Results 1 to 26 of 26

Thread: ISFp needs some Se-love!

  1. #1
    Charismatik's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    63
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default ISFp needs some Se-love!

    It has come to my attention lately that I am withdrawing to a degree that makes me unhappy, and that I need to foster my Se a little more. I know I CAN do it because I have before, and once I get into the groove of things I'm fine. But right now I'm not, and I'd really appreciate a little advice from whoever feels they might have something that could help.

    If it helps, I think a reason I'm doing it is because I don't have many people close to me here at school. At home I do, but at school I keep letting myself get disillusioned with people too soon and peg them as 'inauthentic' or I start resenting when my semi-friends can predict me too well because I start feeling boxed in.

    A little advice? I know life's not worth living without other people- at least to ISFps- but for some reason I'm having trouble getting ouf of this rut.
    ISFp <3

  2. #2
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Charismatik View Post
    It has come to my attention lately that I am withdrawing to a degree that makes me unhappy, and that I need to foster my Se a little more. I know I CAN do it because I have before, and once I get into the groove of things I'm fine. But right now I'm not, and I'd really appreciate a little advice from whoever feels they might have something that could help.

    If it helps, I think a reason I'm doing it is because I don't have many people close to me here at school. At home I do, but at school I keep letting myself get disillusioned with people too soon and peg them as 'inauthentic' or I start resenting when my semi-friends can predict me too well because I start feeling boxed in.

    A little advice? I know life's not worth living without other people- at least to ISFps- but for some reason I'm having trouble getting ouf of this rut.
    I know what it's like... especially being in a rut. I peg a lot of people as 'inauthentic' as well. I think the reason is that that's the case.... there are a ton of inauthentic people.... plain and simple.....: ) BUT and I do mean but, there are a rediculous amount of amazing real people in this world too who are honest about who they are and who aren't out in this world being fake or trying to take advantage of others. And the key is to keep pushing to find those people... because they are out there. And if you hit a wall then push in a slightly different direction. I'm really not sure how well I could ever help you solve your problems on a forum, but hopefully you already know the answers to what you should do and just need a push to do what you think you should. Anyway, sorry I couldn't be of a bigger help.....:/ Good luck....: )
    Suomea

  3. #3
    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    TIM
    SEI
    Posts
    4,481
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Charismatik View Post
    It has come to my attention lately that I am withdrawing to a degree that makes me unhappy, and that I need to foster my Se a little more. I know I CAN do it because I have before, and once I get into the groove of things I'm fine. But right now I'm not, and I'd really appreciate a little advice from whoever feels they might have something that could help.

    If it helps, I think a reason I'm doing it is because I don't have many people close to me here at school. At home I do, but at school I keep letting myself get disillusioned with people too soon and peg them as 'inauthentic' or I start resenting when my semi-friends can predict me too well because I start feeling boxed in.

    A little advice? I know life's not worth living without other people- at least to ISFps- but for some reason I'm having trouble getting ouf of this rut.
    We can be friends, ok? I hope we can.

    It'd be fun, we could predict each other the whole day.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    USA.
    TIM
    INTj
    Posts
    4,497
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    you should go find one of those ENTps you hate and they will make you feel sooo competent, or find an INTj who will make you laugh and thus forget about troubles. I've found the way alpha works is by nudging things in a way that refocuses attention usually by laughter and magically it just disappears. I know an ISFp in real life and if i just do what she says i magically become happy. I give her a lot of advice that she listens to, but really i think they way I lift her spirits is just by being weird and funny. She always says, "youre so mean, *lol*"

    Edit: i think now you were more asking about how to trust people.. but i think all ruts are connected in the end. fix one problem you fix them all. one way isfps can recharge is to have alone time or by cooking for other people. it just makes them do something that comes naturally.. anything that gets you into *you* mode will refocus your energies into feeling insecure which is usually why people are distrustful of others in the first place.

  5. #5
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Haha..... anamericancer's advice is best..... you should take that.....
    Suomea

  6. #6
    Charismatik's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    63
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by anamericancer View Post
    I love you! Let's get married! Let's make babies!
    Haha... okay, deal! Yay, I found me an ENTp hubby!


