Results 1 to 27 of 27

Thread: Where to find/meet ILIs-INTps?

  1. #1
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Where to find/meet ILIs-INTps?

    In the "Where do SEEs go?" thread, ILIs comment on how and where to find SEEs but my question is where do us SEEs find ILIs? I feel like it's much harder for us to find you guys than for you guys to find us just because of our interests and the nature of our functions- our interests make us more likely to be out in the real world than ILIs. So question #1- where can we find us some ILIs? Question#2- do you think we could work together as duals realistically IRL? Yes, we're duals and theoretically we can and should be able to work, but I feel as if out of all the duals, we have the most difficulties in making it work IRL because of our different interests and the nature of our types. Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  2. #2
    Quirk Satellite Div.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Out of range. Please call your service provider.
    Posts
    424
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    First thing, if you want an ILI, leave some extra space in the situation depicted in the picture so an ILI doesn't feel too claustrophobic. They don't liken to crowds very easily, so let them ease in, and then surprise them with some to show them that you care.


    To answer #2, I do think the SEE-ILIs can make good friends, but I can't see a long-term sexual or romantic relationship working out. To answer #3, nope.
    PoLR
    Suggestive Function

    Regular Double-shot Espresso Subtype

    Just because I'm a thinking type doesn't mean I'm not an idiot.

  3. #3
    crazedrat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    moon
    Posts
    4,885
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    ILIs are rare, and strong ILIs are even more rare. It is like asking where to find gold to dig for, you just have to start digging and get lucky. I really don't know where to find them.. it varies. The simple answer would be: At home.. the second answer would be like... maybe in the library, in engineering buildings, mathematics buildings, in science buildings... You could try there. If you're good with VI you could work it out. ILIs are easy fish to hook if you're a SEE.. you may not know we're hooked. But we are. Just don't leave us alone. Other then this I suggest you aim for SLIs if you want to be realistic.. if you do happen to run into an ILI, go for it. Don't think too much, be yourself. No warning or pre-adjusted thought process is necessary for the interaction
    My girlfriend is SEE. But I had to find her, with my knowledge of typology to help me out. It's such a fun relationship, I don't think it will ever die out.
    We're the most passionate type, our relationship is the most real and most intense.
    IMO
    It can cause problems, being real with one another.. showing your full mind.
    HMM..
    Yeah, hope for ILI but aim for SLIs is the best advice for you
    Or you could find some on the socionics forums and get talking to them, then stalk them down
    INTp

  4. #4
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by crazedrat
    ILIs are rare, and strong ILIs are even more rare. It is like asking where to find gold to dig for, you just have to start digging and get lucky. I really don't know where to find them.. it varies. The simple answer would be: At home.. the second answer would be like... maybe in the library, in engineering buildings, mathematics buildings, in science buildings... You could try there. If you're good with VI you could work it out. ILIs are easy fish to hook if you're a SEE.. you may not know we're hooked. But we are. Just don't leave us alone. Other then this I suggest you aim for SLIs if you want to be realistic.. if you do happen to run into an ILI, go for it. Don't think too much, be yourself. No warning or pre-adjusted thought process is necessary for the interaction
    My girlfriend is SEE. But I had to find her, with my knowledge of typology to help me out. It's such a fun relationship, I don't think it will ever die out.
    We're the most passionate type, our relationship is the most real and most intense.
    IMO
    It can cause problems, being real with one another.. showing your full mind.
    HMM..
    Yeah, hope for ILI but aim for SLIs is the best advice for you
    Or you could find some on the socionics forums and get talking to them, then stalk them down
    haha true. awww that's so cute & good for u guys! hope it works out (which it will)! booo SLIs aren't as interesting as ILIs to me... I would get too bored too easily. I agree with you on the whole being too real thing- that may be where the / s have it right... it's sometime's good to be able to hold back... but that's jibberish to us. We always work through it though

    the thing is even if i were to go to the science building wud i just walk right up to a supposed ILI and be like- yo, let's bang- right here, right now... just take off ur pocket protector first... haha i mean really?

    wow i just realized how p i am by going completely out of the order of ur points into some random, ridiculous order
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  5. #5
    crazedrat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    moon
    Posts
    4,885
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    No, you'd just ask his name and start flirting with him like you SEEs are so good at. And you wouldn't make it uncomfortable for you... simultaneously you keep it comfortable for him. You must follow your self. It helps me to imagine how I was in middle school, in relations.. return my mind to a state of innocence, unfiltered by experience... this helps me to interact with SEEs more naturally.

