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Thread: Are these two ESFj?

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    Default Are these two ESFj?

    I only know one ESFj for certain, and she's not young. So I'm wondering what ESFjs would be like if they were around my age. I know two people that I think could be... or maybe they're something else.

    The blond one is a high school friend who took a lot of shit for 3 things: whining, talking, and her daddy's money. She never seemed to realize that the guys really were making fun of her because she rubbed them the wrong way. She just loved the attention. She talked a lot too. Just to be saying something, I guess? She's a lawyer now, and when she got her first job she sent out an announcement that read
    "I just got my dream job! I'm the personal law clerk to the honorable Judge XXX, Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals, 7th District blah blah blah, blah blah blah..." It cracked me up - you'd think it was the coronation of Queen Elisabeth.

    The second one is also a lawyer, but I don't know her that well. She's very starry-eyed, with a big smile, and seems very alert and energetic. The first time I met her, she was griping about how much schoolwork she had to do. (If you have soooo much work to do, why are you voluntarily playing sports with your friends?) Other people's thoughts: the ISTp said he thought she was on crack because she wouldn't shut up. My INFp friend says 'She's a nice girl', but avoids sitting next to her at dinner because every time she tells a story she sounds like she's bragging about the wonderful things she's done on her dad's credit card. She comes off as having to be the center of attention. She can't just be in a group and casually enter the conversation. She has to announce something, no matter what's going on, and make sure she's heard. If you don't snap to fast enough, she'll say it til you do.

    Anyway, I was thinking they VIed similarly, but I'm not very experienced at it...

    http://www1.snapfish.com/thumbnailsh...00/t_=95114500

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    Expat's Avatar
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    As far as those description go, they sound more like ENFj than ESFj.
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

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    Are ENFjs kind of shockingly blunt when they're ticked off about something? Like they'll be super-positive one minute, and then you cross some line and they'll act like they hate you and say something rather overboard for the situation. Like a client of my firm who was effusive about our design and then one day she didn't like the proposed plan revision and she said out loud, in the meeting, she felt like "the design team had raped her." That was a conversation stopper. Was she just an exception? Haven't ever heard the first girl do that, and the second one I wouldn't know... Maybe the lady made such an impression on me that I ignored the other ones as possibilities 'cause she was so extreme...her school was definitely her own personality cult, but working for her, you never knew which personality you were going to get...a tongue-lashing for a misplaced blob of paint, or adoration because your sense of color was 'just fabulous.'

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    Blaze's Avatar
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    i agree with expat...the descriptions seem enfj. esfj's don't like to stand out in that way.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Yeah, after reading the wiki articles, I think I see the differences... Now I'm not sure that I know any at all, even the original one. I don't think she's ESFj after all. She has to send her kids to the 'right' private school, live in the 'right' neighborhood. Someone joked around the office when a plastic pitcher disappeared "So-and-so was here this weekend. Probably pitched it b/c it wasn't good enough." She has a high-powered job and appears very business-like and assertive, but I know she can get emotional in private about it. Unfortunately I hear only a marriage-jaded opinion of her, so I can't say any more than that...

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    implied's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tiny_dancer
    Yeah, after reading the wiki articles, I think I see the differences... Now I'm not sure that I know any at all, even the original one. I don't think she's ESFj after all. She has to send her kids to the 'right' private school, live in the 'right' neighborhood. Someone joked around the office when a plastic pitcher disappeared "So-and-so was here this weekend. Probably pitched it b/c it wasn't good enough." She has a high-powered job and appears very business-like and assertive, but I know she can get emotional in private about it. Unfortunately I hear only a marriage-jaded opinion of her, so I can't say any more than that...


    this is how i view a lot of dominants, honestly. i find it really odd how some wind up with super high powered jobs like this, just shows you that stereotypes of ENFjs all being artists or teachers or whatever is pretty much crap. their role gets overdone. fwiw i've had an INFp guy get super pissed at me throw some HARSH words.
    6w5 sx
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    sloan - rcuei

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    Your DNA is mine. Mediator Kam's Avatar
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    Agreed, these people sound like enfj's, especially the first one, and I know 4 enfj's.

    The esfp i know talks 75 mph per hour, is kinda annoying, but cares about people and doesn't really brag.
    D-SEI 9w1

    This is me and my dual being scientific together

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    Sounds ESFp/ENTj to me at least the second one anyway. Some ESFps are heavily into bragging as are some ENTjs but I feel this person is more likely an ESFp.
    Socionics: XNFx
    MBTI: INFJ

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    I know an ENFJ male.

    Description is spot on regardless of gender.

    Hey look at me all eyes on me.

    In a perfect world it would be all fists on him.

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    Quote Originally Posted by confused84
    I know an ENFJ male.

    Description is spot on regardless of gender.

    Hey look at me all eyes on me.

    In a perfect world it would be all fists on him.
    This made me laugh b/c my girls' piano teacher is ENFj and he OFTEN says "give me both your eyes" while teaching them. (which of course makes sense in the context but I thought of that when I read your post). I do think he needs attention and speaks loudly to make sure he's getting it.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    from toronto with love ScarlettLux's Avatar
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    Aw jeez. I'm a total attention-seeker and everyone knows it. =[ It's kinda sad though, looking from this objective standpoint about what people have written about how EIEs come across. It's all too true. Eh, I'm actually not that sad about it. Just sort of disconcerted - wow, this is how I really am. I definitely agree with the role thing! That is one reason why I shied away from IEI typing because it seems like I have much more of a role than role. I definitely see myself in a 'super high powered' job later on in life, actually plan to because I have a strong desire to show that yes, I can make a lot of money ... I agree that EIEs can be oppressive with their emotions, seeking to be heard and looked at from everywhere and everyone in their vicinity. I have an artist's heart within me, I'd like to believe, a writer's soul and all that mumbo-jumbo ... but when it comes down to it at the end of the day, I'd rather be a criminal lawyer that makes a lot of money (and might be a little less than moral) than a starving artist "true" to themselves ... it's a sad thing to admit though, folks.

    I can be seen as a braggart as well. I probably just AM a braggart ... though I see nothing wrong with taking pride in one's achievements, especially academic or professional achievement ... those I see as substantial and whatnot. Some things are just stupid and don't need to be talked about though.

    I'm probably not helping the EIE stereotypes ... I promise we're not as bad as this, just a little extremely focused on appearances and 'roles' - deep down, we're good-hearted people! My mission in life is to help others. I think we take it upon ourselves to have this "meaningful" ambition in life that can come across as egotistical since we can be very big-headed about the way we talk about our goals and stuff. But we don't really mean it in a negative way, we are just excited.


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