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Thread: Why are extroverts so afraid of themselves?

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    Default Why are extroverts so afraid of themselves?

    Well?
    Binary or dichotomous systems, although regulated by a principle, are among the most artificial arrangements that have ever been invented. -- William Swainson, A Treatise on the Geography and Classification of Animals (1835)

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    becuase if we're not then other people are
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    Why are introverts so afraid of others?

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    Look Coney, personally I believe we are less in touch with parts of ourselves than introverts, and this leads us to have sudden scary thoughts flash into consciousness out of nowhere. This causes us to question our identitiy. Or maybe it's just me. I tend to believe most extroverts are unaware of this happening.

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    I think I'm the other way. I think my subconscious floods my conscious thoughts. I can't hear myself think over... well... myself thinking!
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    or maybe I just think too much

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    Quote Originally Posted by Joy
    I think I'm the other way. I think my subconscious floods my conscious thoughts. I can't hear myself think over... well... myself thinking!
    That's not the other way. That's what I described.

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    dfs

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    I think that Jung himself mentioned that extroverts don't understand so well them self than the introverts and one of the coals of being extroverted, is becomeing to understand your introverted part. And introverts must learn how to live your life with other people around.They cannot escape away from the problems into their fantasies or intellectual world.
    Semiotical process

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    Because you are never 100% sure of what you will do.
    Entp
    ILE

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    Quote Originally Posted by Steve
    I'm not afraid of myself
    That's cuz you're ENTJ AY.
    Entp
    ILE

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    Because if we are not, some one else might be ...

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    Quote Originally Posted by male21
    I think that Jung himself mentioned that extroverts don't understand so well them self than the introverts and one of the coals of being extroverted, is becomeing to understand your introverted part. And introverts must learn how to live your life with other people around.They cannot escape away from the problems into their fantasies or intellectual world.
    That was my understanding of it, also. Both introverts and extroverts have issues they must learn to sort out - the extroverts with their internal selves, the introverts with the world around them. Of course, Jung also did mention that introverts have a harder time with life.

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    I think Im more bored with myself than afraid. When I am alone and unstimulated for a long time I feel this pain inside, like and emptiness that I need to fill. I dont like that empty feeling so I guess I can be afraid of being alone for too long and having to experience it. There are times when I love to be alone with my thoughts. The best is when Im with a compatible introvert. Then I can be alone and with someone at the same time

    Topaz

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    Cone, have you started on the crack pipe? What are they doing to you in that college? Really, what compelled you to ask a question like that?
    MAYBE I'LL BREAK DOWN!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Rocky's posts are as enjoyable as having wisdom teeth removed.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz
    The best is when Im with a compatible introvert. Then I can be alone and with someone at the same time
    OMG that's the perfect way to describe my relationship. Not that there isn't a connection, but when we hang out it's often more like we're just simply in the same room. It usually comfy though, the only excpetion being if I'm feeling restless that day.
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    I think it may be something like this: The Extraverts are afraid they may be capable of doing what they see others doing, while the Introverts see what they are capable of doing and are afraid others might be doing it.
    Beware! Nerd genes on the prowl.

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    Er, my original question stemmed from an impression of extraverts that they are constantly worrying about coming off as self-centered or egotistical. Thus, they seem to think that by immersing themselves among people, they are helping others out and not themselves, because helping only yourself is very selfish. That's the impression I'm getting.

    As for "why are introverts so afraid of people", it comes from a lack of experience with people to realize that most of them aren't trying to destroy our self-esteem. :wink:
    Binary or dichotomous systems, although regulated by a principle, are among the most artificial arrangements that have ever been invented. -- William Swainson, A Treatise on the Geography and Classification of Animals (1835)

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    I think it's because of:

    1) Sometimes we are in our heads, so you aren't actually interacting with people when you do that.

    2) Not being able to compare yourself to other people as well as an extravert does, leading you to think that you are less of a person than you really are.
    MAYBE I'LL BREAK DOWN!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Rocky's posts are as enjoyable as having wisdom teeth removed.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Darklord
    I think it may be something like this: The Extraverts are afraid they may be capable of doing what they see others doing, while the Introverts see what they are capable of doing and are afraid others might be doing it.
    That sounds really cool and makes no sense what-so-ever.

