What is this about?

[Ezra]

Why is it that people around me are still stuck in cliqueland, still making stabbing comments at one another? I mean, where's the maturity? It's like insecure people make cutting remarks; a select few people stuck back in high school. Then you've got people who are not friendly at all; they're all cliquey. I went to see justice the other day, and saw two people from my halls. I glowered at them for about five seconds and they clearly recognised me, but merely stared blankly. My friend saw one of them the other day and smiled. This guy pretty much stared back at her. But these cutting people are the worst. They're the kind of people who will give on a whim, but when they get it, they break apart and go on the defensive. They can't take a joke about themselves and expect others to laugh when they full on rip into them. There's a guy whom I think is my supervisor; he constantly attacks me with little digs and remarks. And it reminds me of being back in high school, when the insecure kid who was wary of looking too much like a twat got all moody when people attacked him, so he feels the same way about others and goes on the attack. I mean come on. Why can't we all just get along and chill together? Fuck this hostility. It takes the piss. It's not conducive to a relaxing atmosphere. I'm all for witty banter, but plain, constant attacks on one individual just make me lash out. I swear I will explode one day. I swear.

[xyz]

Why is it that people around me are still stuck in cliqueland, still making stabbing comments at one another? I mean, where's the maturity? It's like insecure people make cutting remarks; a select few people stuck back in high school. Then you've got people who are not friendly at all; they're all cliquey. I went to see justice the other day, and saw two people from my halls. I glowered at them for about five seconds and they clearly recognised me, but merely stared blankly. My friend saw one of them the other day and smiled. This guy pretty much stared back at her. But these cutting people are the worst. They're the kind of people who will give on a whim, but when they get it, they break apart and go on the defensive. They can't take a joke about themselves and expect others to laugh when they full on rip into them. There's a guy whom I think is my supervisor; he constantly attacks me with little digs and remarks. And it reminds me of being back in high school, when the insecure kid who was wary of looking too much like a twat got all moody when people attacked him, so he feels the same way about others and goes on the attack. I mean come on. Why can't we all just get along and chill together? Fuck this hostility. It takes the piss. It's not conducive to a relaxing atmosphere. I'm all for witty banter, but plain, constant attacks on one individual just make me lash out. I swear I will explode one day. I swear.

wait, you're talking about people where you live or people here?

I don't really mind anyone here really. Except for UDP, he owes me.

[implied]

[Ezra]

I'm talking about life. No one does it here. You can't really do it; it has little effect. It is all offline.

[xyz]

I'm talking about life. No one does it here. You can't really do it; it has little effect. It is all offline.

good man.

Um, well, people are always going to suck. So cliquey people can stay with their cliquey friends and pass around cliquey STDs. Just know that eventually it'll just become an echochamber with that circle, if it stays close minded about new people anyway.

[Ezra]

Good advice.

[UDP]

I don't really mind anyone here really. Except for UDP, he owes me.

Here, have some brownies:

[Ezra]

Well then, that settles it!

[xyz]

Here, have some brownies:

Well then, that settles it!

Indeed

[discourse]

I wish I could help you, but I'm afraid that even if could know how to, making this topic public, would bring all sort of bully people into here to post insults. Because there's a lot of people outside usually, who feel vulnerable, when intimate subjects are made open. And they usually respond to that uncomfortable situation, by denying it and acting hatefully.

For example,let's take an hypothetic situation. They're guests in relatives. He and he's family. But he feels that, he has unresolved matters related to he's uncle . But he feels that the problem will be brought up . So he denies it . Intimately he knows that the roots of the problem are in himself. He doesn't like who he is. And uncle likes to rub into he's face how he didn't manage the college. So when he feels again, that this painful problem is becoming opened. He steps into defense. And he acts agressivly. By blaming others. And doing them down the zero. Knowing, when it all ends, that he is guilty. And he needs to change himself.



(Yeah, I know, my English syntax is bad).

So I just wanted to say something nice. Trust in yourself. Trust others. Find a solution to it with friends who are close to you.