    He would probably be alone... really, we aren't hard fish to catch. So just go up to him and sit down.

    Try the engineering building for a week or two; and actuallly try... and I suspect you will find success.
    I hope you're good at VI, and other forms of identification.. I use my emotions and particularly my emotional reactions to the person to gauge their type.
    Anyway, I wouldn't want you to get stuck with fools gold... some nerd loser who isn't ILI, but kinda seems like it

    You could even come up with a scheme to lure in an ILI.. Hmm.
    A pitch. You would have to get creative with that... I am thinking of the scenario where the ILI is inaccessible and in his own world, maybe even just walking down the hall.. and you have to run up and say something. You need leverage in that situation.
    How old are you btw? In college... hopefully, for this all to work out.
    Anyway, an excuse for interaction may help at the beginning. Some kind of prop or lied about scenario which draws his attention and demands a response.. and some kind of interaction.

    If you are really desperate make some kind of flyer or pamplet which you're advertising something or other.. an event, trying to get him to sign something, come to a club, or a concert..... etc. then just start talking to him.

    A concert would work. Say you're trying to get people to come to this concert... (it can be a real one). Have a pamplet for it. They actually will probably have a shitload of flyers near some concert hall, just grab some. Then ask him if he ever goes anywhere..??
    Then you're talking about his personal life, there you have it
    Just try to keep it natural and real.
    You can be aggressive with us, we will go with the flow usually.

    I mean, if he asks a logically penetrating question you could even try being honest..
    "Come smoke a cigarette with me"
    "why do you want me to go with you"
    "Because I am bored, it doesn't matter just come"...
    Honesty works too you know.
    If a SEE said that to me, I would come
    INTp

  6. #6

    Default

    Let me give you some firsthand experience here as an INTp male (or ILI, I guess we're all using that notation now.) I'm not saying all INTps act like me, and your interactions with various ones will no doubt be various, but I can at least give you a good example (I've had years to think about my relationships and being INTp.)

    It's hard for me to tell exactly what the ESFp I was with at one time really thought about me, but from what she has told me, I don't react in a "normal" way. She was the type of person who liked to poke at you or rouse you up or try to "annoy" you. I, in return, would just sit there and pretty much take it, reacting with I guess what would be considered being ticked off in a "cute" way (sort of hard to explain, but it's completely non-serious annoyance but seems serious, if that makes any sense.) I guess most other people have this sort of "personal space" defined that no one, no matter how close, can penetrate, but for her and I, no such "space" existed. That's sort of how I always defined the INTp-ESFp relationship, that it is marked by a lack of mental/physical/emotional barriers and involves a constant push-pull, where the ESFp takes pleasure in trying to get the INTp to react in some way, the INTp holding off on a reaction for as long as possible. This girl never made me feel shy, and I feel that that, if I had to choose one thing, is what I long for in a relationship. But the relationship is over now; she was sort of, well, fucked up, to say the least, and we were too different in interests, life background, lifestyle, etc. Just goes to show that even though you may be perfectly matched up in interaction style, if you don't share something in common, it won't work out, regardless of Socionics.

    With that in mind, if you want to find INTps, believe me, they are everywhere in every place. Try looking hard in your own field of interest. I guarantee you'll find something there. And don't buy into the shy, nerdy stereotype; we can be quite forward, oh yes. :wink:

  7. #7
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by crazedrat
    No, you'd just ask his name and start flirting with him like you SEEs are so good at. And you wouldn't make it uncomfortable for you... simultaneously you keep it comfortable for him. You must follow your self. It helps me to imagine how I was in middle school, in relations.. return my mind to a state of innocence, unfiltered by experience... this helps me to interact with SEEs more naturally.

    He would probably be alone... really, we aren't hard fish to catch. So just go up to him and sit down.

    Try the engineering building for a week or two; and actuallly try... and I suspect you will find success.
    I hope you're good at VI, and other forms of identification.. I use my emotions and particularly my emotional reactions to the person to gauge their type.
    Anyway, I wouldn't want you to get stuck with fools gold... some nerd loser who isn't ILI, but kinda seems like it

    You could even come up with a scheme to lure in an ILI.. Hmm.
    A pitch. You would have to get creative with that... I am thinking of the scenario where the ILI is inaccessible and in his own world, maybe even just walking down the hall.. and you have to run up and say something. You need leverage in that situation.
    How old are you btw? In college... hopefully, for this all to work out.
    Anyway, an excuse for interaction may help at the beginning. Some kind of prop or lied about scenario which draws his attention and demands a response.. and some kind of interaction.