    Topaz

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    I think it's because of:

    1) Sometimes we are in our heads, so you aren't actually interacting with people when you do that.

    2) Not being able to compare yourself to other people as well as an extravert does, leading you to think that you are less of a person than you really are.
    Hmm intuitives live inside their heads quite a bit. Moreso for the introverted ones but even the extroverted ones can miss social cues and appear eccentric.
    Comparing yourself with others can be a terrible trap that many extroverts fall into. It can help socialize you and it can also drive you into insanity when you dont live up to what others around you are doing or expect of you. I just strive to do my best and be happy with that.

    Topaz

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    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz
    Quote Originally Posted by Darklord
    I think it may be something like this: The Extraverts are afraid they may be capable of doing what they see others doing, while the Introverts see what they are capable of doing and are afraid others might be doing it.
    That sounds really cool and makes no sense what-so-ever.
    Who cares if it makes sense, I just want to be quoted .
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    Quote Originally Posted by Topaz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    I think it's because of:

    1) Sometimes we are in our heads, so you aren't actually interacting with people when you do that.

    2) Not being able to compare yourself to other people as well as an extravert does, leading you to think that you are less of a person than you really are.
    Hmm intuitives live inside their heads quite a bit. Moreso for the introverted ones but even the extroverted ones can miss social cues and appear eccentric.
    Comparing yourself with others can be a terrible trap that many extroverts fall into. It can help socialize you and it can also drive you into insanity when you dont live up to what others around you are doing or expect of you. I just strive to do my best and be happy with that.

    Topaz
    What's it like to be an extraverted intuitive type? I was under the impression that they are more absent-minded and wandering than "living inside their head". I find the line between introversion/intuition interesting because they can sound similar sometimes.
    MAYBE I'LL BREAK DOWN!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by vague
    Rocky's posts are as enjoyable as having wisdom teeth removed.

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    fdsbfhdsamf

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    Quote Originally Posted by Baby
    Quote Originally Posted by male21
    I think that Jung himself mentioned that extroverts don't understand so well them self than the introverts and one of the coals of being extroverted, is becomeing to understand your introverted part. And introverts must learn how to live your life with other people around.They cannot escape away from the problems into their fantasies or intellectual world.
    That was my understanding of it, also. Both introverts and extroverts have issues they must learn to sort out - the extroverts with their internal selves, the introverts with the world around them. Of course, Jung also did mention that introverts have a harder time with life.
    Yes, but this is the standard answer to the problem. It doesn't really tell you much. What I want to know are the intricacies of the problem.
    Binary or dichotomous systems, although regulated by a principle, are among the most artificial arrangements that have ever been invented. -- William Swainson, A Treatise on the Geography and Classification of Animals (1835)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rocky
    What's it like to be an extraverted intuitive type? I was under the impression that they are more absent-minded and wandering than "living inside their head". I find the line between introversion/intuition interesting because they can sound similar sometimes.
    For me, I have a constant dialogue going on in my head. Im constantly observing, comparing, adjusting, tweeking ideas, statements, pictures, music. Its hard to describe. I can have a conversation with you. Then in my mind I have that conversation over (or just certain key parts of it ) and I imagine I say something different. I may play out the senario a hundred times with different outcomes. I imagine you said something else or maybe you told me how you really felt, without the restraint of fear. I might imagine that we go somewhere or that I enter a room and everyone on this forum is there and I break out into song and we all start swaying to the rythm of some band that no one actually sees but the effect is so profound it washes over all of us and our hearts just burst with excitement.
    The scenery is constantly changing in association with whats going on outside and inside. I dont recommend being and IEE if you cant stand a lot of ambiguity and confusion. There is a constant free flowing montage of images and sounds that you have to get used to. There are other states of conciousness too but I dont want to confuse you (eh any more than I might have already :wink
    OOH before I end this I just remebered a time when I was hanging out with my SEE friend. He was waxing on and on about his Bose speakers which he said picked up the high end sounds decernable by only certain animals or something stupid like that (Yawn) When he asked me what I thought I said "I love this song." (the one that was playing) "It makes me think of being a fiery pheonix rising from the ashes and now poised for world domination (or something nutty like that)" I might as well explain that I never say things like that in a normal matter-of-fact way. I change my voice into the half bird half human pheonix, not too different from a parrot on crack. Arms outspread, head back, completely theatrical, which would amaze and crack the SEE up.
    Anyway so he goes on about how music affects me so different than him. The sounds were just sounds to him but for me it was a launch pad for some fanciful journey. I thougth that was a cool observation.
    OK disclaimer, I DO know the difference between reality and fantasy but extravesion with intuition for me means I can mix them like Calvin of Calvin and Hobbs.
    oh and one more thing. I almost always have some song playing in my head. I dont know why.