[cracka]

I wish I could help you, but I'm afraid that even if could know how to, making this topic public, would bring all sort of bully people into here to post insults. Because there's a lot of people outside usually, who feel vulnerable, when intimate subjects are made open. And they usually respond to that uncomfortable situation, by denying it and acting hatefully.

For example,let's take an hypothetic situation. They're guests in relatives. He and he's family. But he feels that, he has unresolved matters related to he's uncle . But he feels that the problem will be brought up . So he denies it . Intimately he knows that the roots of the problem are in himself. He doesn't like who he is. And uncle likes to rub into he's face how he didn't manage the college. So when he feels again, that this painful problem is becoming opened. He steps into defense. And he acts agressivly. By blaming others. And doing them down the zero. Knowing, when it all ends, that he is guilty. And he needs to change himself.



(Yeah, I know, my English syntax is bad).

So I just wanted to say something nice. Trust in yourself. Trust others. Find a solution to it with friends who are close to you.

Strange, I actually enjoyed this post because the English wasn't totally correct.

[Luke]

I mean come on. Why can't we all just get along and chill together? Fuck this hostility. It takes the piss. It's not conducive to a relaxing atmosphere. I'm all for witty banter, but plain, constant attacks on one individual just make me lash out. I swear I will explode one day. I swear.

Dude, you need some dualization, stat.

Online is real. Don't underestimate it. It's a different kind of real, but it's still real. Words affect people. If I say you're a good person, it makes you feel good even if it is online. If forums and such didn't affect you at all, they wouldn't be nearly so interesting.

Everyone needs a positive atmosphere for their psychological health. You get what you give though, so the people who need it worst are often least likely to get it. It can become a vicious cycle where you feel bad and this causes behavior that attracts criticism and attacks.

I would suggest that if you cut all profanity for 30 days, you'd get a positive result, as it unconsciously signals hostility to a lot of people. After the 30 days, you will be free from the habit (I think it takes about 21 days to make or break a habit) so when you do use these words it will be a conscious effort and therefore a more satisfying feeling -- and you will be able to control who you do it around, etc. more easily.

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...ys-to-success/ is a great article on the subject.

[Ezra]

Oh Luke, you so Te valuing.

[FDG]

http://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/200...ys-to-success/ is a great article on the subject.

Oh no please. Not that histeric neurotic guy that thinks everything in life is "hard work" and "success"

Everytime I read some excepts from him I think he is so out of the world that...gah! Like, on being vegan

I was living in Marina del Rey at the time and used to run along the beach near the Santa Monica Pier, and I noticed I wasn’t as tired after my usual 3-mile runs, so I started increasing them to 5 miles, 10 miles, and then eventually a marathon a few years later.

Tired after 3 miles? Must be his suckage rather than the fact that he wasn't vegan. Who can't run for more than 3 miles, not even my old grandma.

Also in 1997, I decided I wanted to exercise every single day for a year. That was my 1997 New Year’s resolution.

Whoa, that must be extttreeeemely hard, one hour of exercise every day! Man!

I could go on days commenting negatively every fucking page of that website.

Ask someone new out on a date every day. Unless your success rate is below 3%, you’ll get at least one new date, maybe even meet your future spouse.

LOL this guy sweats "loser" from every damn pore

How to become an early riser? WHat kind of advice is that? You just have to wake up early, big deal!

I hope that site gets cranked by some hacker soon

[Ezra]

Oh no please. Not that histeric neurotic guy that thinks everything in life is "hard work" and "success"

Because you're Te ego.