    If you are really desperate make some kind of flyer or pamplet which you're advertising something or other.. an event, trying to get him to sign something, come to a club, or a concert..... etc. then just start talking to him.

    A concert would work. Say you're trying to get people to come to this concert... (it can be a real one). Have a pamplet for it. They actually will probably have a shitload of flyers near some concert hall, just grab some. Then ask him if he ever goes anywhere..??
    Then you're talking about his personal life, there you have it
    Just try to keep it natural and real.
    You can be aggressive with us, we will go with the flow usually.

    I mean, if he asks a logically penetrating question you could even try being honest..
    "Come smoke a cigarette with me"
    "why do you want me to go with you"
    "Because I am bored, it doesn't matter just come"...
    Honesty works too you know.
    If a SEE said that to me, I would come
    Haha I'm seriously going to try this!! I'll keep you posted and let you know how it's going. Yeah, I'm in college- the engineering building is kind of a treck from my apartment but I'll do it goshdarnit! Haha yeah that whole conversation is pretty much how we work.
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  8. #8
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by kabure
    Let me give you some firsthand experience here as an INTp male (or ILI, I guess we're all using that notation now.) I'm not saying all INTps act like me, and your interactions with various ones will no doubt be various, but I can at least give you a good example (I've had years to think about my relationships and being INTp.)

    It's hard for me to tell exactly what the ESFp I was with at one time really thought about me, but from what she has told me, I don't react in a "normal" way. She was the type of person who liked to poke at you or rouse you up or try to "annoy" you. I, in return, would just sit there and pretty much take it, reacting with I guess what would be considered being ticked off in a "cute" way (sort of hard to explain, but it's completely non-serious annoyance but seems serious, if that makes any sense.) I guess most other people have this sort of "personal space" defined that no one, no matter how close, can penetrate, but for her and I, no such "space" existed. That's sort of how I always defined the INTp-ESFp relationship, that it is marked by a lack of mental/physical/emotional barriers and involves a constant push-pull, where the ESFp takes pleasure in trying to get the INTp to react in some way, the INTp holding off on a reaction for as long as possible. This girl never made me feel shy, and I feel that that, if I had to choose one thing, is what I long for in a relationship. But the relationship is over now; she was sort of, well, fucked up, to say the least, and we were too different in interests, life background, lifestyle, etc. Just goes to show that even though you may be perfectly matched up in interaction style, if you don't share something in common, it won't work out, regardless of Socionics.

    With that in mind, if you want to find INTps, believe me, they are everywhere in every place. Try looking hard in your own field of interest. I guarantee you'll find something there. And don't buy into the shy, nerdy stereotype; we can be quite forward, oh yes. :wink:
    WOW- what i just bolded is our relationship PERFECTLY described- awesome job dude! I TOTALLY understand you're whole making fun of thing too! I think it's the aggressor-victim thing... u guys kinda like it in a wierd way haha. I started to feel bad about kinda being mean to my ILI friend and asked him if it bothered him and he didn't even know what I was talking about- it's so wierd how duals work like that. I had an EII boyfriend for a few years and it would upset him almost to the point of tears when I would poke fun at him when really that's how I joke around! Yeah we definitely have ZERO barriers of any kind when we're together which is what makes us so awesome!

    I'm not sure what happened with your SEE, but try not to hold a grudge or anything against her- we're all crazy mofo's who do retarted things. We just need someone to love us regardless and love us more because of these things. That is one of the problems that I can foresee with the SEE-ILI duality. Because you guys have N as your first function it's hard to forget the past and thus a tendency to hold grudges, and us, though we may try to hold grudges ultimately can't. She's probably forgotten all about it and misses you as a friend. If you feel like it's worth it for you to work it out you should! Sorry if this is crossing the line a little bit, I'm just speaking from my own personal experience.

