Hey

[TheBedlam]

So...

One thing about me is that I think my personality has changed greatly (and for the better) though the early college years, even looking back at the highschool years. I few years ago I was pretty much oblivious to everything. I didn't do well in school because doing well in school wasn't a concept that hit me yet. I was anxious most of the time. And I didn't even know or care about building relationships with people (oddly I had a decent group of friends but I don't remember how or why they were my friends). I remember almost nothing of what I did before highschool except the state of mind I was in at various times. I liked to create maps and architechtures for video games.

I don't know when it hit me but at some point I was just a lot more comfortable. I started to realize there were "important" things to do. Knowing why doing work was clear to me. And I was a lot more social. I still had axieties, but they didn't show anymore. When I got into doing things, I was confident, even though my mind would always worry about things. You could describe it as a duck on a pond; if you look at it, it looks very laid-back and comfortable, but underneath the water it's feet are going a mile a minute.

I enjoy going out and drinking a couple times a week, but at the same time, I could take a month or two off a year being completely seperate from the people I usually go out with, then see them again and be fine with picking up where I left off.

I tend to blend in with my enviorment as well. If the people around me are always drinking, I drink, if I'm alone I'll totally forget about it.

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

That's enough.

[astralsilky]

writing style vibes ~= FDG's type

[FDG]

writing style vibes ~= FDG's type

good observation, i agree.

Although life experiences are different.

I relate a lot to this though:

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

I'm not particularly anxious anyway, never have been except for specific instances.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

I realize that having a pessimistic view about others helps me in a roundabout way. I used to care a lot about what other people thought, but then I was all 'what the hell why am I doing this?' None of these people are ever gonna live my own life for me, and none of them really went out of their way to do jack shit for me. The only people that have done that is my best friend and my close family members. So why the hell am I so concerned about what other people think? It's just pointless. Until you show genuine care for me and my viewpoint, why should I give a fuck what you think of me? Are you paying my own bills, wiping my own ass, giving me some mind-blowing sex, or just spending time with me?

Show some concern for other people other than your own goddamn self and maybe you'll earn my respect. I hate selfish people regardless of type, hence my loathing for Ayn Rand's philosophy.

I used to have a very idealized view about human nature, but after seeing the same stereotype happen about 110 times in a row you just lose hope. *cry*

I'm glad I'm growing up though. When I was a teenager I was so self-conscious, and I thought about what other people thought of me like all teens do. Ewwww. I'm so glad I don't give a shit anymore really. Why force yourself to care when you'll just be disappointed? It's probably better to just be naturally jaded and nihlistic, and that way you can be surprised when an honestly good thing happens to you.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

Ezra?

Ayn Rand?

Pharderus?

haha. :wink:

[Kristiina]

I think pre-teen anxieties might be type-related because some types are just so chilled out all the time. It's difficult to imagine an ESTp excessively worrying about things.

I started to realize there were "important" things to do. Knowing why doing work was clear to me.

I'm trying to decide if this part is textbook case of Se-Ni. The thought that there is a bigger meaning behing things and you have to do what's necessary. ("hard work pays off in the end")
Or is it just Te? (you know... working and doing what's important)

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

Everybody has their problems, I think people suggesting that some types are always cool is creating neurosis in people because it just doesn't exist. People always go 'Wow you're so cool and laid-back and you don't let things bother you and you really know how to help others' but once they get to know me they go:

"Goddamnit you're as fucked up as the rest of us and I like it."

In a society that values extroversion, the ESTps and such are always gonna seem more valuable than other types, as well, remember the culture bias.

I love and all but as confident as ESTps can be it can't solve all of our problems, nope.

[TheBedlam]

No offense BulletsandDoves, but none of your posts really seem relevant.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

Did I say I was trying to be relevant?

[TheBedlam]

No, but it's assumed you should be.

[strrrng]

yes, it is; atleast halfway (tangents are fine, but correlation should be there).

anyway......

I'm glad I'm growing up though. When I was a teenager I was so self-conscious, and I thought about what other people thought of me like all teens do. Ewwww. I'm so glad I don't give a shit anymore really. Why force yourself to care when you'll just be disappointed? It's probably better to just be naturally jaded and nihlistic, and that way you can be surprised when an honestly good thing happens to you.

