j sandwich for her for breakfast. she normally likes them. she said fine to it. as she was beginning to eat it, she said she didn't like it. i asked her why, what was wrong with it (because she normally likes them). she couldn't quite articulate why. i asked her a couple more questions and figured out that she was just getting tired of peanut butter and needed a change. fine, here's some life cereal. agreed.

i respected that she had a voice, an opinion on her own eating, her own feelings, her own likes and dislikes. we all get sick of eating the same thing over and over again sometimes. that's normal. i did say that try to think ahead a bit next time if she really wants whatever she's gonna eat so we don't waste too much food. but that aspect isn't as important as respecting her desires, to me.

so then, honoring someone's likes, dislikes, opinions, desires, thoughts, feelings, dreams, sentiments, etc...even if i don't agree with them and as long as they do not interfer with another's likes, dislikes, opinions, desires, thoughts, feelings, dreams, sentiments....

is that possible irl, i'm learning as i grow older that it's not very realistic, as much as i try. that's my idealism. i do strive for it though. it's what has gotten me very mad in my early years.

i remember when i went into kindergarten at 5 and cried for 2 days straight because i had never really been away from my mom before. i was already a very clingy child because of either my inner way of seeing the world or because there was a lot violence, abuse, alcoholism going on in my home. if only i was respected that i had this very scared feeling, my mom could have sat with me until i adjusted. i remember other similar instances.

if only my 2nd grade teacher would have believed me when i told her i knew the answer. i argued with her until we both were yelling at each other. open your mind lady to the fact that i could ACTUALLY be telling the fucking truth. i knew she didn't respect me because i was just a kid that she wouldn't open her mind to at least listening to what i had to say and that my view on the world was just as valid as hers.

my mom and i argued like that almost all of the time. at school, i shut down and was a quiet mouse. at home, that anger came out.

i wanted to be a dancer, she said no, no future in it and you're not smart enough to do anything else. i had art talent and i was good with kids, i was to be an artist and possibly a kids' art teacher. i argued but still did what she said. she showed me off like she owned me. and i was dead inside. my own desires were not respected. and i wasn't "strong" enough to go against her anyway, not in that anyway. the rest of my life, i "broke free" at 18 and moved 2000 miles away to get out from under her expectations. i was determined to raise my own kids in a way that respected their desires and dreams. and if anyone tells me otherwise, watch out!

god, should i even hit submit reply, i sound like a lunatic?! LOL oh well.

[dbmmama]

Let me ask you this, do you like to see or constantly imagining people or things developing in their own way?

yes

[Mediator Kam]

so then, honoring someone's likes, dislikes, opinions, desires, thoughts, feelings, dreams, sentiments, etc...even if i don't agree with them and as long as they do not interfer with another's likes, dislikes, opinions, desires, thoughts, feelings, dreams, sentiments....

is that possible irl, i'm learning as i grow older that it's not very realistic, as much as i try. that's my idealism. i do strive for it though. it's what has gotten me very mad in my early years.

I'm wondering then - what type of people you think are not worthy of your respect. Because surely everyone deserves the type of respect you're describing - the right to their own "likes, dislikes, opinions, desires, thoughts, feelings, dreams, sentiments, etc".

[dbmmama]

I'm wondering then - what type of people you think are not worthy of your respect. Because surely everyone deserves the type of respect you're describing - the right to their own "likes, dislikes, opinions, desires, thoughts, feelings, dreams, sentiments, etc".

when someone disrespects another's "right" to be themselves or if someone goes about "being themselves" and they do it in a way that disrespects someone else being themselves or their property or body or their things i listed above.

for instance, my kids are jumping and playing on the bed next to me right now. jump away, have fun. but they are to stop short if they are about to break the whole bed or trip another on purpose so they hurt themselves or tell the other one they are stupid for jumping a "different" way than they do.

i try to instill in my kids to have super fun and respect others as they do. my 4 yr old's ideas of how to play and be and say things are just as valid for her as my 11 year olds as are mine. to tell someone they are "wrong" for being different, or to treat someone as "defective" in some way for being different.

we have been studying WWII and the whole idea of killing others with different beliefs or religions, obviously is the ultimate disrespect. a few months ago we studied the civil war and looked at slavery the same way. i want to instill in my kids an openmind about others being different and respecting them as well as respecting themselves for whoever, however they are as an individual. i'm not a naive pacifist. i believe in nonforce when it comes to a person's potential of who they are, what they like, what they desire, what they feel, what opinions they hold. to tell someone they are wrong for having an opinion different than my own is disrespectful. i try to raise my children to think for themselves.

here's something i just thought of:

the kids and i drove through sonic one day and parked to eat in the car. there were no other cars there at all. as we began to eat, two guys who worked there came out of the place carrying their cigarettes. they were going on their break to smoke. fine, cool. that's your business... BUT, they came and plopped down RIGHT NEXT TO OUR CAR and lit up and the smoke came in our car as we ate.

now, i don't give a shit that they were smoking, smoke all you want, that is your right. it was when they could have easily sat somewhere else, especially with no other cars around, to do it. THAT was disrespectful. i respect their right to smoke, but they did not respect my right as the customer to eat without smoke coming in my window.

the "bitch" in me would have complained right away to the manager. but, i've calmed down a lot about that since i've aged. instead, i drove the car to the other side of the restaurant, relaxed and ate. i've learned more and more to let go of confrontations like that. it's not worth the stress and the guys smoking wouldn't "get" where i was coming from anyway.

that's a very physical thing. i'm that way with things that are nonphysical too. my daughter has a great imagination and i don't respond well when my boys tell her she's stupid for imagining what she does...."you're allowed to see things your way and so is she. you don't have to agree with her, but respect that she is her own person as i do with your way of seeing things."

[Mediator Kam]

when someone disrespects another's "right" to be themselves or if someone goes about "being themselves" and they do it in a way that disrespects someone else being themselves or their property or body or their things i listed above.

for instance, my kids are jumping and playing on the bed next to me right now. jump away, have fun. but they are to stop short if they are about to break the whole bed or trip another on purpose so they hurt themselves or tell the other one they are stupid for jumping a "different" way than they do.

i try to instill in my kids to have super fun and respect others as they do. my 4 yr old's ideas of how to play and be and say things are just as valid for her as my 11 year olds as are mine. to tell someone they are "wrong" for being different, or to treat someone as "defective" in some way for being different.

we have been studying WWII and the whole idea of killing others with different beliefs or religions, obviously is the ultimate disrespect. a few months ago we studied the civil war and looked at slavery the same way. i want to instill in my kids an openmind about others being different and respecting them as well as respecting themselves for whoever, however they are as an individual. i'm not a naive pacifist. i believe in nonforce when it comes to a person's potential of who they are, what they like, what they desire, what they feel, what opinions they hold. to tell someone they are wrong for having an opinion different than my own is disrespectful. i try to raise my children to think for themselves.

here's something i just thought of:

the kids and i drove through sonic one day and parked to eat in the car. there were no other cars there at all. as we began to eat, two guys who worked there came out of the place carrying their cigarettes. they were going on their break to smoke. fine, cool. that's your business... BUT, they came and plopped down RIGHT NEXT TO OUR CAR and lit up and the smoke came in our car as we ate.

now, i don't give a shit that they were smoking, smoke all you want, that is your right. it was when they could have easily sat somewhere else, especially with no other cars around, to do it. THAT was disrespectful. i respect their right to smoke, but they did not respect my right as the customer to eat without smoke coming in my window.

the "bitch" in me would have complained right away to the manager. but, i've calmed down a lot about that since i've aged. instead, i drove the car to the other side of the restaurant, relaxed and ate. i've learned more and more to let go of confrontations like that. it's not worth the stress and the guys smoking wouldn't "get" where i was coming from anyway.

that's a very physical thing. i'm that way with things that are nonphysical too. my daughter has a great imagination and i don't respond well when my boys tell her she's stupid for imagining what she does...."you're allowed to see things your way and so is she. you don't have to agree with her, but respect that she is her own person as i do with your way of seeing things."

It's impossible to go through life not 'disrespecting' someone's wishes at some point or treading on someone's toes in some way - just by being who you are. When it comes down to a choice btwn your own and another person's wishes (which it does every day), whose are you going to choose? If you give into the person, you're disrespecting yourself. If you ignore the other person's wishes, you're disrespecting them - by your definition. The system would only work if our wishes never clashed with other people's wishes. You have to utilise a system of morality, far more complex than just 'respect for all', in order to function in a way that makes sense.