    Thanks for the advice!
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  9. #9
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    In the "Where do SEEs go?" thread, ILIs comment on how and where to find SEEs but my question is where do us SEEs find ILIs? I feel like it's much harder for us to find you guys than for you guys to find us just because of our interests and the nature of our functions- our interests make us more likely to be out in the real world than ILIs. So question #1- where can we find us some ILIs? Question#2- do you think we could work together as duals realistically IRL? Yes, we're duals and theoretically we can and should be able to work, but I feel as if out of all the duals, we have the most difficulties in making it work IRL because of our different interests and the nature of our types. Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    1) You can find some ILI's when you go out, they are the silent ones...
    It seems you could find many on chess clubs or fantasy board games I've been told...
    Many can be found on the internet too I guess

    2) Yes it could work out wonderful as I've experienced myself (if I didn't mess up we would have certainly married and live long and happely)

    3) Yes, check the answer at question 2.

    I really think you are doing a good thing to find yourself an ILI. Dual relationships can be so magically good.

    The only advice I can give you is that not all ILI's are the same, some are nice, some are arrogant, some like to party, some like to read...

    Looking at your knowledge, age and determination I would say the odds are way in your favour of finding a good ILI man.

  10. #10
    BLauritson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Bristol, England
    Posts
    979
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    So question #1- where can we find us some ILIs?
    I know one ESFp who I met through a dating website, and know/have known 6 ESFps through my workplace. To be honest, I don't think there's any sure-fire place where you're going to find a certain type, because whether due to interests or for other reasons, you can potentially find any type in any place. You probably wouldn't expect to find INTps in retail for example (IMO a very heavily Fe job sector), yet I spent 2 years working there purely because I couldn't get a job in any other kind of sector whilst I was at college. As a close ESFp friend of mine has said to me before, you can't force love to happen. It happens when it's due to happen and you can't alter it. Perhaps this is true, perhaps it isn't (certainly was in my case, but others may disagree).

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Question#2- do you think we could work together as duals realistically IRL? Yes, we're duals and theoretically we can and should be able to work, but I feel as if out of all the duals, we have the most difficulties in making it work IRL because of our different interests and the nature of our types.
    Yes I definitely think it would work. Remember that all duals are opposite-natured to eachother - it's what makes them duals. Think Yin and Yang - two opposite yet codependent entities. And not all interests are necessarily type-related - I actually have some common interests with an ESFj I work with. Granted, they are relatively superficial interests, but a person's type will never limit their interests. By the same token, two people of the same type can be very different people beneath the surface. Or on the surface. Or mid-way between the shallow and deep aspects of the personality ocean. But my point is, just because you might have trouble making it work with one INTp, it doesn't mean you'll never make it work with any INTp, it just means you haven't found the right one yet.

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    Unfortunately that one I can't answer. Well, my current girlfriend (if that IS the case) is an ESFp, but there's 160 miles and business of life between us, so this one's a terrible example there. I'm not even sure if she even considers there to be a relationship still; I'll have to ask her about that at some point. If I can ever summon up the courage to do so.

    Anyway's m'dear, my final words on this matter: Don't overstretch yourself in search of the perfect partner. Quite often people will have several failed relationships before they do meet the right one, but it's from those failed relationships that people learn and grow within themselves. And it's quite likely that your perfect partner will go through quite the same experience before meeting you. Rather than looking straight away for "the one", just lay back more and take up what opportunities come along. I don't mean that in the sense of just go with whatever you can get - still keep your standards and all that, perhaps with Socionics you can help to avoid relationships that would actually be harmful, but just have fun with relationships - you never know, you might bump into Mr Right when you least expect it. And that's another reason not to look too hard - because if you do, you might end up missing opportunities.

    Hope this helps.
    ILI (Indescribable Lovemaking Inc.)
    5w4 so/sx

    "IP temperament! Because today's concerns are tomorrow's indifferences!"

    Lord Fnorgle's Domain - A slowly growing collection of music, poetry and literature.
    Stickam music performances

  11. #11
    XoX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    4,407
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    liveandletlive, first a warning which has been told around here so many times: many people who claim to be ILIs around here are possibly not. So don't listen to everyone who has ILI or INTp in their signature.

    Second, I have seen successful ESFp / INTp couples but not at the age of <20. Teenage and even early 20+ ESFps and INTps seem pretty much incompatible. Only when INTps grow out of their all knowing schizoid-autistic prick stage and ESFps finally realize what a real human relationship is about they start to match. I can see how psychologically stable 30+ years old ESFp and INTp make an awesome match. ESFp is much more calmer and concentrated and INTp is much more social and lovable than at younger age. They appreciate each other's skills and personalities a lot more and become more "Gamma-like" i.e. want to concentrate on the "prosper with family" thing.

