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Thread: Help pin down my type please

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    Default Help pin down my type please

    Hello everybody, new to this board (as if you didn't know) and to be honest new to the whole socionics and oldham typing, so far it's been all MBTI.

    I discovered this board a few days agao and have been lurking reading the threads, trying to get to grips with all this new information.

    MBTI types me as an INFP, and socionics also types me as an INFp.

    The only reason I am questioning this typing, is because certain parts of the INFP description don't match up, especially the behaviour of other INFP's which is not like mine.

    I was a member of an infp forum, and felt totally out of place, as I am not very warm, I do make judgements on other people, groups, ways of life, I am not affectionate (except inside), I am aggressive (think rock chick tattoos and moshing lol), I don't care if I hurt people (stopped caring about 3 yrs ago when it became apparant that caring only leads to hurt for me, and better them than me).

    I am not even sure if I can accept the introverted label for myself, as I think introversion was forced on me by others, in the Western world Extraversion is valued, in the Middle eastern world Introversion is valued for women.

    So, would it be possible for someone more experienced in this, help me pin down my type better.

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    Yeah, first things first - don't make the same mistake I did. I'm an SLE (ESTp) and I am NOTHING like the ESTP of MBTI (I'm an ENTJ). So if you're an INFP in MBTI, you might not necessarily be an INFp (or IEI) in socionics terms.

    The problem is in the way the functions are described in both theories - they are different. The Extraverted Thinking of MBTI is at odds with its socionics counterpart.

    Nonetheless, you may be an INFp. The best thing to do is start from scratch - give a description of yourself and post some pictures. People will then be able to help you to identify more with a type.

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    Hi Ezra, sorry for the delayed response.

    To be honest I am not comfortable putting a picture of myself up at this forum just yet, and I wasn't aware that looks could also help determining type.

    Lets see, I am a lover of sci-fi and fantasy literature, and see myself as a budding author (same genre). I can read other genres but they don't provide enough escapism for me. The only non fiction books I am interested in are about politics and religion, it fascinates me to spend hours pouring over religious texts, and history books, connecting dots and trying to understand better the desire of humanity for religion, or should I say need for it, I believe it was Voltaire who said "If god did not exist, it would be necessary to invent him", which to me sums up mankinds bizarre desire for one.

    The interest in politics is probably the only here and now interest I would say I have, and that only in so far as studying the effects religion has within politics. Don;t get me wrong, I am not religious, but I am as i said fascinated by it.

    I can accept the day dreaming part of the description, head in the clouds, looking spaced out, as that really does sound like me. I find the real world jarring, and find I have to force myself to do things. I think I do the bare minimum one can do to function in todays society, and spend alot of time alone.

    I am very unapproachable in RL, I shun new connections, and avoid any interaction that is not necessary. This is a complete turnabout for me as prior to 10yrs ago I was very sociable, and sought new and exciting connections readily. I couldn't stand being alone for too long, becoming bored quite easily. As I said above, I'm not sure if I am a true introvert, maybe social anxiety brought on by a traumatic events?

    I have some routines yet mostly live in an organised chaos, I know where everything is if I need it, it just doesn't looks as organised as it could do, and yes, I do self flagellate myself when it comes to that failing lol. I function better in order, I function better in routine, things get done if I force myself to create charts and plans, budgets and spreadsheets, yet being naturally chaotic I can only handle it for so long before falling back into disarray. Finding it tiring to some extent, I only do it because it works, and because I have responsibilities, remove them from the equation and I doubt I would do it at all.

    I am learning to play the piano, and doing my first year at Uni, English Literature, and religious studies, well I will be starting my first year in the upcoming term, prior to this I had limited options in life, due to cultural upbringing, and a very patriachal way of life, hence my lack of formal education.

    When it comes to feelings, I have them, I have them in buckets, however they are more in line with a self relfective form of emotion, I don't speak about deeper feelings. Whilst I was married one of the complaints in the first year by my husband (ex) was that I was cold, and didn't show enough love, yet I wasn't even aware it was an issue. To me it was enough that I was with him, my company = my feelings, the more time I dedicate the stronger what I feel is.

    I also have strong feelings for my family (love/hate). Everyone else is outside of that, and whilst I may really like a person, I don't actually have a deeper attachment to them.

    I am aggressive when outside, quick to anger by rudeness or what I view as "bad" behaviour, lack of manners etc. It's enough to make me want to fight, which in the last 5 gigs I went to, I did end up doing. I feel a need to bring bullies down a peg or two for some strange reason. This is again a new development to me, 10yrs ago I was all smiles and not aggressive, actually quite passive and it took alot to provoke me, now anything can provoke me.