Sure, everyone's entitled to their own opinions and feelings and so forth, but I can't respect opinions that I think are stupid. You respect ideas or people that you hold in high estimation.

I think we can be too busy 'respecting' everyone and end up just being a wishy-washy person who no one respects.

[dbmmama]

It's impossible to go through life not 'disrespecting' someone's wishes at some point or treading on someone's toes in some way - just by being who you are. When it comes down to a choice btwn your own and another person's wishes (which it does every day), whose are you going to choose? If you give into the person, you're disrespecting yourself. If you ignore the other person's wishes, you're disrespecting them - by your definition. The system would only work if our wishes never clashed with other people's wishes. You have to utilise a system of morality, far more complex than just 'respect for all', in order to function in a way that makes sense.

Sure, everyone's entitled to their own opinions and feelings and so forth, but I can't respect opinions that I think are stupid. You respect ideas or people that you hold in high estimation.

I think we can be too busy 'respecting' everyone and end up just being a wishy-washy person who no one respects.

are you my duel that just gave me the kick in the ass i needed?

[dbmmama]

It's impossible to go through life not 'disrespecting' someone's wishes at some point or treading on someone's toes in some way - just by being who you are. When it comes down to a choice btwn your own and another person's wishes (which it does every day), whose are you going to choose? If you give into the person, you're disrespecting yourself. If you ignore the other person's wishes, you're disrespecting them - by your definition. The system would only work if our wishes never clashed with other people's wishes. You have to utilise a system of morality, far more complex than just 'respect for all', in order to function in a way that makes sense.

Sure, everyone's entitled to their own opinions and feelings and so forth, but I can't respect opinions that I think are stupid. You respect ideas or people that you hold in high estimation.

I think we can be too busy 'respecting' everyone and end up just being a wishy-washy person who no one respects.

what has actually happened in my life is that i don't have many people that like me when i'm actually "being myself" and that is scary inside to feel so alone. so i went the opposite extreme and became kinda wishy washy like you say, which doesn't feel good AT ALL. i want to know my type to kinda give me permission to come out of my shell and be ok with that "weirdo, crazy" me that i know i am. and be ok that a lot of people will probably not like me then too.

i am "myself" with my hubby. i feel safe with him to be it. he doesn't understand at all why i'm even trying to figure this out. he likes and thinks i'm cool being me, he just wishes i'd shut up about this stuff and just be myself all of the time, no matter if others like me or not.

i feel like i just need to start over.

one problem is that i'm so crazy that most of the moms i know and are in my homeschooling groups ALREADY think i'm crazy AND THEY HAVEN'T SEEN HOW MUCH I COULD LET IT ALL OUT!

[Mediator Kam]

what has actually happened in my life is that i don't have many people that like me when i'm actually "being myself" and that is scary inside to feel so alone. so i went the opposite extreme and became kinda wishy washy like you say, which doesn't feel good AT ALL. i want to know my type to kinda give me permission to come out of my shell and be ok with that "weirdo, crazy" me that i know i am. and be ok that a lot of people will probably not like me then too.

i am "myself" with my hubby. i feel safe with him to be it. he doesn't understand at all why i'm even trying to figure this out. he likes and thinks i'm cool being me, he just wishes i'd shut up about this stuff and just be myself all of the time, no matter if others like me or not.

i feel like i just need to start over.

one problem is that i'm so crazy that most of the moms i know and are in my homeschooling groups ALREADY think i'm crazy AND THEY HAVEN'T SEEN HOW MUCH I COULD LET IT ALL OUT!

How would you describe the person you'd be if you did just LET IT ALL OUT?

Just curious - are you as smiley in real life as your posts make you out to be?

[redbaron]

what has actually happened in my life is that i don't have many people that like me when i'm actually "being myself" and that is scary inside to feel so alone. so i went the opposite extreme and became kinda wishy washy like you say, which doesn't feel good AT ALL. i want to know my type to kinda give me permission to come out of my shell and be ok with that "weirdo, crazy" me that i know i am. and be ok that a lot of people will probably not like me then too.

i am "myself" with my hubby. i feel safe with him to be it. he doesn't understand at all why i'm even trying to figure this out. he likes and thinks i'm cool being me, he just wishes i'd shut up about this stuff and just be myself all of the time, no matter if others like me or not.

i feel like i just need to start over.

one problem is that i'm so crazy that most of the moms i know and are in my homeschooling groups ALREADY think i'm crazy AND THEY HAVEN'T SEEN HOW MUCH I COULD LET IT ALL OUT!

awww, I think you sound GREAT. One of my best friends from college is EIE and also feels this way. I love it when she's herself. But she knows that letting it all out can alienate some people. Is there any way of meeting some new moms? And are you sure they all think you're crazy? Maybe they're just jealous of your bounding energy!

[dbmmama]

How would you describe the person you'd be if you did just LET IT ALL OUT?

Just curious - are you as smiley in real life as your posts make you out to be?

i appreciate your asking...

the thing is, is that i've held back from letting it out for so long....

with the atmosphere of my early childhood being one of abuse (not to me necessarily, but dad to mom) and alcoholism, etc...the "real world" was a scary place. why is everyone acting so weird? why? why? why do i have to be so afraid all of the time?

and then it made me mad that i was put into a situation/family where people were so fucked up. when i was clearly scared of something, my dad thought it was funny and pushed me into even further, which got me more withdrawn and scared....and yet, he was my "prince" that gave me whatever i wanted otherwise.

and at the same time, i was watching it all unfold like an eagle up above. and i said to myself, never, never, ever will i do this to my child, never. i will become a mom and be the best mom ever, EVER i tell you! so, i did SO MUCH to learn and learn and learn and figure out and figure out everything about child development, education, learning styles, on and on and on and on. and i was determined to DO IT all not just read about it. oh fuck yeah, get out of my way! and much of what i do do is very nonmainstream looking at things.

if all of that didn't happen, the main thing that pops in my head is that i would dance. dance, sing, create, joke, laugh, be in the moment, allowing life to unfold. there wouldn't be a chip on my shoulder... and i'd smile more, more naturally. i have to force a real smile on my face. and that sucks.

but when i do allow and am in the moment, pure joy, pure heaven....i don't have to fight anything, it all flows.

like yesterday, i was in the grocery store with my two girls and we're getting some fruit and i start singing about bananas, bananramas, ramadamas, ding dong ramas, bananas.....playing, having fun, being silly, dancing in the aisles, knowing everything is ok and will be ok. i play in the moment. that is me, down to earth, playing in the moment and yet calmly in charge of what we're doing, talking and joking confidently with other people we come across. i'm the mom that pushes the grocery cart out to the car very fast and jumps on for the ride.........wheeeeeee!!!!!!! and my girls yell and scream in delight!

i'm not necessarily smiley but playful. i think there's a difference.

[Mediator Kam]

i appreciate your asking...

the thing is, is that i've held back from letting it out for so long....

with the atmosphere of my early childhood being one of abuse (not to me necessarily, but dad to mom) and alcoholism, etc...the "real world" was a scary place. why is everyone acting so weird? why? why? why do i have to be so afraid all of the time?

and then it made me mad that i was put into a situation/family where people were so fucked up. when i was clearly scared of something, my dad thought it was funny and pushed me into even further, which got me more withdrawn and scared....and yet, he was my "prince" that gave me whatever i wanted otherwise.

and at the same time, i was watching it all unfold like an eagle up above. and i said to myself, never, never, ever will i do this to my child, never. i will become a mom and be the best mom ever, EVER i tell you! so, i did SO MUCH to learn and learn and learn and figure out and figure out everything about child development, education, learning styles, on and on and on and on. and i was determined to DO IT all not just read about it. oh fuck yeah, get out of my way! and much of what i do do is very nonmainstream looking at things.

if all of that didn't happen, the main thing that pops in my head is that i would dance. dance, sing, create, joke, laugh, be in the moment, allowing life to unfold. there wouldn't be a chip on my shoulder... and i'd smile more, more naturally. i have to force a real smile on my face. and that sucks.

but when i do allow and am in the moment, pure joy, pure heaven....i don't have to fight anything, it all flows.

like yesterday, i was in the grocery store with my two girls and we're getting some fruit and i start singing about bananas, bananramas, ramadamas, ding dong ramas, bananas.....playing, having fun, being silly, dancing in the aisles, knowing everything is ok and will be ok. i play in the moment. that is me, down to earth, playing in the moment and yet calmly in charge of what we're doing, talking and joking confidently with other people we come across. i'm the mom that pushes the grocery cart out to the car very fast and jumps on for the ride.........wheeeeeee!!!!!!! and my girls yell and scream in delight!

i'm not necessarily smiley but playful. i think there's a difference.

You know, I think your initial typing was correct - EIE. You remind me of an ENFj friend of mind.

You sound like an awesome mother. Like redbaron said, some of the other homeschooling moms are probably just jealous of all your energy, or they don't value Fe. But yeah, you can't please everyone. If you try to, you'll just end up stressing yourself out and not succeeding anyway. The main thing is that you are a proactive and loving mother to your kids. That's fantastic. <3

[dbmmama]

You know, I think your initial typing was correct - EIE. You remind me of an ENFj friend of mind.

You sound like an awesome mother. Like redbaron said, some of the other homeschooling moms are probably just jealous of all your energy, or they don't value Fe. But yeah, you can't please everyone. If you try to, you'll just end up stressing yourself out and not succeeding anyway. The main thing is that you are a proactive and loving mother to your kids. That's fantastic. <3

you have no idea how much this means to me....thank you.

[calenwen]

one problem is that i'm so crazy that most of the moms i know and are in my homeschooling groups ALREADY think i'm crazy AND THEY HAVEN'T SEEN HOW MUCH I COULD LET IT ALL OUT!

Oh my gosh! I didn't know you were homeschooling your kids - that's so awesome! My mom homeschooled me and she is still homeschooling my two younger sisters. At the time I didn't appreciate how much energy and dedication it took, but now I am so thankful for all the extra time that she put into my upbringing. Because of her I was able to start college three years early and skip all of that awful high school drama.
My mom is totally crazy, too. Like, it was embarrassing sometimes but now it's just funny. She's just really hardcore about everything she does, which I think is why she chose to homeschool us - she thought she could do a better job than the public school system.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that you rock for caring enough about your kids to do that and they will appreciate it sooo much someday!

[redbaron]

Oh my gosh! I didn't know you were homeschooling your kids - that's so awesome! My mom homeschooled me and she is still homeschooling my two younger sisters. At the time I didn't appreciate how much energy and dedication it took, but now I am so thankful for all the extra time that she put into my upbringing. Because of her I was able to start college three years early and skip all of that awful high school drama.
My mom is totally crazy, too. Like, it was embarrassing sometimes but now it's just funny. She's just really hardcore about everything she does, which I think is why she chose to homeschool us - she thought she could do a better job than the public school system.
Anyway, I just wanted to say that you rock for caring enough about your kids to do that and they will appreciate it sooo much someday!

Yup. Moms like that DO do a better job than the public school system. I think that kind of education is really neat. It just requires the right sort of person.

[calenwen]

Yup. Moms like that DO do a better job than the public school system. I think that kind of education is really neat. It just requires the right sort of person.

I agree.
And yes, you need a special sort of strength. I can't imagine myself ever doing it, as much as I might want to.

[redbaron]

I agree.
And yes, you need a special sort of strength. I can't imagine myself ever doing it, as much as I might want to.

Me either That's okay--we're good at different stuff.

[Blaze]

Dear Miss Manners —A group of friends and I are having a discussion regarding good manners and respect. My view is that respect comes from understanding and having good manners, whereas it is being put to me that good manners and respect are two distinctly separate things that can be had one without the other. We would be very interested in learning your thoughts on the matter, and I would consider them to be the final word on the subject.
Gentle Reader — Promising Miss Manners that her word will be the final one, even before you have heard it — now that is respect. She thanks you.
Yet she admits that the term “respect” is rather loosely used in the manners business. This leads to the sort of argument in which a parent says, “You have to show more respect for Granny,” and the child replies, “Why, since she just got out of jail for petty larceny?”
The sort of respect to which the parent is referring is a part of good manners. It means exhibiting consideration toward everyone and showing special deference to those who are older or in a position of authority.
But the child hears the word to mean the genuine admiration felt for someone who has proved himself to be worthy of it. That sort of respect is, indeed, a thing apart, which etiquette cannot mandate.
Manners require only that people show respect, although with the secret hope that the outward form will become internalized. What people feel as they size up individuals is up to them.

found this in the paper today and thought of this thread...that miss manners, she's got it goin on.

[dbmmama]

found this in the paper today and thought of this thread...that miss manners, she's got it goin on.

exactly...

[dbmmama]

Swinging on the clothes line is fun too.

or jumping off the roof into the swimming pool but don't give my kids those ideas!! wait, they think of those on their own!