Results 1 to 33 of 33

Thread: Is anyone here actually dating their dual right now?

  1. #1
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Is anyone here actually dating their dual right now?

    I'm actually more interested in whether anyone is in a long term relationship or married to their dual....but wouldn't mind hearing about any dual relationships....
    Suomea

  2. #2
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'm with my dual. We've been together over a year and a half, and have been living together since March of 2006.

    Dual relationships make life a hell of a lot easier, and your dual understands you better than most people do. That exciting walking-on-air homey moon phase of the relationship doesn't last long, but after that it feels like you've been together for a really long time.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  3. #3
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    I'm with my dual. We've been together over a year and a half, and have been living together since March of 2006.

    Dual relationships make life a hell of a lot easier, and your dual understands you better than most people do. That exciting walking-on-air homey moon phase of the relationship doesn't last long, but after that it feels like you've been together for a really long time.
    Awesome...... that's ENTj-ISFj right?
    Suomea

  4. #4
    jessica129's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    10,122
    Mentioned
    68 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I will never meet an ENFP. They do not exist.

  5. #5
    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    TIM
    3w4 sx/so
    Posts
    24,757
    Mentioned
    91 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?

  6. #6
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    I hear ya on Illusionaries..... INFps are hot.
    Suomea

  7. #7
    aka Slacker Slacker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    North Korea
    TIM
    IEE
    Posts
    8,819
    Mentioned
    24 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'm married to my dual - nine years tomorrow (happy anniversary to me!)
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

  8. #8
    Creepy-bg

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom
    I'm married to my dual - nine years tomorrow (happy anniversary to me!)
    today is my parents anniversary...

  9. #9
    aka Slacker Slacker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    North Korea
    TIM
    IEE
    Posts
    8,819
    Mentioned
    24 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Bionicgoat
    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom
    I'm married to my dual - nine years tomorrow (happy anniversary to me!)
    today is my parents anniversary...
    Today is my parents' anniversary too! Wow! 40-something years. I'm not sure how long exactly for them.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

  10. #10
    Creepy-bg

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom
    Quote Originally Posted by Bionicgoat
    Quote Originally Posted by Slacker Mom
    I'm married to my dual - nine years tomorrow (happy anniversary to me!)
    today is my parents anniversary...
    Today is my parents' anniversary too! Wow! 40-something years. I'm not sure how long exactly for them.
    same for mine... my oldest brother is like 46 or 47 they must have been married like 47 or 48 years I think.

  11. #11
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Suomea
    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    I hear ya on Illusionaries..... INFps are hot.
    yes me too. the relationship with the infp is going strong at 9 months. not sure about the safe thing, could be. i don't know any isfp men who are single and hot and my age. huh.

    @joy: the honeymoon phase with my infp man kinda faded fast too. he's definitely not an isfp, way too much Ni for that. but i think this could be our age and the fact that we've both been burned.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  12. #12
    from toronto with love ScarlettLux's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Toronto, Ontario
    TIM
    Beta sx 3w4;7w8
    Posts
    3,401
    Mentioned
    18 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I don't think much of my "dual". Not a good experience with an SLE but then again, we were both pretty unhealthy & not at the same wavelength for the time we were dating.

    I prefer my illusionary, beneficiary (oddly enough) and mirror.


    Dress pretty, play dirty ღ
    Johari
    Nohari

  13. #13
    Let's fly now Gilly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    TIM
    3w4 sx/so
    Posts
    24,757
    Mentioned
    91 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Congrats, Nicky

  14. #14
    I'm back, assholes! Herzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    TIM
    SLE
    Posts
    5,098
    Mentioned
    44 Post(s)
    Tagged
    7 Thread(s)

    Default

    I was for a little bit, but he went away for the summer, so we decided to hold off until he's back home.
    , Se-sub
    8w8-3w8-7w8 sx/sx

  15. #15
    jessica129's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    10,122
    Mentioned
    68 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Herzy
    I was for a little bit, but he went away for the summer, so we decided to hold off until he's back home.
    I admire people who can do that.