    I love my music, can listen to music 24 hours a day if I could stay up that long, it helps with my creativity, especially classical which helps me to actually visualise the characters I am creating in my novel.

    I am not sure what more to add, if you need more, just ask specific questions, as it's quite hard to think of what is the more relevent parts of me to discuss.

    Hope that helps. Truthfully if it wasn;t for my agression levels and my extreme dislike of people, the fact that I don;t form deeper attachments and keep it all as shalow as possible, I would probably accept the type as it stands.

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    eh to me you sound like an infp who's still got some angst and maybe some issues to work with. there is that aristocratic side to infp's and they always are striving for being around the best of the best. maybe that fits?

    you could take a look at the Reinin dichotomies, esp temperaments, that's a good place to start. but you really don't sound like an infj at all. you could also consider intp?

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    (getting identical vibes a tiny bit. at any rate i relate with some of what has been said! not the organizational problems, really, although i work better in a somewhat structured environment as well.)
    6w5 sx
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    Hi BerberElla, I'm curious as to how well you relate to this description?

    People of this type frequently experience the sensation of discomfort with themselves and with their surroundings. They become irritated when they experience discomfort because it shames them. They do not understand why, for example, they can have a high tolerance for pain and discomfort in more extreme situations, yet in their day to day lives they are easily bothered by such trifles.

    They are not good at measuring and judging sensations. This is why it is helpful for them to have a partner who knows their tastes and habits better than they do, and who will remember which things have caused them discomfort in the past. Their ideal partner will also be farsighted enough to help them prevent burn out. They're not good at taking time out of their schedule for rest and leisure. They generally don't take the time to rest until they have to because they've worn themselves out. During these periods of down time, they usually watch TV or spend time online. Even then, they may be resting, but they are not relaxing. During these periods of "forced hibernation" they feel a strong sense of uneasiness and stress.

    It's important to understand that they dislike taking time away from accomplishing things, so if they're at the point where they are willing to actually take time out and rest, it's because they have to, and it's not a good idea to pressure them to do things or be more active. When they're resting, it greatly irritates them if they're asked to run errands or do chores. It may also be difficult to get or hold their attention when trying to communicate with them during their down time. They may even stop answering the phone. (However, under normal circumstances, they tend to do a few different things at the same time.)

    They don't usually worry about their physical needs and comfort when they're working or trying to get something accomplished. In their mind, it only slows them down. Similarly, they can get by without much at home, as they are very unpretentious and do not see a need to concern themselves with aesthetics and comfort. However, when they're in a caring relationship, they will anticipate that their partner is going to help them relax. In that situation, they will react strongly to even minor discomforts (they are not comfortable simply asking for help). To them, the ideal partner is someone who takes initiative and responsibility for things like dinner and household chores because they find it very stressful to deal with such matters, and having to worry about those things makes it even more difficult for them to relax (so they can in turn get more accomplished).

    People of this type are very unwillingly occupied with housework, and they don't usually notice the unattractive state of their surroundings. It's not until putting off chores creates enough disorganization to interfere with something that they're trying to accomplish that they are bothered by untidiness in their personal space. It is extremely rare for them to be stay-at-home spouses. Because women are often expected to be responsible for domestic duties, a female of this type often finds herself very irritated by a feeling of being torn between business/work and household responsibilities. She may try to get dinner ready and put away groceries while she's taking care of an important business call. If she finds herself having to spend time at home to care for her children during times when childcare is not available, it's likely that she'll try to get work done from home. When having children, she's likely to try to time it so that she gives birth and takes care of her infant during a slow time in her business, and she will still try to make use of the time she has off of work by teaching herself a foreign language or learning something that will help her in her profession.

    People of this type don't generally have much confidence in their own aesthetic taste and appearance. They aren't always successful in picking out attractive clothes for themselves. Women of this type don't often wear make up (and they usually look better without it). People of this type often consider themselves plain in appearance, even when such is not the case. The way they carry themselves may appear constrained, angular, tense, or awkward. They tend to doubt their ability to attract others, and may be self-conscious as a result. They feel awkward when attention is drawn to their appearance. Because people of this type tend to think they are less attractive than they actually are, it's not uncommon to see them in relationships or friendships with people who are not equally matched with them in terms of physical attractiveness or social status.

    While people of this type may feel reasonably comfortable wearing business attire when it's appropriate, they very much dislike being expected to dress up for and attend festive or ceremonial social occasions. They are uncomfortable being in situations which require them to take part in creating a warm or celebratory atmosphere for the sake of a holiday, event, or tradition. They prefer situations which aren't intended to be particularly warm and festive, but rather allow people to behave naturally and wear their everyday clothes.

    They frequently lack aesthetic sense in what they wear. They may wear something which is inappropriate for the occasion, impractical for what they're going to be doing (such as shoes that aren't water proof when they're going to be walking through wet grass), mismatches the style of something else that they're wearing, doesn't fit them properly, or is no longer in style or season. Knowing this, they feel uncomfortable wearing styles that are trendy and dislike taking "fashion risks", as they lack confidence in their sense of taste in such matters. In an attempt to avoid receiving attention or criticism, they often stick to simple and familiar styles of clothing that they feel comfortable in and that won't stand out. Their ideal partner does not comment on their deficiencies in appearance and clothing.

    Instead of offering criticism or asking if they want help with the weak areas described here, their ideal partner will take the initiative toward a implementing a solution. People of this type feel that this is the expression of a good relationship and will only entrust and properly relax around such a partner.
    SEE

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    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    eh to me you sound like an infp who's still got some angst and maybe some issues to work with. there is that aristocratic side to infp's and they always are striving for being around the best of the best. maybe that fits?

    you could take a look at the Reinin dichotomies, esp temperaments, that's a good place to start. but you really don't sound like an infj at all. you could also consider intp?
    I will look those up thanks.

    The profile for INTP doesn't fit me, plus my Ti is as weak as it could be, comes up as limited use in the cognitive functions test.

    Would an INFP have been as sociable as I was 10yrs ago? can type change through certain events?

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    Quote Originally Posted by BerberElla
    Would an INFP have been as sociable as I was 10yrs ago? can type change through certain events?
    I would think that an INFp actually gets more comfortable being sociable as they age. Don't see them going the other way.

    In my case, I'm more comfortable being social than I was back in college/high school, but still not entirely comfortable with it altogether. Group activity still intimidates me and unless I'm really passionate about an activity, I don't want to bother. I don't get the idea of socializing just to be social or the "fun" of it. I need to recharge after the effort of extraversion.
    socio: INFp - IEI
    ennea: 4w5 sp/sx

    **********

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    I dunno, but I doubt she's(?) INFp.

    Have you read the ENFp or perhaps INFj profiles?
    INTp
    sx/sp

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mea
    I dunno, but I doubt she's(?) INFp.

    Have you read the ENFp or perhaps INFj profiles?
    yeah, i do not see unless my conception of what is is completely and totally wrong. are INFps often described as inexpressive/cold etc? generally the ones here seem very open and bubbly.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    Hi BerberElla, I'm curious as to how well you relate to this description?

    People of this type frequently experience the sensation of discomfort with themselves and with their surroundings. They become irritated when they experience discomfort because it shames them. They do not understand why, for example, they can have a high tolerance for pain and discomfort in more extreme situations, yet in their day to day lives they are easily bothered by such trifles.
    They are not good at measuring and judging sensations. This is why it is helpful for them to have a partner who knows their tastes and habits better than they do, and who will remember which things have caused them discomfort in the past. Their ideal partner will also be farsighted enough to help them prevent burn out. They're not good at taking time out of their schedule for rest and leisure. They generally don't take the time to rest until they have to because they've worn themselves out. During these periods of down time, they usually watch TV or spend time online. Even then, they may be resting, but they are not relaxing. During these periods of "forced hibernation" they feel a strong sense of uneasiness and stress.

