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Thread: Si vs Se

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    aka-kitsune's Avatar
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    Default Si vs. Se

    In my mind lately, I've noticed myself making quick shorthand use of a bunch of information process "preferences", ie: Si>Se, and attempting to associate them with traits in myself and others.

    For specific example: I believe I probably > .

    I *really* dislike physical activity most of the time. I can be very inert. Have to drag myself to the gym each time, have trouble feeling "grounded" in my own body. Imposing myself physically on my environment feels uncomfortable, alien, uncertain. Whenever I try to focus my attention on my muscles, movements, breathing, I'm inevitably squirming to get back into my mind-mode of constant introspection. While I certainly admire people who can train themselves and hone their bodies into effective machines, I don't have the self-discipline to overcome my innate resistance.

    On the other hand, I love physical sensation. Perception of texture is one of my special delights. Often, I can't help but touch things. When I was a child going with my mother to the supermarket and we'd pass through the aisle with the meat cases, I'd instinctively have to press my finger against the packages. Squishy, plastic-y, interesting sensation.

    Caught myself doing this the other day at the counter in a convenience store. Marshmallow Peeps.

    Can't help it! I love the feeling of water on my skin, the fluidity of water and other liquids, I touch fabrics in clothing stores automatically. I'm also very sensitive to smells, fabric textures, loud disturbing sounds (esp obnoxiously loud people), interesting shades of color, buy books sometimes based entirely on shape and cover texture. Temperature is also a big focus. Bracing chills on my face, warm sun on my hands, steamy water in the shower.

    I guess I've always just thought of it as my particular "Princess and the Pea" syndrome. Lately, I'm thinking it may be correlated to information metabolism.

    Anyway... now that I've revealed lots of my odd sensory quirks (and there are many more)... I'd like to know... Is this a good example of difference btw element pairs? Does this sound (in)consistent with IEI or is this more of an individual issue? What do you think? Hmm?
    socio: INFp - IEI
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    ...been here longer than the fucking monarchy Ezra's Avatar
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    I say versus see.

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    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune View Post
    Is this a good example of difference btw element pairs? Does this sound (in)consistent with IEI or is this more of an individual issue? What do you think? Hmm?
    I don't think feeling uncomfortable with too much physical exertion and liking stimulation from various sensations necessarily contradicts IEI.

    Liking things like the feeling of the warm sun, etc., doesn't necessarily indicate strong or even quadra. It depends more on what one does with that stimulation and how central it is to one's persona.

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    What Jonathan said.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    ...been here longer than the fucking monarchy Ezra's Avatar
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    Just a question, AK. If you are an IEI, why Si > Se?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ezra View Post
    Just a question, AK. If you are an IEI, why Si > Se?
    Just like it better, apparently.
    socio: INFp - IEI
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    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune View Post
    Just like it better, apparently.
    I 'm afraid I can't say the same about Ni over Ne.
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    Twist-Tie Spider iAnnAu's Avatar
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    I have a kind of "princess & the pea" syndrome, too.
    I can't stand to wear jewelry or makeup or shave my legs ... several of my ex-boyfriends have had a problem with this because they mistake it for unfeminine. But the sensations these things create make me uncomfortable in my own skin - for example, within a few hours of shaving, I can *feel* the hairs *under* the skin. Imagine that sensation, all over the lower half of your body! Unacceptable.
    My solution is to not bother with these things. Through the years I've made stabs at wearing different kinds of metals, using just a little bit of natural-based makeup, plus trying depliatories, waxing and even electrolysis. All of it has met with epic fail. People call me hippie, which is patently absurd, but I don't bother to correct them because if I cared that much about what they thought, I would probably go through the discomfort of making myself look more mainstream.
    For the record, there's nothing inherently feminine in any of the three examples I've mentioned - in fact, I've been with two guys, one Vietnamese and one American Indian, who grew almost no body hair: does that make *them* feminine? Bullshit.
    Quote Originally Posted by Charles Bukowski
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    i don't think this is type related necessarily. I think Si is really the 'lifestyle' function, people really attuned to how they spend their days, what they eat, how they t ake care of themselves, doing things they enjoy, etc etc.

    also
    stop touching everything--this is how infections are spread.
    asd

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    Quote Originally Posted by iAnnAu View Post
    I have a kind of "princess & the pea" syndrome, too.
    I can't stand to wear jewelry or makeup or shave my legs ... several of my ex-boyfriends have had a problem with this because they mistake it for unfeminine. But the sensations these things create make me uncomfortable in my own skin - for example, within a few hours of shaving, I can *feel* the hairs *under* the skin. Imagine that sensation, all over the lower half of your body! Unacceptable.
    My solution is to not bother with these things. Through the years I've made stabs at wearing different kinds of metals, using just a little bit of natural-based makeup, plus trying depliatories, waxing and even electrolysis. All of it has met with epic fail. People call me hippie, which is patently absurd, but I don't bother to correct them because if I cared that much about what they thought, I would probably go through the discomfort of making myself look more mainstream.
    For the record, there's nothing inherently feminine in any of the three examples I've mentioned - in fact, I've been with two guys, one Vietnamese and one American Indian, who grew almost no body hair: does that make *them* feminine? Bullshit.
    i can relate to that. i think your ideal guy should like you even if you don't do this. if he only likes you because you conform to standard ideals of feminine beauty, he probably sucks anyhow. i don't know, i can't date guys who do this to me. at any rate i feel stupid & unnatural wearing too much makeup or "fixing" myself incessantly.
    Last edited by implied; 03-19-2008 at 09:13 AM.
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    real nice avatar implied
    “Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    You've done yourself a huge favor developmentally by mustering the balls to do something really fucking scary... in about the most vulnerable situation possible.

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    +1 to you who like my av. <3
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    i agree with you and implied, but consider the possibility that the guy simply hates the feel of hair rubbing against his body much like you hate the feeling hair buried under your leg or whatever.
    asd

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    Hmm.. you have a point there. I would also add something meaningful here but alas I can think of nowt. My apologies.
    ILI (Indescribable Lovemaking Inc.)
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    Quote Originally Posted by heath View Post
    i agree with you and implied, but consider the possibility that the guy simply hates the feel of hair rubbing against his body much like you hate the feeling hair buried under your leg or whatever.
    yeah i think smooth legs def feel better. the hassle is that they are only smooth for like 1 day. the next day they're back to being like sandpaper. and if you shave too many days in a row you get razor burn and it looks like shit.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by dolphin View Post
    I'm not sure if you meant to make a blanket statement.... but for some reason, my immediate reactions was sort of pissed off...like, how do you know if these people are "shallow"? Who are you to judge them, anyway? You're not them, you don't know what's going on in their minds.....you're not taking into account their fears, insecurities, happinesses, and everything else that makes them a complex human being. So what if they appear shallow to you? Peope are many layered, complex.....They're not something to be labeled as "shallow".

    Sorry about the rant.... But I was wondering if this had anything to do with quadra differences? Like, to get along with a conflicting quadra you have to sort of stifle your gut reactions?
    It wasn't intended as a blanket statement, although looking back on it I can see how it comes across as that. I'm not certain but I wonder if that (i.e. my statement) is a manifestation of Fe-PoLR, i.e. a lack of awareness of the emotional impact of one's words. Add Fi super-id into the mix (I'm thinking one aspect of Fi super-id covering Fe super-ego is that by building relationships with others, one wouldn't have to worry about the Fe aspects of their behaviour since the static Fi bond would take priority over the dynamic Fe...I don't know which word would best fit Fe in this context). I also wonder if there's de-valued Ne (not considering pretty much everything you listed there.. I think I once heard something about Ne.. or at least Ne with Fi, considering things like what factors make someone what they are.. factors such as what you listed above). That and nearly everything I say (including what comes across as blanket statements like that) is speculation (which is often why I write things such as "Bah I dunno, I'm just rambling." at the end of my posts.. because to me, that's all it is, just rambling. It's not something I hold any weight to, although I do wonder if, purely unintentionally, it comes across as more weighty or forceful than I really intend it).

    Please don't hate me, I meant you no harm. I'll remove the post if you prefer. In fact, I think I'll do that anyway, I don't want someone else coming along, not reading this discussion and starting the whole thing off again.
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    Quote Originally Posted by heath View Post
    i agree with you and implied, but consider the possibility that the guy simply hates the feel of hair rubbing against his body much like you hate the feeling hair buried under your leg or whatever.
    that's something entirely different, i think.
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    Quote Originally Posted by implied View Post
    that's something entirely different, i think.
    sure, but it was never stated why the guy insisted upon shaved legs only assumed that it was related to societal standards of beauty.
    asd

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    Quote Originally Posted by heath View Post
    sure, but it was never stated why the guy insisted upon shaved legs only assumed that it was related to societal standards of beauty.
    yes, but i'd trust if it bothered a guy this much, he'd say, "hey, your legs are absolutely scraping me to pieces." whereas, i think a guy concerned with societal standards of beauty might pick something else to say, yeah?
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    Quote Originally Posted by implied View Post
    yes, but i'd trust if it bothered a guy this much, he'd say, "hey, your legs are absolutely scraping me to pieces." whereas, i think a guy concerned with societal standards of beauty might pick something else to say, yeah?
    yeah but the guy never said anything at all besides saying he didn't like it as far as we know.

    I don't think people who are overly concerned with societal standards of beauty date people who aren't, in my observation.
    asd

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    Quote Originally Posted by heath View Post
    yeah but the guy never said anything at all besides saying he didn't like it as far as we know.

    I don't think people who are overly concerned with societal standards of beauty date people who aren't, in my observation.
    maybe. depends on how much the person wants to change you, yeah? at least that's my observation. but i see what you're getting at.
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    Quote Originally Posted by implied View Post
    maybe. depends on how much the person wants to change you, yeah? at least that's my observation. but i see what you're getting at.

    yeah, i mean it happens, but it doesn't seem like it'd be successful. fake ass bitches need major dudes-- it's the rules. the girl i really liked at work- she needed the dude with the short billed cap. i mean, the world really does make sense.

    also, when you end sentences with 'yeah?' it makes me want to fight you.
    asd

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    Quote Originally Posted by heath View Post
    yeah, i mean it happens, but it doesn't seem like it'd be successful. fake ass bitches need major dudes-- it's the rules. the girl i really liked at work- she needed the dude with the short billed cap. i mean, the world really does make sense.

    also, when you end sentences with 'yeah?' it makes me want to fight you.
    YEAH?
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    Yeah.
    asd

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    Quote Originally Posted by implied View Post
    yes, but i'd trust if it bothered a guy this much, he'd say, "hey, your legs are absolutely scraping me to pieces." whereas, i think a guy concerned with societal standards of beauty might pick something else to say, yeah?
    Oddly enough, that "scraping" phenomenon would only occur a few days after shaving (at least on legs it does). When leg hair gets longer, it's softer. So, IMO, it would depend if the guy is bothered because you have to keep shaving to keep him happy or if it really is a sensory thing. In which case, it could still be an ingrained societal expectation that he's "learned" to dislike on a sensory level.

    I personally don't like beards or mustaches aesthetically, but don't mind the look of goatees. But because facial hair can be very coarse, any variety would probably still irritate my sensitive skin.
    socio: INFp - IEI
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    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune View Post
    Oddly enough, that "scraping" phenomenon would only occur a few days after shaving (at least on legs it does). When leg hair gets longer, it's softer. So, IMO, it would depend if the guy is bothered because you have to keep shaving to keep him happy or if it really is a sensory thing. In which case, it could still be an ingrained societal expectation that he's "learned" to dislike on a sensory level.
    Yeah, actually most of the time girl's hair is not really bothersome when they're not shaven BUT also has grown for a week or so. Most of the time, it's not really visible either. I guess shaving once in a while would be okay (for girls) just when it really becomes visibile, so I'd guess once every 3 months.
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    Quote Originally Posted by FDG View Post
    Yeah, actually most of the time girl's hair is not really bothersome when they're not shaven BUT also has grown for a week or so. Most of the time, it's not really visible either. I guess shaving once in a while would be okay (for girls) just when it really becomes visibile, so I'd guess once every 3 months.
    Which is why I really love Fall and Winter... can get away with a few months unless I'm having to wear a dress or trying to seduce someone. =)

    I hate Summer b/c I'm forced to keep up with it more frequently.
    socio: INFp - IEI
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    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune View Post
    Which is why I really love Fall and Winter... can get away with a few months unless I'm having to wear a dress or trying to seduce someone. =)

    I hate Summer b/c I'm forced to keep up with it more frequently.
    I emphatize - during the spring-summer I compete in cycling and thus have to shave, too. Definitely painful. There's an exception to my preference for shaving, though: I think pubic hair should be trim more often, depending on how much the specific girl is subject to its growth. Just don't make it a forest, kind of (I try to adhere to the same standard myself). Oh, I also find armpits shaving to be completely stupid.
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