    Topaz

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    I'm like that too. Reading this made me realize why I need to interact with people and/or get out and do things. It helps me focus. If I'm alone for too long or if life gets boring and staid, I dissolve into a fog. I feel less real, even. In other words: "How can I know my opinion before I've told it to my friend?"
    If you've read Mrs Dalloway, it's a bit like that - this feeling of dissolving, becoming vague, and then focussing and making oneself real because one has to interact with people, make decisions, do things. Only Mrs Dalloway dislikes it, and I like it.
    I hope that makes sense.

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    I almost always have some song playing in my head. I dont know why.[/i]
    I do that too. Saves money (no iPod needed).

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    I often hold conversations with characters in my head. I've explained the entire development of the airplane to the Wright brothers several times, not to mention told Frodo about computers and skyscrapers and Anakin Skywalker about what will happen if he leaves that room in the Jedi Temple after having warned Mace Windu about Darth Sidious.

    I also have music playing in my head. Usually newly heard music, in some instances music I heard ages ago, and, in one memorable case, a tune I didn't hear until the day after.
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    Quote Originally Posted by schrödinger's cat
    I'm like that too. Reading this made me realize why I need to interact with people and/or get out and do things. It helps me focus. If I'm alone for too long or if life gets boring and staid, I dissolve into a fog. I feel less real, even. In other words: "How can I know my opinion before I've told it to my friend?"
    If you've read Mrs Dalloway, it's a bit like that - this feeling of dissolving, becoming vague, and then focussing and making oneself real because one has to interact with people, make decisions, do things. Only Mrs Dalloway dislikes it, and I like it.
    I hope that makes sense.
    Gasp yes, that makes total sense. Sometimes someone will ask my opinion on something and I will tell them in such a way that they say "Wow, you must have given that a lot of thought" and I'll say " Huh? No I never thought about it before in my life. I didnt even know that was in me" And here I had just delivered a speach with conviction and illlustrations, mental diagrams and examples. I dont even know where it came from.
    Sometimes I'll say something outloud to someone and then after I do I see how stupid it was. I would have never known how stupid the thought was unless I said it to someone. Then I could look at it objectively and change it. I like to have a friend who can act as a sounding board and also sensible people who understand and can give me their ideas on things. I like it when I make some philisophical statement about something and then realize "Hey thats good! It makes sense"
    I never read Ms. Dalloway, but I did see the movie The Hours *shudder*. I feel I paid my respects :wink:

    Topaz

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    The Hours isn't a bit like Mrs Dalloway. The book is about thought processes - not about linear, sequential thought, but about how people see the world, about what it feels like to be them. The plot is simple: Mrs Dalloway prepares a dinner party; the dinner party is described. End of story. But you get to see a whole world. You get to see inside people's heads. It's very well done, IMO.

    Another thing ENFPs think regularly: "Whoops, NOW I realize why they reacted so strangely..."

    Let me explain that.
    On a language course I got chatting with two people, and somehow we began to talk about the fact that in our country you've got to have had Latin at school to be able to study languages. I was totally against it. They reacted strangely. Things got rather chilly. I was genuinely surprised. Later I remembered that both those people are teachers of (taDAH!) Latin.
    Or: once I greeted a distant cousin of mine by banging a hymn book over his head. He didn't appreciate it, and I wondered why. Later I realized that it's because he's so dignified and tense. (However, my aunt and Mum both agreed that a little bang over the head probably did him a world of good.)
    Anyone else?

