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Thread: IEI - SLE duality and ESTps being moody?

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    Question IEI - SLE duality and ESTps being moody?

    I have a question about the nature of the IEI /SLE duality. Two of my close friends are IEI and SLE duals, and my IEI friend, when I explained socionics to her raised a concern about the "moody" nature she perceives in her SLE friend. In her words, the friend's moods swing back and forth between elation and antisocial dejection (not the clinical kind or anything). And whereas I, and ILI, tend to handle the SLEs moods by being either apparently oblivious, or just by amusedly observing them, the IEI becomes frustrated in attempting to either soothe the SLEs worries or share in her emotional highs. She speak of "running after the SLEs mood swings" and having to "keep up with them", ultiately becoming extremely flustered and "exhausted."
    Is there anything in the SLEs phsycological type that would lead to moodiness, and what role would this play in the SLE/IEI duality? Or would you say this is a particularity of our friend?

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    ESTp's are always trying to save face, as you just said "to look tough."

    I've never noticed them acting moody at all, they seem like their emotions are under control 100% of the time. Am I not looking close enough, or are they not moody?
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    ESTps can be moody as fuck, but it's a different flavour than what we normally consider 'moody'. It's harder to ignore ESTp moodiness because it can involve flying objects.

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    ^ What he said, lol.
    "How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
    -- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

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    They are moody but it's very similar to my own brand. I can usually sense what's wrong and how to respond to it. I'm not entirely sure if that is due to duality or experience.

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    Okay, here comes a SLE's input:

    I always considered myself pretty even tempered, until I read this thread. Basically, what happens with the whole moods thing is that if I'm getting a lot of and , I'll be super elated for obvious reasons. Even if it's just a tiny bit of it, I'll still be happy.

    However, I often subconsciously expect to receive and to the point where a lack of it will almost certainly put me down in the dumps. The worst is when you're expecting a dose of and and you get the opposite instead. It's kind of like mild heroin in a sense.

    Anyways, so something has happened to a SLE's superego, and they're all down in the dumps. I'm pretty typical SLE in that I don't think I've ever actively seeked help in that regard. This is partially because of the fear of appearing weak, and also because I tend to do the whole "logical cover up" thing that glamourama was talking about. I realize that in an ideal world we'd all open up freely and things would be better, but it's really hard to bring myself to get help for an emotional thing. If someone notices that something's not right with me and they start interrogating me about it, I just get really pissed and am less inclined to open up. If you keep asking I'll probably make up something just to get you to shut up.

    So, the best way to deal with this whole moodiness thing would be to not get up in a SLE's face about it if they're acting weird or downcast. Do something that will help them realize that not everyone is out to get them, which basically means spending time with them. Don't try to bring up that there's something wrong with them, as that'll just make them close up like a hermit. If you are IEI or EIE, all you have to do is be natural around them and avoid putting them under any pressure to open up. Talk about things that are completely unrelated to what they're experiencing (if the mood is stemming from something that happened at school or work, don't bring up either of those at all unless the SLE does first). The best you can do is to avoid talking about anything negative at all. With that, it's usually just a matter of time before things will start to clear up again. The key is basically to get the SLE to realize that the situation is very temporary, and that there are other things and people out there that are really great.
    , Se-sub
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    I'm quite moody. I do go through periods of maximum elation, and then into periods of quiet introspection and observation, but I'm not that erratic.
    Ideas don't determine who's right. Power determines who's right. And I have the power. So I'm right.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Herzy View Post
    However, I often subconsciously expect to receive and to the point where a lack of it will almost certainly put me down in the dumps. The worst is when you're expecting a dose of and and you get the opposite instead. It's kind of like mild heroin in a sense.
    This is interesting.

    I know a SLE/SEE couple. The SEE isn't quite able to soothe the SLE's moods but she seems to manage them by being extra quiet and trying to anticipate his every need. He seems to appreciate it but it's obvious that it's not what he wants at all.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Isolda Biloruka View Post
    I have a question about the nature of the IEI /SLE duality. Two of my close friends are IEI and SLE duals, and my IEI friend, when I explained socionics to her raised a concern about the "moody" nature she perceives in her SLE friend. In her words, the friend's moods swing back and forth between elation and antisocial dejection (not the clinical kind or anything). And whereas I, and ILI, tend to handle the SLEs moods by being either apparently oblivious, or just by amusedly observing them, the IEI becomes frustrated in attempting to either soothe the SLEs worries or share in her emotional highs. She speak of "running after the SLEs mood swings" and having to "keep up with them", ultiately becoming extremely flustered and "exhausted."
    Is there anything in the SLEs phsycological type that would lead to moodiness, and what role would this play in the SLE/IEI duality? Or would you say this is a particularity of our friend?


    while light hearted, too, what good would an estp be if they weren't stormy. that's practically their beta membership badge.
    Lefty
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    Flying objects? What do you guys with experience recommend? Steel helmets or kevlar?
    INFp

    If your sea chart does not match reality, go with reality (Old mariner saying)



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    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
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    love man.

    All the world needs is love. <3.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

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    lol that's true
    INFp

    If your sea chart does not match reality, go with reality (Old mariner saying)



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    The best you can do is to avoid talking about anything negative at all. With that, it's usually just a matter of time before things will start to clear up again.
    Yeah I had a counselor once who always criticized me for trying to make things look too pretty and neat ((like I put a bow on things)) but I feel, it's just something that will make a lot of people happy...and SLEs seem to love it like you said. ;D

    If things get too serious and kind of moral message-y like...the later seasons of Buffy it makes me really uncomfortable. Like just lighten up already kinda thing.

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    In lighter news:

    Everytime an ESTp's cock slides into an INFp's hole, angels sing in heaven.

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    I think I love bulletsanddoves.
    Haha. Good. I love me too, I mean thank you... I dunno, something about this place just brings out the little kid in me. *shrug*

    Shhh we have to be careful cause Expat is weak against my bright and violent porn star take to things and we might give him an annerism. (sp?)

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    who doesn't like estp cock? I mean especially when they act all cocky and like they have control you know....and when they spit on your face!!

    Poor weak nerdy INTj men...you just don't have the raw, masculine energy that ESTp dicks do! Sucks to be you.

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    hahahahahaha @ the turn this thread took. unfortunately, I don't have a penis, so I can't testify here what it's like to have a SLE cock.
    , Se-sub
    8w8-3w8-7w8 sx/sx

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulletsAndDoves View Post
    Yeah I had a counselor once who always criticized me for trying to make things look too pretty and neat ((like I put a bow on things)) but I feel, it's just something that will make a lot of people happy...and SLEs seem to love it like you said. ;D
    so true! The SLE I know also has this seemingly compulsive need to "prettify" things...things like typing formal emails in purple
    ILI

    ¿Qué es la vida? Un frenesí.
    ¿Qué es la vida? Una ilusión;
    una sombra, una ficción
    y el mayor bien es pequeño.
    ¡Que toda la vida es sueño
    y los sueños, sueños son!

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