Ha ha got you. Actually I was just wondering if anyone has any insights/experiences they would like to share about the dynamics of group relations.

I was sharing a flat last year with 2 other girls - my supervisor (ESTj) and my look-alike (INFp). I'll tell you what - I don't recommend that combination. The other two girls being each others' conflictors, I was constantly having to act as the mediator. It was awkward for me, because I got on pretty well with both of them and yet had to listen to each of them rant about the other one's faults. I didn't know anything about relations btwn types at the
time, and so it often boggled my mind how they often completely misinterpreted each others'actions and thought that the other one was always out to get them. There was this incident which is a pretty accurate reflection of our day-to-day relations. To cut the word count, I'll call ESTj 'T' and INFp 'F' . Okay - well this particular day T arrives home all newly enthused, having just come from this self-development seminar about improving relationships. So she calls a flat meeting and proceeds to outline things we can do and steps we should take to improve our relations with each other (she was addressing us collectively, but clearly meaning her and F's relationship). Well, I was thinking 'that's a bit naive, but it will be interesting to hear what she comes up with' and hoping that F would see it the same way. One look at her face and my hopes are dashed - it was an absolute thundercloud. So I'm sitting there foreseeing a big blowup and contemplating a hasty exit. Unfortunately, T has eyes too and gathers that F isn't willing to cooperate and so starts lighting into her about 'being selfish' and 'not being willing to make a few sacrifices' and F continues to sit there with this murderous expression on her face, her eyes glued to the TV. I'm thinking 'surely you can see she means well' - but anyway, it soon becomes apparent that F is not going to argue her side of the case, so I think 'Great - now I'll have to step in and defend her'. So I proceed to spell out what I perceive F's feelings to be and start going on about how being flatmates, and not family, we are only obligated to be respectful and courteous to each other and that we were under no obligation to take orders from her about things we had to do to improve our relations with her. I said that if it was obvious that two people were never going to be bosom buddies, what's the point in pushing it. Anyway, now I'm feeling bad for T because she concedes the point and looks kind of deflated. F then gets up and leaves the room - still not having said a word - and I'm left trying to placate T who is going on about 'you can't say I didn't try' and F's stubborn and selfish personality. Anyway, later on F comes up to me and thanks me for standing up for her and says that she was just too mad to say anything.

Whew - that was longwinded. Anyone out there have their own story to tell?