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    Cone, please explain it for me more deeply, what you meant with your question.

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    Quote Originally Posted by schrödinger's cat
    The Hours isn't a bit like Mrs Dalloway. The book is about thought processes - not about linear, sequential thought, but about how people see the world, about what it feels like to be them. The plot is simple: Mrs Dalloway prepares a dinner party; the dinner party is described. End of story. But you get to see a whole world. You get to see inside people's heads. It's very well done, IMO.

    Another thing ENFPs think regularly: "Whoops, NOW I realize why they reacted so strangely..."

    Let me explain that.
    On a language course I got chatting with two people, and somehow we began to talk about the fact that in our country you've got to have had Latin at school to be able to study languages. I was totally against it. They reacted strangely. Things got rather chilly. I was genuinely surprised. Later I remembered that both those people are teachers of (taDAH!) Latin.
    Or: once I greeted a distant cousin of mine by banging a hymn book over his head. He didn't appreciate it, and I wondered why. Later I realized that it's because he's so dignified and tense. (However, my aunt and Mum both agreed that a little bang over the head probably did him a world of good.)
    Anyone else?
    you are so funny. I'd love to respond to this but I think we've huh, highjacked this thread. We need to take it over to Delta

    Topaz

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    Sorry, you're right. I'll get back on track again.

    I recalled an interesting theory that might perhaps be helpful here. It's on http://www.benziger.org/content/view/8/27/ . Other thoughts on extraversion/introversion can be found on http://greenlightwiki.com/lenore-exegesis/Extraverted . What the Benziger article says is mainly that introverts' brains are wired in a way that makes them really sensitive to stimulation of all kinds. If an introvert's brain gets too much stimulation, he needs to minimize the amount of stimulation he gets. That's why he searches out "filtered environments" (that is Lenore Thompson's term). Those can be a small group of close friends; solitude; a particular area of interest; even a stage. Familiar situations are less stimulating than new ones, because experiences just repeat themselves and fall into familiar patterns.

    It's a bit more objective than saying that introverts "live inside their heads", or rather, it helps to explain what is meant by that.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Darklord
    I often hold conversations with characters in my head. I've explained the entire development of the airplane to the Wright brothers several times, not to mention told Frodo about computers and skyscrapers and Anakin Skywalker about what will happen if he leaves that room in the Jedi Temple after having warned Mace Windu about Darth Sidious.

    I also have music playing in my head. Usually newly heard music, in some instances music I heard ages ago, and, in one memorable case, a tune I didn't hear until the day after.
    @Darklord, what the hell is happening to you. Are you still here?

    @self, why am I constantly mystified but amused by Darklord?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Megan.
    @Darklord, what the hell is happening to you. Are you still here?
    That depends on your definition of "here" :wink: .
    Seriously, could you please rephrase that question? I don't know what you're aiming for.
    Quote Originally Posted by Megan.
    @self, why am I constantly mystified but amused by Darklord?
    Well, since the person you asked doesn't seem to want to reply, I'll take a shot at it:
    Maybe I'm clinically insane? If so, that would explain it all very easily and efficiently. I wouldn't worry, though. If this is insanity, don't ever cure me .
    Otherwise... I don't know. I just write down whatever comes into my head.
    Even if it sounds strange.

    There is no mystery so profound
    As unknown weirdo's head.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Darklord
    That depends on your definition of "here" :wink: .
    Seriously, could you please rephrase that question? I don't know what you're aiming for.
    I was successful then in getting you to experience a bit of what I experience when reading your posts. Yes, Darklord its true I often wish you would rephrase so that I would get your meanings. I prefer to think of your writings not as insane, what on earth would it say that I find the writings of a mad man entertaining/interesting when I occasionally figure it out, I prefer to think of them as organic (lost again? no ill intent intended this time :wink: ).

    It is almost like we are having some kind of quasi-identical thing.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Megan.
    It is almost like we are having some kind of quasi-identical thing.
    darklord is in a quasi identical relationship with practically everyone-even himself.

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