  16. #16
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,635
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Only if you accept I'm an entj, yes, been going on since april; since we're both young i think it can be still considered honeymoon phase (5 months into). also dated another isfj for a year but she was very unhealthy, but still thinking about it, i was very calm during that period of my life. i've only dated isfjs and infps btw; with the infp (it lasted briefly because after declaring of having fallen in love with me, she changed her mind and went back to her "secure" x boyfriend) it was very good for hanging out toghether - we had a lot of fun - but she was always very late for dates and that made me go batty. with the isfj's depends on how much we have in common, i have more in common with this last one that with the previous one so of course we get along much better; generally it's good overall especially when we are toghether a lot (usually the more time we spend toghether, the better it gets), the only "problem" is generally that they're duty-bound and I'm freedom-orientated - i can see how each other benefits of the other's influence (me becoming mroe duty-bound, them becoming more freedom-orientated), but it is generally a source of friction. very easy instead to get things done toghether. though with infps it's just as easy to get things done toghether. i don't know. it seems like i behave exactly the same around isfjs and infps, and i get exactly the same (good) results. but infps are very hard to keep and change their minds easily which makes me go insane.

    also the "feeling you've been toghether for a long time". i've had it both with isfjs and infps. hell i remember i was on the beach with this infp i had been dating for a week. we were talking with a guy we just had gotten to know. he said "i think you've been friends since childhood right?" during the conversation, i don't remember precisely the context. but it's been the same thing with this other isfj, and the comment has been made by her mother.

    i also know an INTp-ESFp couple i have personally helped setting up when they were undecided....
    i see many ESTp-INFp around
    i've seen forming lately an ENFj-ISTj pair
    i know another INTp-ESFp couple which has been toghether for 2 years
    3 ENTj-ISFj couples, one of which though is in an uncertain moment
    2 ISTp-ENFp, one of which is push-pull though
    i see a shitload of INTj-ESFj at the public library

    I think dual couples are pretty common honestly
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  17. #17
    Expat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Posts
    10,853
    Mentioned
    27 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I've been in a dual relationship in the past, and in hindsight some old "might-have-beens" were duals.

    My ENTp brother has been married to an ISFp for 20 years.

    An INFj good friend of mine has been married to an ESTj woman for about 7 years. I know slightly another likely INFj-ESTj couple.

    Of direct personal observation, I think that's it.
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

  18. #18
    aka Slacker Slacker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    North Korea
    TIM
    IEE
    Posts
    8,819
    Mentioned
    24 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I have a lot of neighbor duals: ISFp/ENTp, ISFj/ENTj, ESTj/INFp - hmm well those are the only ones I've really noticed.

    Then I have an aunt and uncle who are duals - ISTp/ENFp - and another who are INTj/ESFj
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
    -Mark Twain


    You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep.

  19. #19
    Expat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Posts
    10,853
    Mentioned
    27 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I forgot -- the parents of an INFj mate of mine are a very clear m ENTj - f ISFj couple.
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

  20. #20
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    @joy: the honeymoon phase with my infp man kinda faded fast too. he's definitely not an isfp, way too much Ni for that. but i think this could be our age and the fact that we've both been burned.
    I'd think it would be the other way around... if you've been burned you're less likely to leave the exciting/fun stage and enter the "safe" stage of the relationship.

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Only if you accept I'm an entj, yes, been going on since april
    ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  21. #21
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,635
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    @joy: the honeymoon phase with my infp man kinda faded fast too. he's definitely not an isfp, way too much Ni for that. but i think this could be our age and the fact that we've both been burned.
    I'd think it would be the other way around... if you've been burned you're less likely to leave the exciting/fun stage and enter the "safe" stage of the relationship.
    Why can't it be exciting and also safe
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  22. #22
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Well, it should always be a little of both, but one more so than the other depending on the stage of the relationship.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  23. #23
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,635
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    Well, it should always be a little of both, but one more so than the other depending on the stage of the relationship.
    But if you do exciting things with your dual, the relationship's exciting no matter what, right?
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  24. #24
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Life may be more exciting if you do exciting things together, but I wouldn't say it makes the relationship itself more exciting.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  25. #25
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    @joy: the honeymoon phase with my infp man kinda faded fast too. he's definitely not an isfp, way too much Ni for that. but i think this could be our age and the fact that we've both been burned.
    I'd think it would be the other way around... if you've been burned you're less likely to leave the exciting/fun stage and enter the "safe" stage of the relationship.
    nope.

    the fact that you've been burned translates into being really careful and dealing with issues as they come up head-on. you absolutely don't want to mess up again. this can turn into uncertainty about the relationship. the uncertainty alternates and cycles between us. but we both say there's more than enough there to keep going.

    and yeah fdg...it's exciting and kind of safe too. it's more like we have to deal with issues and the debitage from getting divorced, so it's not really honeymoon in that sense. but it is exciting when you get through things and come out feeling even more together, despite the "issues".