  12. #12
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    In the "Where do SEEs go?" thread, ILIs comment on how and where to find SEEs but my question is where do us SEEs find ILIs? I feel like it's much harder for us to find you guys than for you guys to find us just because of our interests and the nature of our functions- our interests make us more likely to be out in the real world than ILIs. So question #1- where can we find us some ILIs? Question#2- do you think we could work together as duals realistically IRL? Yes, we're duals and theoretically we can and should be able to work, but I feel as if out of all the duals, we have the most difficulties in making it work IRL because of our different interests and the nature of our types. Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    1) You can find some ILI's when you go out, they are the silent ones...
    It seems you could find many on chess clubs or fantasy board games I've been told...
    Many can be found on the internet too I guess

    2) Yes it could work out wonderful as I've experienced myself (if I didn't mess up we would have certainly married and live long and happely)

    3) Yes, check the answer at question 2.

    I really think you are doing a good thing to find yourself an ILI. Dual relationships can be so magically good.

    The only advice I can give you is that not all ILI's are the same, some are nice, some are arrogant, some like to party, some like to read...

    Looking at your knowledge, age and determination I would say the odds are way in your favour of finding a good ILI man.
    awww im sry jarno- i'm sure everything will work out good for u in the end... there's a lot of us SEEs out there too ya no! btw, look at the advice i gave to kabure before about us SEEs... maybe it'll help you figure sum stuff out
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  13. #13
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BLauritson
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    So question #1- where can we find us some ILIs?
    I know one ESFp who I met through a dating website, and know/have known 6 ESFps through my workplace. To be honest, I don't think there's any sure-fire place where you're going to find a certain type, because whether due to interests or for other reasons, you can potentially find any type in any place. You probably wouldn't expect to find INTps in retail for example (IMO a very heavily Fe job sector), yet I spent 2 years working there purely because I couldn't get a job in any other kind of sector whilst I was at college. As a close ESFp friend of mine has said to me before, you can't force love to happen. It happens when it's due to happen and you can't alter it. Perhaps this is true, perhaps it isn't (certainly was in my case, but others may disagree).

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Question#2- do you think we could work together as duals realistically IRL? Yes, we're duals and theoretically we can and should be able to work, but I feel as if out of all the duals, we have the most difficulties in making it work IRL because of our different interests and the nature of our types.
    Yes I definitely think it would work. Remember that all duals are opposite-natured to eachother - it's what makes them duals. Think Yin and Yang - two opposite yet codependent entities. And not all interests are necessarily type-related - I actually have some common interests with an ESFj I work with. Granted, they are relatively superficial interests, but a person's type will never limit their interests. By the same token, two people of the same type can be very different people beneath the surface. Or on the surface. Or mid-way between the shallow and deep aspects of the personality ocean. But my point is, just because you might have trouble making it work with one INTp, it doesn't mean you'll never make it work with any INTp, it just means you haven't found the right one yet.

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    Unfortunately that one I can't answer. Well, my current girlfriend (if that IS the case) is an ESFp, but there's 160 miles and business of life between us, so this one's a terrible example there. I'm not even sure if she even considers there to be a relationship still; I'll have to ask her about that at some point. If I can ever summon up the courage to do so.

    Anyway's m'dear, my final words on this matter: Don't overstretch yourself in search of the perfect partner. Quite often people will have several failed relationships before they do meet the right one, but it's from those failed relationships that people learn and grow within themselves. And it's quite likely that your perfect partner will go through quite the same experience before meeting you. Rather than looking straight away for "the one", just lay back more and take up what opportunities come along. I don't mean that in the sense of just go with whatever you can get - still keep your standards and all that, perhaps with Socionics you can help to avoid relationships that would actually be harmful, but just have fun with relationships - you never know, you might bump into Mr Right when you least expect it. And that's another reason not to look too hard - because if you do, you might end up missing opportunities.

    Hope this helps.
    aww thanks B, it did! 1st off, you work with 6 ESFps?! Where do u work? u must be in heaven! haha i would love going to work everyday if there were 6 ILIs waiting for me ! 2nd of all, I'm sry about ur maybe ESFp gf. It strikes me as odd that she hasn't brought this up first... but yeah u shud def talk to her about it- your opinions mean a lot to her especially regarding your relationship. Plus, you need to know where you stand too! Who knows, maybe one day you'll be walking down the street and a hot ESFp girl will come strolling by how would you know if you could make a move or not? Thanks for the advice on looking for some ILIs... i think i mite look for a week just as a kind of experiment, but i wouldn't like hunt, attack, and capture an ILI or anything... or smear war paint on my face like: "ILI- you come here- now!" thanks for the advice though- keep me updated about how everything works out for ya!
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  14. #14
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by XoX
    liveandletlive, first a warning which has been told around here so many times: many people who claim to be ILIs around here are possibly not. So don't listen to everyone who has ILI or INTp in their signature.

    Second, I have seen successful ESFp / INTp couples but not at the age of <20. Teenage and even early 20+ ESFps and INTps seem pretty much incompatible. Only when INTps grow out of their all knowing schizoid-autistic prick stage and ESFps finally realize what a real human relationship is about they start to match. I can see how psychologically stable 30+ years old ESFp and INTp make an awesome match. ESFp is much more calmer and concentrated and INTp is much more social and lovable than at younger age. They appreciate each other's skills and personalities a lot more and become more "Gamma-like" i.e. want to concentrate on the "prosper with family" thing.
    ahhh now im paranoid there's some LIIs in ILI clothing *dun, dun, dun!* haha thanks for the heads up though. Thanks for giving me hope about a future dual relationship!
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  15. #15
    XoX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    4,407
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Quote Originally Posted by XoX
    liveandletlive, first a warning which has been told around here so many times: many people who claim to be ILIs around here are possibly not. So don't listen to everyone who has ILI or INTp in their signature.

    Second, I have seen successful ESFp / INTp couples but not at the age of <20. Teenage and even early 20+ ESFps and INTps seem pretty much incompatible. Only when INTps grow out of their all knowing schizoid-autistic prick stage and ESFps finally realize what a real human relationship is about they start to match. I can see how psychologically stable 30+ years old ESFp and INTp make an awesome match. ESFp is much more calmer and concentrated and INTp is much more social and lovable than at younger age. They appreciate each other's skills and personalities a lot more and become more "Gamma-like" i.e. want to concentrate on the "prosper with family" thing.
    ahhh now im paranoid there's some LIIs in ILI clothing *dun, dun, dun!* haha thanks for the heads up though. Thanks for giving me hope about a future dual relationship!
    Oh and about ESFp - ISTp relationships. I can't see them working well. Even if they in theory should not be that bad. From what I've seen they seem to be extremely passivating for both parties. I believe it was you who talked about this at some point. I might misremember though. Then again ESFp - ISFj seems to be a pretty common relationship. They have some problems because of completely opposite temperaments but somehow they seem to be drawn to each other. Much more than ESFp - ISTp anyways.

    Edit: Oh and it is good to be a little paranoid. It keeps your senses alert.

  16. #16
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by XoX
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Quote Originally Posted by XoX
    liveandletlive, first a warning which has been told around here so many times: many people who claim to be ILIs around here are possibly not. So don't listen to everyone who has ILI or INTp in their signature.

    Second, I have seen successful ESFp / INTp couples but not at the age of <20. Teenage and even early 20+ ESFps and INTps seem pretty much incompatible. Only when INTps grow out of their all knowing schizoid-autistic prick stage and ESFps finally realize what a real human relationship is about they start to match. I can see how psychologically stable 30+ years old ESFp and INTp make an awesome match. ESFp is much more calmer and concentrated and INTp is much more social and lovable than at younger age. They appreciate each other's skills and personalities a lot more and become more "Gamma-like" i.e. want to concentrate on the "prosper with family" thing.
    ahhh now im paranoid there's some LIIs in ILI clothing *dun, dun, dun!* haha thanks for the heads up though. Thanks for giving me hope about a future dual relationship!
    Oh and about ESFp - ISTp relationships. I can't see them working well. Even if they in theory should not be that bad. From what I've seen they seem to be extremely passivating for both parties. I believe it was you who talked about this at some point. I might misremember though. Then again ESFp - ISFj seems to be a pretty common relationship. They have some problems because of completely opposite temperaments but somehow they seem to be drawn to each other. Much more than ESFp - ISTp anyways.

    Edit: Oh and it is good to be a little paranoid. It keeps your senses alert.
    yeah i def agree with u on the whole ISTp thing. I think i'd actually prefer an IEI before an ESI- if socionics has taught me anything it's that i need a little in my life
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  17. #17
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,626
    Mentioned
    156 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    I know 2 SEE ILI relationships.

    One of the two, I put my finger in it to make it start. Once started it had really no problem at all working. They met at school. The SEE though is a bit strange version of SEE - she's extremely extraverted but also a slightly insular person, meaning that she can spend a lot of time only working and seeing her boyfriend/family. The ILI otoh is somewhat a busy person because has some positions of responsibility at university. They live togheter now. I notice the ILI is very tolerant (from my perspective) of SEE's periodic aggressivness, I would always fight back whereas they tend not to care.

    The other of the two seem to be more typical. The ILI is nerdy, likes videogames, board games and card games. Even though, he's also a very good looking guy even if he takes zero care of his appearance. The SEE is a preppy party-goer. It is very interesting to see them interact, the ILI brings up a Magic or Yu-Gi-Ho card and starts blabbering about it, while the SEE will start commenting on the physical features of the character
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  18. #18
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Re: SEEs & ILIs in reality?

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Question #3- do you know of any SEE-ILI couples IRL, how do they make it work if at all? I needs to find me a good ILI man
    I know 2 SEE ILI relationships.

    One of the two, I put my finger in it to make it start. Once started it had really no problem at all working. They met at school. The SEE though is a bit strange version of SEE - she's extremely extraverted but also a slightly insular person, meaning that she can spend a lot of time only working and seeing her boyfriend/family. The ILI otoh is somewhat a busy person because has some positions of responsibility at university. They live togheter now. I notice the ILI is very tolerant (from my perspective) of SEE's periodic aggressivness, I would always fight back whereas they tend not to care.

    The other of the two seem to be more typical. The ILI is nerdy, likes videogames, board games and card games. Even though, he's also a very good looking guy even if he takes zero care of his appearance. The SEE is a preppy party-goer. It is very interesting to see them interact, the ILI brings up a Magic or Yu-Gi-Ho card and starts blabbering about it, while the SEE will start commenting on the physical features of the character
    haha awww they seem so cute!
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  19. #19
    BLauritson's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Bristol, England
    Posts
    979
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    1st off, you work with 6 ESFps?! Where do u work? u must be in heaven! haha i would love going to work everyday if there were 6 ILIs waiting for me !
    lol, well, at the moment it's 4 ESFps technically, since one of them no longer works there and one of them happens to be the chairman. But yeah, it's pretty great . I just work in an office doing office-like work . Lol, not that much to say about it really.

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    2nd of all, I'm sry about ur maybe ESFp gf. It strikes me as odd that she hasn't brought this up first... but yeah u shud def talk to her about it- your opinions mean a lot to her especially regarding your relationship. Plus, you need to know where you stand too!
    Yeah, well, with the distance between us it would be impossible to work anyway. Either way I'm looking to end it with her, but that's why I need to make sure she still thinks there's a relationship there first - I don't want to look like an idiot by saying I'd end it with her only to find out there was nothing there in the first place (in her mind anyway). We'll see.

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Who knows, maybe one day you'll be walking down the street and a hot ESFp girl will come strolling by how would you know if you could make a move or not?
    lol, well, I'm not jumping to any conclusions but I've already got an idea of what might happen at some point in the not too distant future, although I won't say any more on here. I'll tell you more in PM if you're interested though.

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    Thanks for the advice on looking for some ILIs... i think i mite look for a week just as a kind of experiment, but i wouldn't like hunt, attack, and capture an ILI or anything... or smear war paint on my face like: "ILI- you come here- now!" thanks for the advice though- keep me updated about how everything works out for ya!
    heh, well, I hope it all works out well for you. And I'll be sure to keep you updated
    ILI (Indescribable Lovemaking Inc.)
    5w4 so/sx

    "IP temperament! Because today's concerns are tomorrow's indifferences!"

    Lord Fnorgle's Domain - A slowly growing collection of music, poetry and literature.
    Stickam music performances

  20. #20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    the thing is even if i were to go to the science building wud i just walk right up to a supposed ILI and be like- yo, let's bang- right here, right now... just take off ur pocket protector first... haha i mean really?
    That was actually tested once, outside a college. About 50% of men agreed. And 0% of women They didn't have sex though, they just tested if people would agree.
    ...the human race will disappear. Other races will appear and disappear in turn. The sky will become icy and void, pierced by the feeble light of half-dead stars. Which will also disappear. Everything will disappear. And what human beings do is just as free of sense as the free motion of elementary particles. Good, evil, morality, feelings? Pure 'Victorian fictions'.