[discojoe]

Why is it that people around me are still stuck in cliqueland, still making stabbing comments at one another? I mean, where's the maturity? It's like insecure people make cutting remarks; a select few people stuck back in high school. Then you've got people who are not friendly at all; they're all cliquey. I went to see justice the other day, and saw two people from my halls. I glowered at them for about five seconds and they clearly recognised me, but merely stared blankly. My friend saw one of them the other day and smiled. This guy pretty much stared back at her. But these cutting people are the worst. They're the kind of people who will give on a whim, but when they get it, they break apart and go on the defensive. They can't take a joke about themselves and expect others to laugh when they full on rip into them. There's a guy whom I think is my supervisor; he constantly attacks me with little digs and remarks. And it reminds me of being back in high school, when the insecure kid who was wary of looking too much like a twat got all moody when people attacked him, so he feels the same way about others and goes on the attack. I mean come on. Why can't we all just get along and chill together? Fuck this hostility. It takes the piss. It's not conducive to a relaxing atmosphere. I'm all for witty banter, but plain, constant attacks on one individual just make me lash out. I swear I will explode one day. I swear.

[Luke]

Oh Luke, you so Te valuing.

What's that supposed to mean? I was LII last I checked...

[Luke]

Oh no please. Not that histeric neurotic guy that thinks everything in life is "hard work" and "success"

LOL this guy sweats "loser" from every damn pore

Nothing screams "loser" more than tearing down someone whose success you are jealous of.

Admit it. You wish you were as popular as Steve Pavlina.

[Ezra]

What's that supposed to mean?

It means you offer comprehensive advice which I believe to be related to a Te attitude.

[FDG]

Nothing screams "loser" more than tearing down someone whose success you are jealous of.

Admit it. You wish you were as popular as Steve Pavlina.

I didn't even know he was popular. I don't know where you perceive jealousy from there. I just find his attitude ridiculous. He honestly strikes me as a sucker from everything he says. Honestly. How could I ever take advice from somebody that has trouble waking up early, for exmaple? Or that feels fatigued after having run 3 miles??

Now, if instead everything he writes is just aimed at hitting the right audience and making money out of it, he's a genius and kudos to him.

[Luke]

I didn't even know he was popular. I don't know where you perceive jealousy from there.

The accusation was successful at getting you to voice a more interesting critique. I assure you I had no concrete reason to think you were in fact jealous, although as a remote possibility it couldn't be ruled out (oftentimes negative attitudes do originate this way).

I just find his attitude ridiculous. He honestly strikes me as a sucker from everything he says. Honestly. How could I ever take advice from somebody that has trouble waking up early, for exmaple? Or that feels fatigued after having run 3 miles??

Have you taken into account sociotype differences here? If you are SLE, his problems as an LIE or LII could be things you wouldn't break a sweat over. Nor would your willpower-dependent "solutions" make sense to the millions of NT computer geeks and NF new agers that are Steve's audience. Instead it is helpful to a broader audience (of intuitors) to know how to synthesize willpower where it is absent; e.g. Pavlovian associations such as getting out of bed in response to the alarm going off.

Now, if instead everything he writes is just aimed at hitting the right audience and making money out of it, he's a genius and kudos to him.

Interesting. Do you admire the deliberate con more than the unconscious one? If Steve is a deliberate con, I agree that he's a genius about it. He certainly makes a big deal about being "conscious" about whichever path (self-serving or others-serving) you choose. However I haven't seen him endorse deception as a way to serve oneself, he seems to think ethically questionable actions are not in the interests of the enlightened self-serving person.

[ScarlettLux]

I didn't even know he was popular. I don't know where you perceive jealousy from there. I just find his attitude ridiculous. He honestly strikes me as a sucker from everything he says. Honestly. How could I ever take advice from somebody that has trouble waking up early, for exmaple? Or that feels fatigued after having run 3 miles??

Now, if instead everything he writes is just aimed at hitting the right audience and making money out of it, he's a genius and kudos to him.

This is exactly why you irk me sometimes, FDG. So pompous - not everyone finds stuff like that as easy as you do, all great one who can run more than 3 miles and wake up every day early...

Some people really do need to put effort into the little "simple" things and it pisses me off because I am exactly this type of person, and for you to come on here and be all nonchalant and condescending about it, well it strikes a nerve.

I think it has something to do with PoLR (at least for me), I am pretty terrible at taking care of my body and knowing how to do the simplest things related to health because I am a hypochondriac. Yeah yeah, we all know you claim yourself to be an LIE which supposedly has PoLR as well, but I'm just saying - for me, that PoLR COULD explain my difficulties.

More likely though, it is probably just a case of individual differences... I don't get what's wrong about this person that Luke posted a link to. I think it is admirable he is attempting to change something about himself that (despite you thinking it takes no effort at all) he normally finds hard to do. That in itself takes a lot of willpower. I guess for you, with your "natural" willpower, it's no biggie, but don't you think people who have a harder time who DO try really hard to change themselves deserve credit?

And wow, you think it is really that easy to exercise an hour every day? Not really! How many people out there are overweight because they can't manage something like that ...

[Ezra]

Yeah yeah, we all know you claim yourself to be an LIE which supposedly has PoLR as well

Fabio doesn't have Si PoLR. His claim that he's an LIE is like holocaust denial.

[ScarlettLux]

More evidence that you are not paying enough attention to the differences between ENTj's and ENFj's.

In all seriousness -- would they call ENTj "Jack London" if its Si POLR usually manifested quite like what Scarlett described?

(although perhaps more so in ENTj-Ni subtypes, a comparison is plausible.)

To this day, I probably least understand the ENTj as a type. I've never encountered any in real life, and the examples of "famous" ENTjs leave me with confused impressions of how they are generally like ... they seem much more upbeat than I expect, yet dry at the same time. The supposed ENTjs on this forum - Expat, Salawa and Joy... they all seem really different to me ... I don't feel supervised or anything by them, I think I'd easily get along with them IRL

[krieger]

The best way to understand a concept like "Si PoLR" is to relate it to it's practical manifestation, eg. "a vulnerability to those behavioral aspects that ISFps and ISTps are known for having as their most characteristic and most developed".

[FDG]

My prototypical ENTj (though I'm not sure which subtype) would be the 20th century physicist Richard Feynman.

Thank god. Another (IMHO) possible prototypical ENTj that choose a different path:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinhold_Messner

This is exactly why you irk me sometimes, FDG. So pompous - not everyone finds stuff like that as easy as you do, all great one who can run more than 3 miles and wake up every day early...

That would be okay, as long as they don't go around publicizing their newfound ability to do such a thing via a website mostly dedicated to similar issues, that elevates them to incredible accomplishments.

More likely though, it is probably just a case of individual differences... I don't get what's wrong about this person that Luke posted a link to. I think it is admirable he is attempting to change something about himself that (despite you thinking it takes no effort at all) he normally finds hard to do. That in itself takes a lot of willpower. I guess for you, with your "natural" willpower, it's no biggie, but don't you think people who have a harder time who DO try really hard to change themselves deserve credit?

I don't know. There's a thing you want to do, you do it. No big deal, but really, for most things. I just don't see the need to create a mighty might like he's doing.

[Suomea]

...

[Mariano Rajoy]

Why is it that people around me are still stuck in cliqueland, still making stabbing comments at one another? I mean, where's the maturity? It's like insecure people make cutting remarks; a select few people stuck back in high school. Then you've got people who are not friendly at all; they're all cliquey. I went to see justice the other day, and saw two people from my halls. I glowered at them for about five seconds and they clearly recognised me, but merely stared blankly. My friend saw one of them the other day and smiled. This guy pretty much stared back at her. But these cutting people are the worst. They're the kind of people who will give on a whim, but when they get it, they break apart and go on the defensive. They can't take a joke about themselves and expect others to laugh when they full on rip into them. There's a guy whom I think is my supervisor; he constantly attacks me with little digs and remarks. And it reminds me of being back in high school, when the insecure kid who was wary of looking too much like a twat got all moody when people attacked him, so he feels the same way about others and goes on the attack. I mean come on. Why can't we all just get along and chill together? Fuck this hostility. It takes the piss. It's not conducive to a relaxing atmosphere. I'm all for witty banter, but plain, constant attacks on one individual just make me lash out. I swear I will explode one day. I swear.

Travel abroad, away from the U.K.