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Thread: How to get closer to an IEI-INFp girl?

  1. #1
    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
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    Default How to get closer to an IEI-INFp girl?

    Can anyone give me tips/pointer as to how I can get closer to an INFP girl? I'm trying to express interest in one, and I'm nearly positive she's interested in me, but I'm absolutely stumped as to ways in which I can get more of her attention in order to show her that the attraction is mutual. What makes an INFP want to open up and talk to other people?
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

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    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    being an estp or an istj.
    Or ENFp!

    “Let us forget with generosity those who cannot love us”
    ― Pablo Neruda

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kim
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    being an estp or an istj.
    Or ENFp!

    High five Kimbo!


    Hey dont infps like to be smacked around? :wink:

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    Hey dont infps like to be smacked around?

    Oh hit me hard baby.

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    I'm back, assholes! Herzy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HarryBottom
    Hey dont infps like to be smacked around?

    Oh hit me hard baby.



    , Se-sub
    8w8-3w8-7w8 sx/sx

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    Shit. I should hate to see little Herzy in a few years.

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    I'm back, assholes! Herzy's Avatar
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    Lol, I don't think I'll end up like that...and if I did, I'd definately charge more than that.
    , Se-sub
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    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
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    Ok, so buy whips and chains and be seen wearing them in public.

    Anything else?
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

  9. #9
    Topaz's Avatar
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    Look what I started..... You guys... tsk tsk tsk

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

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    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
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    Well, it's come to a strange place...I'm interested in her, and she's interested in me (i'm almost positive), but I really don't know her very well and I'm trying to figure out how I can connect with her in a basic way that will make conversation more interesting and help to take things to a level at which I'm comfortable being more forward with her.
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

  11. #11
    Creepy-

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    Quote Originally Posted by gilligan87
    Well, it's come to a strange place...I'm interested in her, and she's interested in me (i'm almost positive), but I really don't know her very well and I'm trying to figure out how I can connect with her in a basic way that will make conversation more interesting and help to take things to a level at which I'm comfortable being more forward with her.
    (apologies in advance to the INFp boys, I use "she" only because it's relevant to Gilligan's situation).

    To the INFp mind: attention = interest.

    I must emphasise the point of lavishing attention on the INFp! Make a point of being close to her. If you are interested but try to maintain a distance between the two of you, she will get frustrated. Engage her emotions!

    As maizemedley said, teasing is a hit. The INFp loves to be teased, even if she protests it will be obvious that she's enjoying herself.

    The INFp shouldn't be a mystery, she wears her heart on her sleeve. If you want to know how she feels about what you're doing, you just need to look

    Also be patient with her "head-in-the-clouds"-ness. The INFp is disdainful of reality, and any attempt to make her engage with it to any significant extent will likely be met with a passive hostility. Day-dreams are more fun, anyway.

    I will avoid saying too much about BDSM (though it is quite attractive :wink, but aggressiveness can be a good thing.

    Chivalry is another wonderful thing. The INFp wants to be romanced, she wants her knight in shining armour.

    Hope that helps!

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    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
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    Attention I can do. Kngiht-in-shining-armor I can do. Whips and chains I can do, if need be. But my Fe (weak as it is) just doesn't pick up on what she wants sometimes. Last night we were talking online, and it took me about a typed page to realize that I was going off on a tangeant about myself and that her responses were getting slower and slower. How can I avoid this? Do I just have to try really hard or what??
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

  13. #13
    Topaz's Avatar
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    sounds like youre trying too hard now. Let her do the talking. Then tease her about her responses and ask funny questions that shock her

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

  14. #14
    Creepy-

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    Quote Originally Posted by gilligan87
    Attention I can do. Kngiht-in-shining-armor I can do. Whips and chains I can do, if need be. But my Fe (weak as it is) just doesn't pick up on what she wants sometimes. Last night we were talking online, and it took me about a typed page to realize that I was going off on a tangeant about myself and that her responses were getting slower and slower. How can I avoid this? Do I just have to try really hard or what??
    I'm a guy, but if it helps:

    I want to understand others and the world around me. I spend a great deal of time observing human interactions in context. The easiest way to get me to talk is to comment on some observable interaction.

    My comments are just passing thoughts. My thoughts change as quickly as an ENFP changes topics. My thoughts are not critical. Do not criticize them. If I have to be critical, it might be decades before I feel confident enough to say anything.

    I can change subjects easily, since I like to explore a topic from different perspectives. I do not follow changes in topic easily. I like to explore topics. Try to stay on topic for awhile.

    In English the subject is often the topic. This created a problem in verbal communications with my ENFP sister. She had to learn to give me notice when changing topics. "There's a bird," she says. Then she gives me a moment to adjust. Even then, sometimes I can only follow her for a short time before shifting back to the previous topic. This is where my mind is. And its hard being in two places at once.

    (Being pulled in two directions is the biggest stressor in our verbal communications.)

    I like spontaneous interactions. I have difficulty with many forms of social interaction. I don't like feeing compelled to interact.

    I live in the moment. I like to be carefree; practical is whatever I am practicing at the moment. I like to be creative; reality is whatever I am realizing at the moment.

  15. #15
    Creepy-pokeball

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    "I mean, she's always given off plenty of affection but knowing how little she knew about me/my inner world... made me question her....sincerity. It felt fake." -MM

    Side-subject but I thought this was fun:

    This is as easy way to detect NFs. Keirsey's books are kinda fluff but the whole NF-Authenticity thing is very true. You'll hear it time and time again in very different ways. It is a reoccuring theme. Kinda cool eh? ^_^ It seems that the Ne side and Ni side state it differently--or rather the Ni side states it and the Ne side acts on it lol.

  16. #16
    Creepy-pokeball

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    Please Understand Me 2. I'll answer the rest later. My WC3 buddies are waiting on me =p

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    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
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    Warcraft? Are you telling me that ENFj's can be nerds too? Holy shit...
    But, for a certainty, back then,
    We loved so many, yet hated so much,
    We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...

    Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
    Whilst our laughter echoed,
    Under cerulean skies...

  18. #18
    Creepy-

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    Quote Originally Posted by gilligan87
    Warcraft? Are you telling me that ENFj's can be nerds too? Holy shit...
    Anyone can be a nerd! I am excessively proud of t3h 1337 sk1llz0rz.

    t3h qu1k 8r0wn f0X0r pwn3d t3h l4Zy d09 :wink:

    There are 10 types of people in this world and
    01100001011011000110110000100000011101000110100001 10010101101001011100100010000001100010011000010111 00110110010100100000011000010111001001100101001000 00011000100110010101101100011011110110111001100111 00100000011101000110111100100000010000100110010101 1101000110000100100001

    bfhat po Pady!

    *cackles*

    (oh god, did I really post that?)

  19. #19
    Creepy-pokeball

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    Yeah...well, sorta. I definitely make it more social. Sometimes the regulars get mad at me for bring in new people lol. I dont care though. It's nice to veg out and let your brain melt while playing. I probably wouldnt be playing but my brother is a programmer (which is where computers come in) and it seemed like a good compromise for things to do with my best friend ($#@ introverts! sigh) without having to go out a lot. then I got hooked =( I can say for sure that Im a rare breed on there although my best 2 gaming buddies are ENTp and ENTj so Im sure one can imagine how "functional" we are together =p

  20. #20
    Creepy-pokeball

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    Quote Originally Posted by maizemedley
    Quote Originally Posted by Jadae
    "I mean, she's always given off plenty of affection but knowing how little she knew about me/my inner world... made me question her....sincerity. It felt fake." -MM

    Side-subject but I thought this was fun:

    This is as easy way to detect NFs. Keirsey's books are kinda fluff but the whole NF-Authenticity thing is very true. You'll hear it time and time again in very different ways. It is a reoccuring theme. Kinda cool eh? ^_^ It seems that the Ne side and Ni side state it differently--or rather the Ni side states it and the Ne side acts on it lol.
    Woah, woah, woah, slow down slow down, this I gotta hear. Come again? There's an "NF-authencity thing" that is heard time and again? ooooh, which specific Keirsey book? The Ne side and the Ni side state IT differently....what is "it"?

    The Ni side states it? and the Ne side acts on it? What is IT? Authencity or fakeness? My sister is a big ole' fake. OMG, let me tell you. She always (doesn't skip a beat) sends us Christmas cards and b-day gifts that many a times have absolutely no personal meaning attached. She gave me a G.I. JANE dvd. What the fuck do I want a G.I. Jane DVD for? Obviously she's a re-gifter!! It was more insulting than anything. I on the other hand haven't bought her shit in YEARS. I did write her a letter once and she had it on her fridge for like a year!!!! awwww, THAT was sweet. The fact that she left it there for so long....I consider THAT to be a REAL GIFT. Wait, she was probably too busy to REMOVE it. Damn it, nevermind. We are each other's gift damn it! Why ruin it with store bought junk. I'd rather give her a hug and letter.

    You're an NF, how does Fe fit into any of this?

    I should buy a few books then come back to this site.
    "It" is authenticity.

    Ni introspects (looks within) and Ne projects ("popcorns" outward as one ENFp psychologist I met put it). Authenticity is expressed differently due to this .

    Fe, for me, can be a bit cold. If I do not feel someone is being authentic I'll tolerate them and then turn a cold shoulder until they prove authentic. That is the harsh side of the judgers lol. I really dont have much tolerance for someone I feel I cannot trust. Impersonal--fine. Not authentic-- no thanks, bye, Im not wasting my time.

    Are you sure she is an ENFp? Is there anything interfering with an average ENFp pattern? For example, family hierarchy, rivalry, abnormalties, etc.

  21. #21
    Creepy-pokeball

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    LOL ... and this why some temperament theorists call the NF's catalysts and not idealists. Maybe it is for the best that you dont answer my question lol. Sometimes I wish I wouldnt answer my own... then again, Im also glad I do =X

  22. #22
    Creepy-pokeball

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    Catalysts is more accurate. Sometimes the NF's have been dead on about what is realistic-- it is just so abstract and detatched that it may seem idealistic. Their ideals can also become reality over time-- and have become a reality. So idealist isnt quite sturdy enough of a "label" for me. Catalysts, on the other hand, is quite accurate more often than not (whether we want to admit it or not! eeek.).

  23. #23
    Creepy-aurora_faerie

    Default heh

    Okay I'm aware that it's already been said but...


    ATTENTION=<3 lol!

    Let her talk about herself some yes, but also try to butt in and say things about you. She'll like that because she likes it when people tell her things about themselves. It makes her feel special, as silly as that sounds.

    Also, I don't know if all INFp's are like this...but I am...I get sort of....reclusive sometimes. BUT, if she does seem to be getting distant, just remember that it may not be because she's not interested in you, she is probably just recharging.

    Hell...I've been recharge from Xmas for nearly 5 days!!!! lol

    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    Okay now I'm scared that I might be giving bad advice!!!!!! OH NOES THE WORLD IS ENDING FOR @LL!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

    (is done)

    -muff

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    Default Re: heh

    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    -muff
    Am I the only one who doesn't think that sounds like an INFp?
    MAYBE I'LL BREAK DOWN!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Rocky's posts are as enjoyable as having wisdom teeth removed.

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    nah, 100$ true, aurora_faerie.
    http://forum.socionix.com

    I don't see what's so important about the possibility of extraterrestrial life. It's just more people to declare war on.

    EVERYONE PLZ CONTINUE TO UPLOAD INFINITE AMOUNT OF PICS OF "CUTE" CATS AND PUPPIES. YOU KNOW WE GIVE A SHIT!!

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    Default Re: heh

    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    -muff
    Am I the only one who doesn't think that sounds like an INFp?
    I think alot of women feel this way.

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

  27. #27
    Creepy-aurora_faerie

    Default Re: heh

    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    -muff
    Am I the only one who doesn't think that sounds like an INFp?
    Actually I thought was the most INFp sounding part in my whole post...o_O

  28. #28
    Creepy-aurora_faerie

    Default Re: heh

    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    -muff
    Am I the only one who doesn't think that sounds like an INFp?
    I think alot of women feel this way.

    Yeah but INFp women love it SUPER EXTRA!

  29. #29
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    Default Re: heh

    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    -muff
    Am I the only one who doesn't think that sounds like an INFp?
    I think alot of women feel this way.

    Yeah but INFp women love it SUPER EXTRA!
    HA! SUPER EXTRA! Im going to have to remember that expression. SUPER EXTRA! you kill me.

    Topaz
    The artifact which is the source of my power will not be kept on the Mountain of Despair beyond the River of Fire guarded by the Dragons of Eternity. It will be in my safe-deposit box. The same applies to the object which is my one weakness.

  30. #30
    Creepy-

    Default Re: heh

    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    Quote Originally Posted by aurora_faerie
    INFp's enjoy small things. Small gestures that normally don't mean anything, DO mean something to them. They appreciate it when you take a little time out to talk to them while you're busy for example. Again, dumb, but hey.

    -muff
    Am I the only one who doesn't think that sounds like an INFp?
    Unless I'm also an ISFp....

    @aurora_faerie: totally!

  31. #31

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    Ishy, my impression of an INFp is like this. They like to tell you that you are annoying them when they really enjoy it. Like, if someone was to pinch an INFp, or slap their but, they make look cold and say something like, "Stop it!", but you can tell that they really enjoy it. They don't like to admit it to other people that they enjoy these sort of "physical pleasures" because sex and things like that are held very secret to them.

    No?
    MAYBE I'LL BREAK DOWN!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Rocky's posts are as enjoyable as having wisdom teeth removed.

  32. #32
    Creepy-

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    Rocky, that's true, but it doesn't exclude what you quoted from aurora_faerie.

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