    It's important to understand that they dislike taking time away from accomplishing things, so if they're at the point where they are willing to actually take time out and rest, it's because they have to, and it's not a good idea to pressure them to do things or be more active. When they're resting, it greatly irritates them if they're asked to run errands or do chores. It may also be difficult to get or hold their attention when trying to communicate with them during their down time. They may even stop answering the phone. (However, under normal circumstances, they tend to do a few different things at the same time.)
    They don't usually worry about their physical needs and comfort when they're working or trying to get something accomplished. In their mind, it only slows them down. Similarly, they can get by without much at home, as they are very unpretentious and do not see a need to concern themselves with aesthetics and comfort. However, when they're in a caring relationship, they will anticipate that their partner is going to help them relax. In that situation, they will react strongly to even minor discomforts (they are not comfortable simply asking for help). To them, the ideal partner is someone who takes initiative and responsibility for things like dinner and household chores because they find it very stressful to deal with such matters, and having to worry about those things makes it even more difficult for them to relax (so they can in turn get more accomplished).
    People of this type are very unwillingly occupied with housework, and they don't usually notice the unattractive state of their surroundings. It's not until putting off chores creates enough disorganization to interfere with something that they're trying to accomplish that they are bothered by untidiness in their personal space. It is extremely rare for them to be stay-at-home spouses. Because women are often expected to be responsible for domestic duties, a female of this type often finds herself very irritated by a feeling of being torn between business/work and household responsibilities. She may try to get dinner ready and put away groceries while she's taking care of an important business call. If she finds herself having to spend time at home to care for her children during times when childcare is not available, it's likely that she'll try to get work done from home. When having children, she's likely to try to time it so that she gives birth and takes care of her infant during a slow time in her business, and she will still try to make use of the time she has off of work by teaching herself a foreign language or learning something that will help her in her profession.
    People of this type don't generally have much confidence in their own aesthetic taste and appearance. They aren't always successful in picking out attractive clothes for themselves. Women of this type don't often wear make up (and they usually look better without it). People of this type often consider themselves plain in appearance, even when such is not the case. The way they carry themselves may appear constrained, angular, tense, or awkward. They tend to doubt their ability to attract others, and may be self-conscious as a result. They feel awkward when attention is drawn to their appearance. Because people of this type tend to think they are less attractive than they actually are, it's not uncommon to see them in relationships or friendships with people who are not equally matched with them in terms of physical attractiveness or social status.

    While people of this type may feel reasonably comfortable wearing business attire when it's appropriate, they very much dislike being expected to dress up for and attend festive or ceremonial social occasions. They are uncomfortable being in situations which require them to take part in creating a warm or celebratory atmosphere for the sake of a holiday, event, or tradition. They prefer situations which aren't intended to be particularly warm and festive, but rather allow people to behave naturally and wear their everyday clothes.
    They frequently lack aesthetic sense in what they wear. They may wear something which is inappropriate for the occasion, impractical for what they're going to be doing (such as shoes that aren't water proof when they're going to be walking through wet grass), mismatches the style of something else that they're wearing, doesn't fit them properly, or is no longer in style or season. Knowing this, they feel uncomfortable wearing styles that are trendy and dislike taking "fashion risks", as they lack confidence in their sense of taste in such matters. In an attempt to avoid receiving attention or criticism, they often stick to simple and familiar styles of clothing that they feel comfortable in and that won't stand out. Their ideal partner does not comment on their deficiencies in appearance and clothing.

    Instead of offering criticism or asking if they want help with the weak areas described here, their ideal partner will take the initiative toward a implementing a solution. People of this type feel that this is the expression of a good relationship and will only entrust and properly relax around such a partner.
    The parts in bold I do identify with, being forced to look after kids at home, with no childcare or help has literaly driven me insane, and I likely would have been juggling career and kids, rather than be a stay at home mum had that option been available to me, however cultural/religious practises meant that was out of the question.

    I'm not sure how I feel about a partner who takes care of things, I may feel too controlled like that, yes it would be great if he was the one to do the chores, budgeting, and worry about real life issues, but telling me what to do wouldn't go down very well with me.

    I feel I identified with some, and not with others, pretty close though.

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    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune
    Quote Originally Posted by BerberElla
    Would an INFP have been as sociable as I was 10yrs ago? can type change through certain events?
    I would think that an INFp actually gets more comfortable being sociable as they age. Don't see them going the other way.

    In my case, I'm more comfortable being social than I was back in college/high school, but still not entirely comfortable with it altogether. Group activity still intimidates me and unless I'm really passionate about an activity, I don't want to bother. I don't get the idea of socializing just to be social or the "fun" of it. I need to recharge after the effort of extraversion.
    Yes, but the last ten years have been really intense, I have been through some really life changing events, that hurt me severely and my social anxiety stems from that, which is why I am not sure if I am a repressed extrovert?

    I would have seen myself as an extravert during my younger years.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mea
    I dunno, but I doubt she's(?) INFp.

    Have you read the ENFp or perhaps INFj profiles?
    I have read the profiles, and know a few enfp's and infj's, I could see some of me in the enfp, but the old me, the infj profile doesn't fit me at all the way I read it at MBTI. (I know I must let go of that, as this system is different, but I read the socionics infj and still didn;t identify that much.

    Isn't enfp extraverted feeling? most enfp's I know can not with hold affection to the extent I can, and lavish affection on those they love, I am restrained.

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    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    Quote Originally Posted by Mea
    I dunno, but I doubt she's(?) INFp.

    Have you read the ENFp or perhaps INFj profiles?
    yeah, i do not see unless my conception of what is is completely and totally wrong. are INFps often described as inexpressive/cold etc? generally the ones here seem very open and bubbly.
    I am inexpressive and cold in my outside relationships, I am bubbly and open in what I say, but not open to feelings.

    My online persona is different from my RL life one, as there is no need for anxiety. It depends who I am talking to online, or who I am debating as to wether I am cold and hurtful or wether I am open and friendly.

    None of my online attachments are personal, and when I get tired of talking I can just sign out, if that makes any sense?

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    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    eh to me you sound like an infp who's still got some angst and maybe some issues to work with.
    yea
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    She sounds like she might have Fi preference but I'm not sure. I think the changes you've been going through lately might make it a little harder for you to find your type.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
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    Yeah, much of the way she is now probably isn't indicative of her type. It's her response to stress and whatnot. I think she could be ENTj. Fi > Fe and intuitive most likely. I see evidence of a Si PoLR, and ENTj makes sense with her reaction to the lack of Fi.
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    Quote Originally Posted by BerberElla
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    eh to me you sound like an infp who's still got some angst and maybe some issues to work with. there is that aristocratic side to infp's and they always are striving for being around the best of the best. maybe that fits?

    you could take a look at the Reinin dichotomies, esp temperaments, that's a good place to start. but you really don't sound like an infj at all. you could also consider intp?
    I will look those up thanks.

    The profile for INTP doesn't fit me, plus my Ti is as weak as it could be, comes up as limited use in the cognitive functions test.

    Would an INFP have been as sociable as I was 10yrs ago? can type change through certain events?
    yes i do really think so. i've seen intj's for example come across as really outgoing when they are children then they change in adolescence and become much much more introverted.

    i think life events have a profound impact on how people express their personality as well.

    besides, i've seen very very socialable infp's. take a look at scarlettlux here. even online she comes across as very outgoing.

    the natural state of infp's though is solitude for reflection on their Ni perceptions. perhaps you are going through a phase like this for some reason.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Quote Originally Posted by dee
    my advice would be to rate yourself on these reinin dichotomies

    http://the16types.info/forums/viewto...ghlight=reinin

    (say you are 25% sure you are reasonable, etc.) and use this reinin calculator @

    http://translate.google.com/translat...language_tools

    where 'complacency'-'suggests' means carefree-foresight, 'malleability'-'insistence' means compliance-obstinacy and 'vesyolost'-'gravity' means merry-serious
    I think one has to read and understand what the reinin dichotomies actually mean before using it.
    Most of the names aren't good at telling what they dichotomies really mean.
    INTp
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    Heh. No. The descriptions are good.
    I just meant that she has a lot of reading to do. And understanding, and digesting.
    Because it took be awhile to really understand each dichotomy. Or maybe I'm just stupid. Ha.
    INTp
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    I really don't think that reading the descriptions of the dichotomies is a good way for anyone (ESPECIALLY someone who's new to Socionics) to go about finding their type.

    If you want to understand your type, learn about the IM Elements and Model A and try to pin down a quadra. Once you've got that, take a look at temperaments and what each type in the dual pairs in that quadra does for the other.
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    Perhaps that's true for some, but those descriptions would still be an unwise place to have a newcomer start out. The descriptions are long and not thoroughly translated, and it's difficult to figure out which you are for a lot of them, and there are too many to read.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    I really don't think that reading the descriptions of the dichotomies is a good way for anyone (ESPECIALLY someone who's new to Socionics) to go about finding their type.

    If you want to understand your type, learn about the IM Elements and Model A and try to pin down a quadra. Once you've got that, take a look at temperaments and what each type in the dual pairs in that quadra does for the other.
    Yes I agree with this.
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  23. #23
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    1.) In typing, they should be used as evidence of one type over another, if at all. You have to know something about your functions or quadra values in order to do this though. Otherwise you'll end up with results that are way off.

    2.) They're way too long and confusing. Most people who are new to Socionics would start reading the first one, see how much reading they'd have to do... and how much information they'd have to digest and attempt to apply... and they'd say "fuck this shit" and lose interest.
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