I relate. Well, I'm in my late teens, but the reason I stopped caring about what people thought was generally the same way you put it, and also I just realized cognitive perceptions are uncontrollable in others and what matters is staying true to yourself, not molding to someone else's expectation of you. When people laugh/make fun of you, they are just annoyed that you have acted in an unpredictable way or in a way that doesn't fit in with their (insular) perception. And I also relate to your pessimistic attitude. My mom hates it - she says "how can you be so young and so cynical"...I say "I've just observed a lot of things and seen below the surface to the stuff that really goes on"

I don't think it's better to be nihilistic in the sense that you'll be surprised if something good happens - that's just like being completely open and being surpised when you get stabbed in the back. But I think it's better to have an accurate view of humanity, which, in my opinion, is fairly nihilistic, just so you know what you are dealing with.

Oh yeah, and for the original post, you struck me as INTp. How you mentioned not needing people, lack of work ethic in younger years, the metaphor of the duck you used and how you described your "realization" - which seemed like an intuitive insight - about needing to do things in life.

[Gilly]

I relate a lot to this though:

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

Ditto.

[TheBedlam]

I relate a lot to this though:

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

Ditto.

Wouldn't that be Ti?

[TheBedlam]

the metaphor of the duck you used

I got that one from The Replacements.

[Kristiina]

I relate a lot to this though:

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

Ditto.

Wouldn't that be Ti?

I think it's Fe quadra preference (Ti just is just in the same quadra). You might be a serious person, but in company of friends you want to look good, look cool, have fun and look like you're having fun. Some would say that everyone thinks like that, but I've seen an ESTj who totally pouted at everyone else having fun, because she wanted to sleep. The rest of the group might have been sleepy, but it was worth staying up for the fun group event. Fe-quadra people will very rarely be party-poopers. The way I understand it, wanting to seem like something (or not wanting to seem pretentious) has an underlying idea that your image is important and this is opposite of the Fi idea that what matters most is what's in the person's heart.

[TheBedlam]

I relate a lot to this though:

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

Ditto.

Wouldn't that be Ti?

I think it's Fe quadra preference (Ti just is just in the same quadra). You might be a serious person, but in company of friends you want to look good, look cool, have fun and look like you're having fun. Some would say that everyone thinks like that, but I've seen an ESTj who totally pouted at everyone else having fun, because she wanted to sleep. The rest of the group might have been sleepy, but it was worth staying up for the fun group event. Fe-quadra people will very rarely be party-poopers. The way I understand it, wanting to seem like something (or not wanting to seem pretentious) has an underlying idea that your image is important and this is opposite of the Fi idea that what matters most is what's in the person's heart.

Could be, I guess the appearance thing could be described through Fe. But more of keeping the "serious side" to yourself, I think, would be more logically related to Ti.

[Kristiina]

I relate a lot to this though:

Also, for someone who generally doesn't care about what people think, I amazing care about my appearence. I don't think appearence is much a reflection of what's in your head, but I guess it's just an additional thing to worry about. I think of myself as intelligent, but I don't like to come off that way, or tell people. I don't what to seem pretentious or anything. I'd prefer just to look cool and have fun with people, but keep my serious side to myself.

Ditto.

Wouldn't that be Ti?

I think it's Fe quadra preference (Ti just is just in the same quadra). You might be a serious person, but in company of friends you want to look good, look cool, have fun and look like you're having fun. Some would say that everyone thinks like that, but I've seen an ESTj who totally pouted at everyone else having fun, because she wanted to sleep. The rest of the group might have been sleepy, but it was worth staying up for the fun group event. Fe-quadra people will very rarely be party-poopers. The way I understand it, wanting to seem like something (or not wanting to seem pretentious) has an underlying idea that your image is important and this is opposite of the Fi idea that what matters most is what's in the person's heart.

Could be, I guess the appearance thing could be described through Fe. But more of keeping the "serious side" to yourself, I think, would be more logically related to Ti.

mhh, I agree.

[TheBedlam]

You agree with me too much.

[XoX]

You might be a serious person, but in company of friends you want to look good, look cool, have fun and look like you're having fun. Some would say that everyone thinks like that, but I've seen an ESTj who totally pouted at everyone else having fun, because she wanted to sleep. The rest of the group might have been sleepy, but it was worth staying up for the fun group event. Fe-quadra people will very rarely be party-poopers. The way I understand it, wanting to seem like something (or not wanting to seem pretentious) has an underlying idea that your image is important and this is opposite of the Fi idea that what matters most is what's in the person's heart.

I have to tell that no matter how much people say I'm and no matter if I possibly have merry > serious preference I can't relate to this at all. So either this does not hold true for all Quadra types or I'm certainly not .

For example I understand that image is important to many people and thus in many environments you are forced to take that into account but when I'm with _friends_ I don't want to be concerned about my image. That is the whole point of friendship more or less. Whenever I have to be concerned about things like "looking good", "looking cool", "looking like having fun", "looking after my image" I am not with friends but with people I have to network with in order to get something done or to fulfill some responsibility (which is very different from a friendship to me). I also am a "party-pooper" in the sense that if I feel tired or if I don't feel like participating in a group activity I just don't. So when I'm in a good mood I am the last one awake and partying but when I'm in a bad mood I don't even participate. And I feel like I have a right to make that call. In addition the idea that image > what's in the person's heart seems like the opposite of me. Isn't image a fake thing by definition? How could that possibly be more important than what is real? It makes very little sense to me.

Posts like this really confuse me as I have slowly built a case for switching from Fi to Fe side (and most other people telling me the same thing) but then I read something like this from a dominant and absolutely and totally can't relate at ALL. So I guess I stay in the limbo for now

[FDG]

That is likely a preference for extraversion, XoX.

[XoX]

That is likely a preference for extraversion, XoX.

Just to make sure. Do you mean I show preference for extroversion but the vs preference is unclear? Or do you mean Kristiina's post shows preference for extroversion which is why I don't relate to it? Or?

[FDG]

That is likely a preference for extraversion, XoX.

Just to make sure. Do you mean I show preference for extroversion but the vs preference is unclear? Or do you mean Kristiina's post shows preference for extroversion which is why I don't relate to it? Or?

Sorry you're right, I was unclear. I mean that the stance me, ThePeddler, and Kristiina show to have in common signals our preference towards extroversion indipendently of our preference on the merry vs serious dichotomy. After all given that this dichotomy is coincident with the usual Fi Fe divide, and given that nothing that has been said here in this topic is also present in the merry/serious description, I see no reason why one should arbitrarly associate Fi or Fe with that kind of behaviour.

I didn't mean to refer to a preference of yours, just wanted to advise you that, in my opinion, that's not a telltale of Fi or Fe.

[XoX]

That is likely a preference for extraversion, XoX.

Just to make sure. Do you mean I show preference for extroversion but the vs preference is unclear? Or do you mean Kristiina's post shows preference for extroversion which is why I don't relate to it? Or?

Sorry you're right, I was unclear. I mean that the stance me, ThePeddler, and Kristiina show to have in common signals our preference towards extroversion indipendently of our preference on the merry vs serious dichotomy.

Well it makes sense to correlate extroversion with that. However you don't see it relating to both extroversion and merry (perhaps extroversion being more dominant correlation)? I could imagine that merry extroverts would be most like that and serious introverts the least.

[FDG]

I don't see why honestly unless the meaning of merry is taken too much at face value, which is not to be done since it's a translation from russian.
I could easily see ExFps reasoning in an analogous ways, for example, given their Ti PoLR and pertainance to to enneagram 7.

Ah I see the edit on extraversion being the more correlated factor. I don't know then, I guess it could be, I don't see anything wrong with that. I also see the possibility of it being merry and aristocratic if the reasoning is something like "I don't want to be perceived as being a part of the "nerds" social group". Still the point above in regard to ExFp is present.

This basically means I don't know what the conclusion is

[XoX]

I don't see why honestly unless the meaning of merry is taken too much at face value, which is not to be done since it's a translation from russian.
I could easily see ExFps reasoning in an analogous ways, for example, given their Ti PoLR and pertainance to to enneagram 7.

Ah I see the edit on extraversion being the more correlated factor. I don't know then, I guess it could be, I don't see anything wrong with that. I also see the possibility of it being merry and aristocratic if the reasoning is something like "I don't want to be perceived as being a part of the "nerds" social group". Still the point above in regard to ExFp is present.

This basically means I don't know what the conclusion is

Let's say the conclusion is that extroversion likely dominates but other factors are probably involved in some way. That's pretty generic but not useless as it would suggest I'm introvert

[TheBedlam]

That is likely a preference for extraversion, XoX.

Just to make sure. Do you mean I show preference for extroversion but the vs preference is unclear? Or do you mean Kristiina's post shows preference for extroversion which is why I don't relate to it? Or?

Sorry you're right, I was unclear. I mean that the stance me, ThePeddler, and Kristiina show to have in common signals our preference towards extroversion indipendently of our preference on the merry vs serious dichotomy. After all given that this dichotomy is coincident with the usual Fi Fe divide, and given that nothing that has been said here in this topic is also present in the merry/serious description, I see no reason why one should arbitrarly associate Fi or Fe with that kind of behaviour.

I didn't mean to refer to a preference of yours, just wanted to advise you that, in my opinion, that's not a telltale of Fi or Fe.

It's "TheBedlam", not "ThePeddler".

And I'm an Introvert.

[XoX]

That is likely a preference for extraversion, XoX.

Just to make sure. Do you mean I show preference for extroversion but the vs preference is unclear? Or do you mean Kristiina's post shows preference for extroversion which is why I don't relate to it? Or?

Sorry you're right, I was unclear. I mean that the stance me, ThePeddler, and Kristiina show to have in common signals our preference towards extroversion indipendently of our preference on the merry vs serious dichotomy. After all given that this dichotomy is coincident with the usual Fi Fe divide, and given that nothing that has been said here in this topic is also present in the merry/serious description, I see no reason why one should arbitrarly associate Fi or Fe with that kind of behaviour.

I didn't mean to refer to a preference of yours, just wanted to advise you that, in my opinion, that's not a telltale of Fi or Fe.

It's "TheBedlam", not "ThePeddler".

And I'm an Introvert.

jhfijh ... whatever you are messing up the conclusion

[aestrivex]

initially i thought ILI because i related almost perfectly to everything (especially the minute particularities; perhaps not a very good way of correlating anything).

on the other hand, IEI might be more consistent with everything that has been said and i do sort of understand why the writing style is Fe-ish although i don't think its at all conclusive.

those would be my guesses. let's try the expat-and-variations test:

answer some or all of the following:

• you retire a billionaire happily ever after. describe what you do in your retirement years.
• what are your hobbies and interests and why do you find them intriguing?
• how would you describe your relationships with other people?
• what are your academic fields of interest and why?
• what makes you yourself?
• tell us the story of your life.
• is this restaurant run properly?

[TheBedlam]

[*]you retire a billionaire happily ever after. describe what you do in your retirement years.

Buy a major league baseball team. Travel to lots of places in the world.

[*]what are your hobbies and interests and why do you find them intriguing?

I kept myself entertained by listening to music. I like to go out and drink a couple times a week. And I work out a couple times a week (probably more for health reasons though)

[*]how would you describe your relationships with other people?

shallow

[*]what are your academic fields of interest and why?

Math. It's useful.

[*]what makes you yourself?

I don't know.

[*]tell us the story of your life.

Bitch, I already did that in my first post.

[*]is this restaurant run properly?

What? Are you schizophrenic or something? That made no sense.

[aestrivex]

i was hoping for some more thorough responses. don't feel compelled to answer all of them; i merely find that the best way to determine somebody's type is to get them talking about themselves.


try taking one of the questions and writing a detailed response rather than a one line "yeah, i go swimming sometimes."


(ftr the restaurant question is an inside joke; ignore it)

[TheBedlam]

Writing detailed responses takes too much time. I did it for my original post. Why don't you ask question about something that was unclear in what I've already written.

[ScarlettLux]

Bitchy ILI ftw

[TheBedlam]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

[ScarlettLux]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

Based on your answers, yep

[TheBedlam]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

Based on your answers, yep

Yes, but why?

[ScarlettLux]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

Based on your answers, yep

Yes, but why?

You sound like an ILI.

[TheBedlam]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

Based on your answers, yep

Yes, but why?

You sound like an ILI.

Go reason.




But I'm pretty dissapointed to hear it. :/

[ScarlettLux]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

Based on your answers, yep

Yes, but why?

You sound like an ILI.

Go reason.




But I'm pretty dissapointed to hear it. :/

I'm just playing along with your short answers.

[TheBedlam]

Bitchy ILI ftw

Are you sure about that?

Based on your answers, yep

Yes, but why?

You sound like an ILI.

Go reason.




But I'm pretty dissapointed to hear it. :/

I'm just playing along with your short answers.

I'll admit, you just owned me.

[aestrivex]

Writing detailed responses takes too much time. I did it for my original post. Why don't you ask question about something that was unclear in what I've already written.

wtf you havent even said anything. what exactly am i supposed to dispute?