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Thread: ENTjs acting like jerks - how can I get along with them?

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    Default ENTjs acting like jerks - how can I get along with them?

    this is a cry for help!!!
    im an 18 year old enfp who has been having problems dealing w/ some entj girls in my classes in college who always act like assholes
    im the kind of person that really likes to get along w/ everyone, but for some reason i cant seem to get past what feels like a "tough front" and it makes it hard for me to communicate,
    example: whenever i try to talk to this particular girl she makes some retarded comment and the way she says it makes it feel like she's talking down to me, and i dont know why this is since i have never done anything to her...
    just kinda wondering why this could be, if anyone has any suggestions about how to get an entj to not act like an asshole please help
    (note: this is not a lovey dovey situation, i have no interest in starting up a relationship, i just wish i could talk to her in class w/o getting pissed off )
    (note2: im not completely sure on the typing, just guessing based on my experiences w/ entj's)
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    Last edited by ENFPaaron; 01-28-2011 at 02:10 PM.

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    Creepy-

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    dfsfsd

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    I agree with steve ... I think those are isolated cases or maybe matters of perception. Otherwise, ENTjs are usually very likable. Atleast I have always gotten along with them.

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    Must be estj's... Anyway, ignore them or make yourself respected. It sounds like they're walking over you. Don't bow down to them, or they won't respect you. Don't be nice with them, and even if they are nice with you, continue being tough.
    ENTj - intuitive subtype - 8w9, sp/sx

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    well.... thats simple i guess, lol
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    Last edited by ENFPaaron; 01-28-2011 at 02:11 PM.

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    Creepy-Paul

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    Quote Originally Posted by ENFPaaron
    some entj girls
    Probability wise, they probably are not ENTJs. An ENTJ guy tends to be extremely rare. I think an ENTJ female is even rarer. I have never seen two ENTJs in the same place at the same time.

    Quote Originally Posted by Eidos
    Anyway, ignore them or make yourself respected. It sounds like they're walking over you. Don't bow down to them, or they won't respect you. Don't be nice with them, and even if they are nice with you, continue being tough.
    She is an ENFP. If the price were right, I would pay money to see an ENFP do as you advise. It would be a great show.

    Quote Originally Posted by ENFPaaron
    whenever i try to talk to this particular girl she makes some retarded comment and the way she says it makes it feel like she's talking down to me
    You aren’t going to kill over and die just because someone somewhere out there doesn’t like you for some reason or another. I would recommend ignoring them instead of trying to talk to them.

    Paul MBTI INTJ Socionics INTP

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    She is an ENFP. If the price were right, I would pay money to see an ENFP do as you advise. It would be a great show.
    All types have access to all functions. Of course an ENFP can do it, albeit not as comfortably as some other types.

    If you have better advice, give it.
    ENTj - intuitive subtype - 8w9, sp/sx

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    Quote Originally Posted by Paul
    She is an ENFP. If the price were right, I would pay money to see an ENFP do as you advise. It would be a great show.
    just for future reverence, im a guy, its all good tho no harm done

    i think ur right tho, would b pretty entertaining to try to watch me do that stuff, so if u guys want a show come to my french class
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    Last edited by ENFPaaron; 01-28-2011 at 02:11 PM.

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    Default Re: are entj's jerks? if so how can i get along w/ them?

    i could be totally wrong, i'm an intj - which is close to entj. they are talking down to you. they are typical bullies, pushing people that don't push back, yet still very bright.



    dealing with bullies for some time i find the best way is to get them at their own game. talk back to them, insult them if you have to. i've found that on some intrinsic level, they switch their roles. i remember one guy was always acting like mr tough guy, i forget the incident, but he pushed me, i pushed him back. and whatever happened after that we more or less became friends. not friends in a hang out sense, just less jerk like.

    but all in all, pretend you don't hear it. have a tough skin, and don't be afraid of insulting them back, it should hurt more than they are putting on.

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    This could be actually cace of into ENFps Role Function, which is also . I would say that those people are ESTps. ESTp has as weak function, so it may not know that it hurts others feelings. And acting by is common for them, after all, it is their strongest one. But acting by it activates the of ENFp and it gets hurt. Role Function doesn't like attacs, only Vulnerable Function hates it worse. See the description of Superego Relations on the main site and look, if it matches with the boss of the bullys.
    Semiotical process

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    Exclamation how to deal with it

    Quote Originally Posted by Paul View Post
    Probability wise, they probably are not ENTJs. An ENTJ guy tends to be extremely rare. I think an ENTJ female is even rarer. I have never seen two ENTJs in the same place at the same time.



    She is an ENFP. If the price were right, I would pay money to see an ENFP do as you advise. It would be a great show.



    You aren’t going to kill over and die just because someone somewhere out there doesn’t like you for some reason or another. I would recommend ignoring them instead of trying to talk to them.

    Paul MBTI INTJ Socionics INTP

    *Tch seriously if the kid did meet 2 girls that were entj's (highly unlikely), why is he so scared to confront them? If he really wants to have a conversation with them then just do it, who cares about the reason as to why the girl's manner or form when talking to him, if he thinks she is talking down to him and he doesn't do anything about it then piss off right, why bother when you can't even have a basis to confront her. All I'm saying is that i took the test not too long ago and out of many times i got this "ENTJ" label. Just forget about labels right now and if the kid really does want to approach her, he should have a good idea on how to do it because it seems that he interacts with them a lot since they are in the same class, so he should already know or have a good understanding as to what will most likely happen when they talk. From that just look at your situation and plan how to execute a strategy on how to confront them, and if he still thinks they are talking down to him and he can't figure out how to confront it, grow a pair and deal with it. I've just recently started to pick up on this personality factoring, mostly just skimmed through it, more than likely i will try to understand how the others' are but for this post just saying if the kid wants to talk to the girls knowing he is struggling, all i can say is stand your ground and don't give into that pressure crap, out-witt them is all it takes. p.s this is just how it is and people will never grasp it unless he understands the raw truth haha
    - Dave ENTJ

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    Default Respect will be given to those who demand it

    Quote Originally Posted by mike_INTJ View Post
    i could be totally wrong, i'm an intj - which is close to entj. they are talking down to you. they are typical bullies, pushing people that don't push back, yet still very bright.



    dealing with bullies for some time i find the best way is to get them at their own game. talk back to them, insult them if you have to. i've found that on some intrinsic level, they switch their roles. i remember one guy was always acting like mr tough guy, i forget the incident, but he pushed me, i pushed him back. and whatever happened after that we more or less became friends. not friends in a hang out sense, just less jerk like.

    but all in all, pretend you don't hear it. have a tough skin, and don't be afraid of insulting them back, it should hurt more than they are putting on.


    I have a lot of friends from I'm guessing with different personalities, I wasn't a bully but I have been known to be blunt at times and I guess I can see it in their faces when they don't typically agree to what I'm saying. Your statement I believe has some truth to it because I will probably not hang with people that don't make sense when talking and it irritates me to the core when the reply is highly irrelevant to what the main point is. But in some instances that I've had when people actually argue a good point and don't really give in to the whole words hurt crap I have a good amount of respect for that person whatever personality type he/she may be. As to your situation I'm sure your friend felt the same to respect you for not backing down.

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    Visualize them as monkeys in their own self-imposed cages; jerks usually have many issues that they are trying to hide. Would you feel upset if a monkey mocked you? You have no control over what others may say but you certainly have control over how messages are received.

    a.k.a. I/O

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    Depressed LIEs in particular can be quite quarrelsome, which usually happens when their spouse has left them. When in such states they might resort to things such as alcoholism and go around looking for others to blame for their problems. Best approach is to be very direct with them and let them know exactly what it is they are doing that is offending you, while at the same time remaining as sympathetic as possible. They are much softer internally then a Beta ST and will immediately feel regret.
    Last edited by Muddy; 12-12-2016 at 12:08 AM.

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