    Quote Originally Posted by Kamangir View Post
    We can be friends, ok? I hope we can.

    It'd be fun, we could predict each other the whole day.
    And yes, I would definitely be up for that! Y'know I've never met another ISFp before in real life? Funny, isn't it? I didn't think we were THAT rare...


    Thanks for the love, guys, I feel a little better. I'm just in a funk and I can tell it has a lot to do with me just refusing to let my Se into the picture. Now that I have a fiance and a friend (hooray!) I think I'll be a little better off... haha. Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?
    ISFp <3

  7. #7
    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    TIM
    SEI
    Posts
    4,481
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?
    I just waited until I felt better. Or I relied on my friends.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

  8. #8

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    5,101
    Mentioned
    6 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Charismatik View Post
    Haha... okay, deal! Yay, I found me an ENTp hubby!
    I thought you have to be a guy to be called a hubby.

  9. #9
    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    TIM
    SEI
    Posts
    4,481
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cracka View Post
    I thought you have to be a guy to be called a hubby.
    Alpha love knows no bounds cracka. I thought you knew that, on account of your alpha origins.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

  10. #10
    PotatoSpirit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Bologna, Italy
    Posts
    637
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cracka View Post
    I thought you have to be a guy to be called a hubby.
    Oh I'm sure cancer can work the details out.
    LSI

  11. #11

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    5,101
    Mentioned
    6 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kamangir View Post
    Alpha love knows no bounds cracka. I thought you knew that, on account of your alpha origins.
    I'm not saying that there's any bounds to it, just the word hubby implies "guy" to me. Is there a female version of this word floating around that I should know or does it actually work correctly here?

  12. #12
    Gone. theMime.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    1,297
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington View Post
    anything that gets you into *you* mode will refocus your energies into feeling insecure which is usually why people are distrustful of others in the first place.

    wait ok so you mean when we get super focused on ourselves we get insecure and distrustful of others?

  13. #13
    Gone. theMime.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    1,297
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Charismatik View Post
    Haha... okay, deal! Yay, I found me an ENTp hubby!




    And yes, I would definitely be up for that! Y'know I've never met another ISFp before in real life? Funny, isn't it? I didn't think we were THAT rare...


    Thanks for the love, guys, I feel a little better. I'm just in a funk and I can tell it has a lot to do with me just refusing to let my Se into the picture. Now that I have a fiance and a friend (hooray!) I think I'll be a little better off... haha. Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?
    If you ever do meet an ISFp in person it will probably be like something out of the twilight zone....seriously, it was the weirdest thing when I got to know another ISFp in person...sometimes it even felt like I was hanging out with my clone. We're actually really different even tho we have the same type but it still felt like that.

    Rut? Yuuuuup I know what those are like. What I do is call every single one of my friends until at least one of them can hang out or at least just chat. And I find that when I need to be around people after spending too much time alone even just going to a public place with people I don't even know helps. Those things might also work for you.

    If you wanna boost your mood you can try doing a random act of kindness for someone...those usually always work for me...might work for you too. I also just stop thinking...this might sound crazy but when I just don't think my mood just naturally gets better. OH and try dwelling on positive things! Like think about all the things in your life that you're thankful for and all the things you appreciate about yourself.

    Sorry if none of this helps. Don't worry though you're rut will end...they always do. =) =)

    Oh and Suomea is right about amazing people in the world. =)

  14. #14
    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    TIM
    SEI
    Posts
    4,481
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    xD ISFp's are soooo positive about life and how great it is.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

  15. #15
    Luke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Salem, OR
    Posts
    110
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Why would an SiFe want more Se? Wouldn't that be Fe?

  16. #16
    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    TIM
    SEI
    Posts
    4,481
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Charismatik is mixed up in the world of MBTI and its' terminology, that's all.

    The MBTI profiles tell her that if you are an "unhealthy ISFP", you are allowing your dominant Fi to weaken your auxiliary Se.

    If you notice, that corresponds to a socionics ISFj. Which furthers the mystery, what did Charismatik mean?
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

  17. #17
    Luke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Salem, OR
    Posts
    110
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kamangir View Post
    Charismatik is mixed up in the world of MBTI and its' terminology, that's all.

    The MBTI profiles tell her that if you are an "unhealthy ISFP", you are allowing your dominant Fi to weaken your auxiliary Se.

    If you notice, that corresponds to a socionics ISFj. Which furthers the mystery, what did Charismatik mean?
    A SiFe needing more Fe? Or a FiSe needing more Se? Ah well, us loners all need friends.

  18. #18
    Gone. theMime.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    1,297
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Luke View Post
    A SiFe needing more Fe? Or a FiSe needing more Se? Ah well, us loners all need friends.
    HAHA well said!

  19. #19
    Haikus
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    MI
    TIM
    IEI-Ni
    Posts
    10,060
    Mentioned
    223 Post(s)
    Tagged
    2 Thread(s)

    Default

    You sure you're not INFp? INFp/INFjs/ISFp can all be pretty similiar.

    Anyway, I think what helps me the most is talking to somebody that understands me from a soul, deeper level and then makes me do it anyway. If you're just a brute or try to bully me into 'just doing it' that never works either. You really need to be able to express who you really are, which is hard for a lot of people... esp. if you sense your community might not accept you. I mean you're blaming yourself, but maybe it could just be them?

    If you don't want to talk to somebody, sometimes the problem isn't you.

    Like for example one of my ESTp friends will say (after crying and whining on each other's shoulder for 3 hours) "Get on a plane and come see me." As direct and forceful as that. And since I know she really gets me, I'll actually do things with her. Why are good-natured people always so forced to do things they don't like all the time? Blah.

  20. #20
    Charismatik's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    63
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kamangir View Post
    Charismatik is mixed up in the world of MBTI and its' terminology, that's all.

    The MBTI profiles tell her that if you are an "unhealthy ISFP", you are allowing your dominant Fi to weaken your auxiliary Se.

    If you notice, that corresponds to a socionics ISFj. Which furthers the mystery, what did Charismatik mean?
    ... really? How embarassing. The book I just read and loved claiming to be 'socionics' may not be as 'socionics' as I thought. And just when I thought I had it figured out a little! Heh.

    Oh well, I think you all caught my drift anyway.
    ISFp <3

  21. #21
    Kristiina's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Estonia, Tartu
    Posts
    4,021
    Mentioned
    5 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Maybe Charismatic will allow you to be the "wife"?
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
    New blog: http://having-a-kid.blogspot.com/

  22. #22
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiina View Post
    Maybe Charismatic will allow you to be the "wife"?

    Yeah Ana...... you're really giving up pretty quickly. Give her another chance.
    Suomea

  23. #23
    ~~rubicon~~ Rubicon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Chatbox
    TIM
    SEI, 9
    Posts
    5,268
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Charismatik View Post
    Any other ISFps out there who've dealt with this, though? How did you end up motivating yourself back into a happier place?
    I don't know about you, but when I've been down in the past there is always a reason for it, no exception - because I think we as ISFps are naturally pretty upbeat people. Maybe something that I'm feeling guilty about, a confrontation that I'm avoiding or something like that. It always works for me to bring this issue out in the open and think of a logical solution - or if I feel like I just can't deal with it by myself I'll talk it out with someone ... but I think letting it lie in your subconscious without dealing with it is dangerous. But anyway, I could be completely on the wrong track here ... but just letting you know what worked for me.
    "Language is the Rubicon that divides man from beast."

  24. #24
    Gone. theMime.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    1,297
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by chopin View Post
    I don't know about you, but when I've been down in the past there is always a reason for it, no exception - because I think we as ISFps are naturally pretty upbeat people. Maybe something that I'm feeling guilty about, a confrontation that I'm avoiding or something like that. It always works for me to bring this issue out in the open and think of a logical solution - or if I feel like I just can't deal with it by myself I'll talk it out with someone ... but I think letting it lie in your subconscious without dealing with it is dangerous. But anyway, I could be completely on the wrong track here ... but just letting you know what worked for me.
    agreed.

  25. #25
    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    TIM
    SEI
    Posts
    4,481
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by theMime. View Post
    agreed.
    agreed.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

  26. #26
    normal's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    nil
    TIM
    nil
    Posts
    975
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    i change my ENFj gf for a ENTP girl....

    (just kidding)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •