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Thread: Help! What's my type?

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    Default Help! What's my type?

    I can't express everything well in this post because I barely had any sleep the past few days and my thinking is incoherent.. But anyway, I've been wondering the past few days whether I've typed myself right. Certain Things came up that made me question it.
    I'm sure that I'm either EII or IEE but I need your help to decide which one it is.

    So I'll tell you what made me rethink things.
    First of all I have an intj friend and if I'm really an infj we should have look alike relations which are pretty comfortable but when I thought of it I realized that's not really the case. I have an infj friend and they (the intj and infj) get along very nicely while I don't get along with her well at all (with the intj). It feels like she's stifling me and I feel like I can't act freely when I'm around her because she always has some condescending comment to give me. Basically I hate her and she's not the least bit threatened by me. Ever since I knew her things were like this but we always seemed to be "good friends" at least in the most superficial way.. Though she always made me feel like a stupid imbecile in this "friendship".
    Also if you think about it, if I'm the infj Ne subtype, I'm supposed to be even closer to being an intj….

    Second thing that makes me unsure is that if I compare myself to my EII friend and she's a stereotypical one and we have some real differences. She's much more delicate than I am, much more afraid of any sort of confrontation (I dislike them but if I have to I'll try to deal with them) and much more introverted… We don't achieve complete consensus in our opinions and we used to have a lot of arguments because each of us has emphasis on slightly different areas. Nevertheless we get along well and have long conversations together that can be nice because we're likeminded but also wear off after a while. (That just sounded like I copied the description of mirror relations so maybe I'm brainwashed or something...)

    I can give you much more information if you want but if I continue this will become way too long and nobody will want to read this. Please help me!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheesy View Post
    (That just sounded like I copied the description of mirror relations so maybe I'm brainwashed or something...)
    haha I was actually thinking that, but its good that you're aware of the possibility

    you've given a lot of reasons against INFj but it would be cool if you explained why you initially believed you were one?

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    Quote Originally Posted by hellothere View Post

    you've given a lot of reasons against INFj but it would be cool if you explained why you initially believed you were one?
    Yeah, that's a very good point.
    I think that due to my life circumstances it would be ridiculous for me to think that I was an extrovert. My mom is an ISTJ (we have a horrible relationship) and I think that shaped my conception of myself and suppressed my personality quite a lot.

    I always thought of myself as an introvert because my house was like this jail where I couldn't have any fun and for the past few years I was quite miserable because I always felt like I couldn't express myself fully with people and be me. I think that is because I was so used to not being myself all the time. I think that a lot of my natural sociability was suppressed because of my upbringing because today after a lot of healing I surprise myself with my behavior. I think I just may be an example of how upbringing can change things... Honestly, I'm sick of wondering about this because it shouldn't matter and I wish I could just leave all of these things behind me and be whoever it is that I am. But I guess I can't do that right now. I'm really confused and truth is that I can give you reasons both for ENFP and for INFJ... Maybe lately I've just changed or bloomed or something and maybe that's why I'm wondering..

    This post just made me depressed..I need to take a nap

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    You can't be in doubt about EII or IEE. It doesn't make sense. It is VERY easy to determine which of those two types you are (if you really are one of them and not another type). You only have to look at the four dichotomies. You simply must be able to determine at least 3 out of 4 dichotomies.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Phaedrus View Post
    You can't be in doubt about EII or IEE. It doesn't make sense. It is VERY easy to determine which of those two types you are (if you really are one of them and not another type). You only have to look at the four dichotomies. You simply must be able to determine at least 3 out of 4 dichotomies.
    By the 4 dichotomies do you mean Extraversion/Introversion and so on?
    If so then I can say that my room is a mess (P), I like to interact with people (E) and so on.. That still doesn't determine much because as I said I can give examples to every perspective.

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    your relation with your intj friend sounds like supervision, which would make you IEE over EII.

    also temperaments can help. there's a huge difference between IJ temperament and EP temperament, so phaedrus is actually correct in this instance. take a look at the temperaments. EP is all impulsive and inconsistent with their energy and IJ is all slow and sleady wins the race.

    which one are you?

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheesy View Post
    By the 4 dichotomies do you mean Extraversion/Introversion and so on?
    If so then I can say that my room is a mess (P), I like to interact with people (E) and so on.. That still doesn't determine much because as I said I can give examples to every perspective.
    So you identify with Extraversion (E), Intuition (N), Ethics (F), and Irrationality (p)? In that case you cannot be an EII.

    Also, when you said that you've "always thought of myself as an introvert because my house was like this jail where I couldn't have any fun and for the past few years I was quite miserable because I always felt like I couldn't express myself fully with people and be me" you are expressing a typical extraverted attitude. I would say that you certainly come across as an extravert when you say things like that. The key parts that suggest extraversion are put in bold.

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    it sounds to me like you're describing, pretty accurately, the IEE / LII relationship from the perspective of IEE
    INTp

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunshine Lively View Post
    your relation with your intj friend sounds like supervision, which would make you IEE over EII.

    also temperaments can help. there's a huge difference between IJ temperament and EP temperament, so phaedrus is actually correct in this instance. take a look at the temperaments. EP is all impulsive and inconsistent with their energy and IJ is all slow and sleady wins the race.

    which one are you?

    My feeling is that I'm so aware of the whole thing that it's impossible for me to be objective about it.
    I have to say that I feel like a chameleon (for a lack of a better word), always changing myself in situations to adapt myself to how I should be according to socionics.
    I'll give you an example, a couple of days ago I was thinking "I want to be an ENFP because it's so much better so let's do what an ENFP would do" or alternatively when I was thinking that I was an INFJ then I was doing what that type would be doing. I know how messed up that is, nevertheless it makes me unable to take an objective look at what's really hiding under all of that b.s.

    And maybe my INTJ "friend" is just a really nasty person, I have another friend that hates her and they have activity relations.. And she's such an IJ temperament, she's slow and steady (calculated and heartless )

    As for your question - I can be impulsive and lately I just want to explore new things and I don't know if slow and steady is the word to describe me these days, it could be though... All I can say is that my perception alters reality.
    This leads me to one thing, has anyone come up with a rehabilitation center to free your mind from socionics? This is all because of it!


    Quote Originally Posted by Phaedrus View Post
    So you identify with Extraversion (E), Intuition (N), Ethics (F), and Irrationality (p)? In that case you cannot be an EII.

    Also, when you said that you've "always thought of myself as an introvert because my house was like this jail where I couldn't have any fun and for the past few years I was quite miserable because I always felt like I couldn't express myself fully with people and be me" you are expressing a typical extraverted attitude. I would say that you certainly come across as an extravert when you say things like that. The key parts that suggest extraversion are put in bold.
    I was waiting for someone to do that... I mean, I can't possibly argue with that, my type has finally been scientifically proven!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Phaedrus View Post
    So you identify with Extraversion (E), Intuition (N), Ethics (F), and Irrationality (p)? In that case you cannot be an EII.

    Also, when you said that you've "always thought of myself as an introvert because my house was like this jail where I couldn't have any fun and for the past few years I was quite miserable because I always felt like I couldn't express myself fully with people and be me" you are expressing a typical extraverted attitude. I would say that you certainly come across as an extravert when you say things like that. The key parts that suggest extraversion are put in bold.
    Lol. No, that's stupid. Any type can feel like that if someone else's values are being pushed on them. I felt like that growing up.
    "Language is the Rubicon that divides man from beast."

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jem View Post
    Lol. No, that's stupid. Any type can feel like that if someone else's values are being pushed on them. I felt like that growing up.
    What you feel and what you really are are two different things. My argument is good regardless of whether Cheesy has a correct or an incorrect self-image.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Phaedrus View Post
    What you feel and what you really are are two different things. My argument is good regardless of whether Cheesy has a correct or an incorrect self-image.
    She (?) was expressing how she felt growing up. How can her feelings be incorrect? That's ridiculous. Oh excuse me while I check to see whether it's correct to feel this way.

    Your argument isn't good at all if you misinterpreted what she wrote.
    "Language is the Rubicon that divides man from beast."

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jem View Post
    She (?) was expressing how she felt growing up. How can her feelings be incorrect? That's ridiculous. Oh excuse me while I check to see whether it's correct to feel this way.

    Your argument isn't good at all if you misinterpreted what she wrote.
    Now you made me want to rant about my childhood. Thank god I had an aunt who took care of all those attention whore needs that I never got from my mom. Looking at pictures from my childhood I was always in some weird/unconventional pose and I remember that no one responded to those gestures (someone even told me to stop doing it. I was deeply hurt because again, someone told me to stop being me) and I think that I slowly became withdrawn. It could be that my mom slowly ruined my true self and sent it to the underground until those ugly teenage years came and I rebelled, realizing I'm never quite myself.
    I still don't think that necessarily means I'm ENFP I guess people can be whatever they want to be whenever they want…

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheesy View Post
    Now you made me want to rant about my childhood. Thank god I had an aunt who took care of all those attention whore needs that I never got from my mom. Looking at pictures from my childhood I was always in some weird/unconventional pose and I remember that no one responded to those gestures (someone even told me to stop doing it. I was deeply hurt because again, someone told me to stop being me) and I think that I slowly became withdrawn. It could be that my mom slowly ruined my true self and sent it to the underground until those ugly teenage years came and I rebelled, realizing I'm never quite myself.
    I still don't think that necessarily means I'm ENFP I guess people can be whatever they want to be whenever they want…
    do you know your mom's type?

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunshine Lively View Post
    do you know your mom's type?
    ISTJ.

    In any way, thanks for everyone who helped, I appreciate your time and attention.. Hopefully I'll reach a stage in my life that categorizing myself (and others) is not something that I care to do and will just discard this theory and all other theories that try do divide people into types. In such theories there's not much place for being who you really are and that's pretty ironic taking into account what the intention of this theory was. These things are set out to help people find themselves but really you just lose yourself into another prison of categories and grotesque generalizations meanwhile all the uniqueness and wonder in life simply fades away. It's just a way to minimize people into a small box and I admit that it's convenient sometimes but eventually has a real price - the price of the magic there is in life (is that Role function or PoLR?..... and I think I smelled some in there too....)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheesy View Post
    ISTJ.

    In any way, thanks for everyone who helped, I appreciate your time and attention.. Hopefully I'll reach a stage in my life that categorizing myself (and others) is not something that I care to do and will just discard this theory and all other theories that try do divide people into types. In such theories there's not much place for being who you really are and that's pretty ironic taking into account what the intention of this theory was. These things are set out to help people find themselves but really you just lose yourself into another prison of categories and grotesque generalizations meanwhile all the uniqueness and wonder in life simply fades away. It's just a way to minimize people into a small box and I admit that it's convenient sometimes but eventually has a real price - the price of the magic there is in life (is that Role function or PoLR?..... and I think I smelled some in there too....)
    i'm on your wavelength cheesy. let's just go and be magical together and call that our type.

    and i felt the same exact way when i was growing up. and now i'm still trying to find "me" in all the mess that happened in my childhood.

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    dbmmama, whatever type you are, you're awesome and you know it.

    I have to say that I spent a few hours with my mom today because I had to and that really made me think that I'm an ENFP that just grew up with an ISTJ mom and that caused some problems. I still don't know because I can see myself as both types but the infj doesn't feel like it covers my personality, there's a certain edge to me that the INFJ type doesn't account for (is that related to individual differences or is it type related?). When I read the Gulenko type description of the infj it seemed a little contrived when I tried to fit into it and my friend thought that I might be a thinking type instead (which is absurd) and another friend said there are some stuff that are true. I just feel like that description is dead on for my EII friend and is not as dead on for me.

    Is there any chance that I'm somewhere in between those types? Or that I am who I am because I had a mom that made it difficult for me to be me? Or in other words that there's a possibility that because I grew up with an istj mom she helped shape my personality (that conflicted with hers) into something less defined?

    I still need your help so come back here all you really nice and smart people of this forum!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cheesy View Post
    dbmmama, whatever type you are, you're awesome and you know it.

    I have to say that I spent a few hours with my mom today because I had to and that really made me think that I'm an ENFP that just grew up with an ISTJ mom and that caused some problems. I still don't know because I can see myself as both types but the infj doesn't feel like it covers my personality, there's a certain edge to me that the INFJ type doesn't account for (is that related to individual differences or is it type related?). When I read the Gulenko type description of the infj it seemed a little contrived when I tried to fit into it and my friend thought that I might be a thinking type instead (which is absurd) and another friend said there are some stuff that are true. I just feel like that description is dead on for my EII friend and is not as dead on for me.

    Is there any chance that I'm somewhere in between those types? Or that I am who I am because I had a mom that made it difficult for me to be me? Or in other words that there's a possibility that because I grew up with an istj mom she helped shape my personality (that conflicted with hers) into something less defined?

    I still need your help so come back here all you really nice and smart people of this forum!
    you are so funny cheesy! and thanks.

    i hear ya about reading the EII descripton and thinking "but i've got this edge that they don't mention." and even thinking i was a logical because of it.

    i don't have anything to add for ya, sorry. but, i'm with ya!!!

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