Help me out here. I give the impression in some situations, because I'm socially quiet, that people either need to encourage me to do things, or poke fun of me for not doing them. But honestly I don't want either of that. I simply want to be protected of something I don't really want to do, and something that I know won't bring me happiness. And no, sometimes I don't know this either and sometimes I should have listened when I didn't and sometimes you just don't really know until you try, but it's not really about that. It's about what makes me think highly of you and value you.

How can you logically get people to understand that you like to be protected? Are you just fucked if they're not one that likes to ahem protect?

Saying "I can do something" or "Don't be scared of it" when it's not fear as much as it is indifference and apathy. And if you just outright insult me or tell me to 'toughen up' I won't respect you either. But if you rescue me AWAY from what is bothering me, and shelter me with it, I will admire you so fucking much you won't even know.

But that's not being brave is it? Staying safe somewhere in a sanctuary, but it brings me so much happiness and a real, positive inner peace. Not some detached, lifeless Buddhism-esque peace (sorry but I think Buddhism sucks ass) but a real, upbeat kind of happiness. Upbeat about being naturally downbeat, I guess you could say.

So with that said, what type I am and who is my dual. I'm trying to be as honest as possible here.