    INTp

  21. #21
    Jarno's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Netherlands
    TIM
    ILI-Te
    Posts
    5,375
    Mentioned
    30 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Warlord
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    the thing is even if i were to go to the science building wud i just walk right up to a supposed ILI and be like- yo, let's bang- right here, right now... just take off ur pocket protector first... haha i mean really?
    That was actually tested once, outside a college. About 50% of men agreed. And 0% of women They didn't have sex though, they just tested if people would agree.
    haha, I've read that test also, isn't it out of the book Cheap Psychological Tricks For Lovers? (not that I read that kind of stuff ofcourse :wink: )

    It also claimed that when you say to a girl: "I've noticed you and find you attracting, would you like to date with me", gives you a 50% chance on YES.

  22. #22
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Warlord
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    the thing is even if i were to go to the science building wud i just walk right up to a supposed ILI and be like- yo, let's bang- right here, right now... just take off ur pocket protector first... haha i mean really?
    That was actually tested once, outside a college. About 50% of men agreed. And 0% of women They didn't have sex though, they just tested if people would agree.
    haha i heard that too... kinda disturbing. too bad they didn't try to type the participants.
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  23. #23

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    Quote Originally Posted by Warlord
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    the thing is even if i were to go to the science building wud i just walk right up to a supposed ILI and be like- yo, let's bang- right here, right now... just take off ur pocket protector first... haha i mean really?
    That was actually tested once, outside a college. About 50% of men agreed. And 0% of women They didn't have sex though, they just tested if people would agree.
    haha, I've read that test also, isn't it out of the book Cheap Psychological Tricks For Lovers? (not that I read that kind of stuff ofcourse :wink: )
    I saw it in a scene in a tv-document, but it was probably based on that book. The girl wasn't even trying to seduce the guys, she asked it like she was just asking for a light or something. The guy however was trying bit harder.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    It also claimed that when you say to a girl: "I've noticed you and find you attracting, would you like to date with me", gives you a 50% chance on YES.
    Heh, that's interesting too
    ...the human race will disappear. Other races will appear and disappear in turn. The sky will become icy and void, pierced by the feeble light of half-dead stars. Which will also disappear. Everything will disappear. And what human beings do is just as free of sense as the free motion of elementary particles. Good, evil, morality, feelings? Pure 'Victorian fictions'.

    INTp

  24. #24
    liveandletlive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    1,290
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Warlord
    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    Quote Originally Posted by Warlord
    Quote Originally Posted by liveandletlive
    the thing is even if i were to go to the science building wud i just walk right up to a supposed ILI and be like- yo, let's bang- right here, right now... just take off ur pocket protector first... haha i mean really?
    That was actually tested once, outside a college. About 50% of men agreed. And 0% of women They didn't have sex though, they just tested if people would agree.
    haha, I've read that test also, isn't it out of the book Cheap Psychological Tricks For Lovers? (not that I read that kind of stuff ofcourse :wink: )
    I saw it in a scene in a tv-document, but it was probably based on that book. The girl wasn't even trying to seduce the guys, she asked it like she was just asking for a light or something. The guy however was trying bit harder.

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    It also claimed that when you say to a girl: "I've noticed you and find you attracting, would you like to date with me", gives you a 50% chance on YES.
    Heh, that's interesting too
    ooo i wanna see it! haha i wonder if they were to do it with each of the types asking people first of all the gender differences between each type of people responding yes to them and also the type differences of people responding yes... y'all know i'd OWN that shit!
    ESFp-Fi sub
    6w7 sx/so/sp

  25. #25
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,626
    Mentioned
    156 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    It also claimed that when you say to a girl: "I've noticed you and find you attracting, would you like to date with me", gives you a 50% chance on YES.
    That's because 50 percent of people are above average in terms of attractivness
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  26. #26
    crazedrat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    moon
    Posts
    4,885
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    well that's probably not quite why, but yeah okay
    INTp

  27. #27
    XoX's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    4,407
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by Jarno
    It also claimed that when you say to a girl: "I've noticed you and find you attracting, would you like to date with me", gives you a 50% chance on YES.
    That's because 50 percent of people are above average in terms of attractivness
    above median

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •