So, when I'm doing something in which "style" isn't a factor, and there are (what I perceive to be) a clear "right" and "wrong" way, I prefer someone to tell me, "you're not doing this correctly, this is the right way."
My ESI gf prefers a more, um nuanced approach, "Hey, have you tried doing it this way?" or "Maybe you should try doing it another way, like this, for example."
A specific example: we were playing Gran Turismo 4, a game which I really like, and my gf really hates, because she's no good at it. I was totally dominating the track, and she was getting frustrated, so I told her "you're not braking enough before you turn/downshift, brake sooner and you'll make the turn; also, you're not entering the turns from the far side, you need to in order to make the turn." She interpreted this as me being a condescending asshole, and an argument ensued, during which the above general preferences for receiving advice were elucidated.
She interpreted my advice as basically saying, "you're stupid and don't know what you're doing." Conversely, if I receive advice in the style she prefers, I interpret it as saying "you're stupid and don't know what you're doing."
What's going on here, from a functional perspective? Anyone have similar, or observed similar ways of taking advice?