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  26. #26
    aka-kitsune's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    966
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    With you on the Semi-Dual. Tricky to tell whether I'm making progress, though.

    I've found that I probably prefer the more prominent "feeling" energy in ESFp than ESTp. It's warming, more open. ESTps can be downright cold and indifferent. Especially when they use your weak points to hurt you...

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    but infps are very hard to keep and change their minds easily which makes me go insane.
    I don't relate to that too much -- perhaps you're dealing with young INFps? Of course, I have trouble *making* up my mind in the first place. I can never really seem to decide what I really want from any situation.
    socio: INFp - IEI
    ennea: 4w5 sp/sx

    **********

    Quote Originally Posted by Mark Twain
    Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we'.

  27. #27
    Expat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Posts
    10,853
    Mentioned
    27 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    Not sure about Illusionaries, but I have a theory about Semi-Duals. They are more attractive to spend time with, in the "having fun" way, because of what I mentioned on the 8th function being your "fun" function. Semi-duals "feed" your dual-seeking function while being very active on what you see as a source of amusement, while your HA - the creative function of your dual - is a more "serious" business.

    So semi-duals are "duals for having fun times with". So especially if your relationships emerge from the people you start having fun with, it makes sense that you'd prefer the semi-dual. The problems appear when you actually have to be more "serious" together.
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

  28. #28
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    Not sure about Illusionaries, but I have a theory about Semi-Duals. They are more attractive to spend time with, in the "having fun" way, because of what I mentioned on the 8th function being your "fun" function. Semi-duals "feed" your dual-seeking function while being very active on what you see as a source of amusement, while your HA - the creative function of your dual - is a more "serious" business.

    So semi-duals are "duals for having fun times with". So especially if your relationships emerge from the people you start having fun with, it makes sense that you'd prefer the semi-dual. The problems appear when you actually have to be more "serious" together.
    I joke around more and in a different way with my INFj sister than I do ISFjs. It's more of a light hearted fun sorta thing. I'm not sure how to better explain it, but I see what you're saying.
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  29. #29
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,635
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by aka-kitsune
    I don't relate to that too much -- perhaps you're dealing with young INFps? Of course, I have trouble *making* up my mind in the first place. I can never really seem to decide what I really want from any situation.
    IDK, how young is 21? Because i see it as enough for dating that lasts at least some months

    I had pursued this INFp girl very openly without any hesitation and insisted when she was uh-oh, uh-oh, but she was way too whismical. I can totally stand competition with other guys in the first stages of a relationship, but c'mon, telling me that you're in love with me and then changing your mind - eh!
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  30. #30
    xyz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    7,709
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Yeah, getting into petty games with whomever you're pursuing is fucking stupid.

  31. #31
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    Not sure about Illusionaries, but I have a theory about Semi-Duals. They are more attractive to spend time with, in the "having fun" way, because of what I mentioned on the 8th function being your "fun" function. Semi-duals "feed" your dual-seeking function while being very active on what you see as a source of amusement, while your HA - the creative function of your dual - is a more "serious" business.

    So semi-duals are "duals for having fun times with". So especially if your relationships emerge from the people you start having fun with, it makes sense that you'd prefer the semi-dual. The problems appear when you actually have to be more "serious" together.
    c'mon expat don't you have a theory for us about illusionaries? enquiring minds want to know!!

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  32. #32
    jessica129's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    10,122
    Mentioned
    68 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    I'm an INFP magnet for some reason. The games i've had to deal with with those 'types' are unbelievable. Not worth the time or the effort.

  33. #33
    Suomea's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    TIM
    ILE-Ti
    Posts
    1,054
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Quote Originally Posted by Gilly
    For some reason, I'm more interested in both my Illusionaries and Semi-Duals than my actual duals. SEIs always seem too...safe?
    Not sure about Illusionaries, but I have a theory about Semi-Duals. They are more attractive to spend time with, in the "having fun" way, because of what I mentioned on the 8th function being your "fun" function. Semi-duals "feed" your dual-seeking function while being very active on what you see as a source of amusement, while your HA - the creative function of your dual - is a more "serious" business.

    So semi-duals are "duals for having fun times with". So especially if your relationships emerge from the people you start having fun with, it makes sense that you'd prefer the semi-dual. The problems appear when you actually have to be more "serious" together.
    c'mon expat don't you have a theory for us about illusionaries? enquiring minds want to know!!
    Illusionaries are the best sexual relation for creative subtypes in my opinion.
    Suomea

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •