ISFp needs some Se-love!

[Charismatik]

It has come to my attention lately that I am withdrawing to a degree that makes me unhappy, and that I need to foster my Se a little more. I know I CAN do it because I have before, and once I get into the groove of things I'm fine. But right now I'm not, and I'd really appreciate a little advice from whoever feels they might have something that could help.

If it helps, I think a reason I'm doing it is because I don't have many people close to me here at school. At home I do, but at school I keep letting myself get disillusioned with people too soon and peg them as 'inauthentic' or I start resenting when my semi-friends can predict me too well because I start feeling boxed in.

A little advice? I know life's not worth living without other people- at least to ISFps- but for some reason I'm having trouble getting ouf of this rut.

[Suomea]

It has come to my attention lately that I am withdrawing to a degree that makes me unhappy, and that I need to foster my Se a little more. I know I CAN do it because I have before, and once I get into the groove of things I'm fine. But right now I'm not, and I'd really appreciate a little advice from whoever feels they might have something that could help.

If it helps, I think a reason I'm doing it is because I don't have many people close to me here at school. At home I do, but at school I keep letting myself get disillusioned with people too soon and peg them as 'inauthentic' or I start resenting when my semi-friends can predict me too well because I start feeling boxed in.

A little advice? I know life's not worth living without other people- at least to ISFps- but for some reason I'm having trouble getting ouf of this rut.

I know what it's like... especially being in a rut. I peg a lot of people as 'inauthentic' as well. I think the reason is that that's the case.... there are a ton of inauthentic people.... plain and simple.....: ) BUT and I do mean but, there are a rediculous amount of amazing real people in this world too who are honest about who they are and who aren't out in this world being fake or trying to take advantage of others. And the key is to keep pushing to find those people... because they are out there. And if you hit a wall then push in a slightly different direction. I'm really not sure how well I could ever help you solve your problems on a forum, but hopefully you already know the answers to what you should do and just need a push to do what you think you should. Anyway, sorry I couldn't be of a bigger help.....:/ Good luck....: )

[Mediator Kam]

It has come to my attention lately that I am withdrawing to a degree that makes me unhappy, and that I need to foster my Se a little more. I know I CAN do it because I have before, and once I get into the groove of things I'm fine. But right now I'm not, and I'd really appreciate a little advice from whoever feels they might have something that could help.

If it helps, I think a reason I'm doing it is because I don't have many people close to me here at school. At home I do, but at school I keep letting myself get disillusioned with people too soon and peg them as 'inauthentic' or I start resenting when my semi-friends can predict me too well because I start feeling boxed in.

A little advice? I know life's not worth living without other people- at least to ISFps- but for some reason I'm having trouble getting ouf of this rut.

We can be friends, ok? I hope we can.

It'd be fun, we could predict each other the whole day.

[Ms. Kensington]

you should go find one of those ENTps you hate and they will make you feel sooo competent, or find an INTj who will make you laugh and thus forget about troubles. I've found the way alpha works is by nudging things in a way that refocuses attention usually by laughter and magically it just disappears. I know an ISFp in real life and if i just do what she says i magically become happy. I give her a lot of advice that she listens to, but really i think they way I lift her spirits is just by being weird and funny. She always says, "youre so mean, *lol*"

Edit: i think now you were more asking about how to trust people.. but i think all ruts are connected in the end. fix one problem you fix them all. one way isfps can recharge is to have alone time or by cooking for other people. it just makes them do something that comes naturally.. anything that gets you into *you* mode will refocus your energies into feeling insecure which is usually why people are distrustful of others in the first place.

[Suomea]

Haha..... anamericancer's advice is best..... you should take that.....

[Charismatik]

I love you! Let's get married! Let's make babies!

Haha... okay, deal! Yay, I found me an ENTp hubby!

We can be friends, ok? I hope we can.

It'd be fun, we could predict each other the whole day.

And yes, I would definitely be up for that! Y'know I've never met another ISFp before in real life? Funny, isn't it? I didn't think we were THAT rare...


Thanks for the love, guys, I feel a little better. I'm just in a funk and I can tell it has a lot to do with me just refusing to let my Se into the picture. Now that I have a fiance and a friend (hooray!) I think I'll be a little better off... haha. Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?

[Mediator Kam]

Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?

I just waited until I felt better. Or I relied on my friends.

[cracka]

Haha... okay, deal! Yay, I found me an ENTp hubby!

I thought you have to be a guy to be called a hubby.

[Mediator Kam]

I thought you have to be a guy to be called a hubby.

Alpha love knows no bounds cracka. I thought you knew that, on account of your alpha origins.

[PotatoSpirit]

I thought you have to be a guy to be called a hubby.

Oh I'm sure cancer can work the details out.

[cracka]

Alpha love knows no bounds cracka. I thought you knew that, on account of your alpha origins.

I'm not saying that there's any bounds to it, just the word hubby implies "guy" to me. Is there a female version of this word floating around that I should know or does it actually work correctly here?

[theMime.]

anything that gets you into *you* mode will refocus your energies into feeling insecure which is usually why people are distrustful of others in the first place.

wait ok so you mean when we get super focused on ourselves we get insecure and distrustful of others?

[theMime.]

Haha... okay, deal! Yay, I found me an ENTp hubby!




And yes, I would definitely be up for that! Y'know I've never met another ISFp before in real life? Funny, isn't it? I didn't think we were THAT rare...


Thanks for the love, guys, I feel a little better. I'm just in a funk and I can tell it has a lot to do with me just refusing to let my Se into the picture. Now that I have a fiance and a friend (hooray!) I think I'll be a little better off... haha. Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?

If you ever do meet an ISFp in person it will probably be like something out of the twilight zone....seriously, it was the weirdest thing when I got to know another ISFp in person...sometimes it even felt like I was hanging out with my clone. We're actually really different even tho we have the same type but it still felt like that.

Rut? Yuuuuup I know what those are like. What I do is call every single one of my friends until at least one of them can hang out or at least just chat. And I find that when I need to be around people after spending too much time alone even just going to a public place with people I don't even know helps. Those things might also work for you.

If you wanna boost your mood you can try doing a random act of kindness for someone...those usually always work for me...might work for you too. I also just stop thinking...this might sound crazy but when I just don't think my mood just naturally gets better. OH and try dwelling on positive things! Like think about all the things in your life that you're thankful for and all the things you appreciate about yourself.

Sorry if none of this helps. Don't worry though you're rut will end...they always do. =) =)

Oh and Suomea is right about amazing people in the world. =)

[Mediator Kam]

xD ISFp's are soooo positive about life and how great it is.

[Luke]

Why would an SiFe want more Se? Wouldn't that be Fe?

[Mediator Kam]

Charismatik is mixed up in the world of MBTI and its' terminology, that's all.

The MBTI profiles tell her that if you are an "unhealthy ISFP", you are allowing your dominant Fi to weaken your auxiliary Se.

If you notice, that corresponds to a socionics ISFj. Which furthers the mystery, what did Charismatik mean?

[Luke]

Charismatik is mixed up in the world of MBTI and its' terminology, that's all.

The MBTI profiles tell her that if you are an "unhealthy ISFP", you are allowing your dominant Fi to weaken your auxiliary Se.

If you notice, that corresponds to a socionics ISFj. Which furthers the mystery, what did Charismatik mean?

A SiFe needing more Fe? Or a FiSe needing more Se? Ah well, us loners all need friends.

[theMime.]

A SiFe needing more Fe? Or a FiSe needing more Se? Ah well, us loners all need friends.

HAHA well said!

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

You sure you're not INFp? INFp/INFjs/ISFp can all be pretty similiar.

Anyway, I think what helps me the most is talking to somebody that understands me from a soul, deeper level and then makes me do it anyway. If you're just a brute or try to bully me into 'just doing it' that never works either. You really need to be able to express who you really are, which is hard for a lot of people... esp. if you sense your community might not accept you. I mean you're blaming yourself, but maybe it could just be them?

If you don't want to talk to somebody, sometimes the problem isn't you.

Like for example one of my ESTp friends will say (after crying and whining on each other's shoulder for 3 hours) "Get on a plane and come see me." As direct and forceful as that. And since I know she really gets me, I'll actually do things with her. Why are good-natured people always so forced to do things they don't like all the time? Blah.

[Charismatik]

Charismatik is mixed up in the world of MBTI and its' terminology, that's all.

The MBTI profiles tell her that if you are an "unhealthy ISFP", you are allowing your dominant Fi to weaken your auxiliary Se.

If you notice, that corresponds to a socionics ISFj. Which furthers the mystery, what did Charismatik mean?

... really? How embarassing. The book I just read and loved claiming to be 'socionics' may not be as 'socionics' as I thought. And just when I thought I had it figured out a little! Heh.

Oh well, I think you all caught my drift anyway.

[Kristiina]

Maybe Charismatic will allow you to be the "wife"?

[Suomea]

Maybe Charismatic will allow you to be the "wife"?

Yeah Ana...... you're really giving up pretty quickly. Give her another chance.

[Rubicon]

Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?

I don't know about you, but when I've been down in the past there is always a reason for it, no exception - because I think we as ISFps are naturally pretty upbeat people. Maybe something that I'm feeling guilty about, a confrontation that I'm avoiding or something like that. It always works for me to bring this issue out in the open and think of a logical solution - or if I feel like I just can't deal with it by myself I'll talk it out with someone ... but I think letting it lie in your subconscious without dealing with it is dangerous. But anyway, I could be completely on the wrong track here ... but just letting you know what worked for me.

[theMime.]

I don't know about you, but when I've been down in the past there is always a reason for it, no exception - because I think we as ISFps are naturally pretty upbeat people. Maybe something that I'm feeling guilty about, a confrontation that I'm avoiding or something like that. It always works for me to bring this issue out in the open and think of a logical solution - or if I feel like I just can't deal with it by myself I'll talk it out with someone ... but I think letting it lie in your subconscious without dealing with it is dangerous. But anyway, I could be completely on the wrong track here ... but just letting you know what worked for me.

agreed.

[Mediator Kam]

agreed.

agreed.

[normal]

i change my ENFj gf for a ENTP girl....

(just kidding)