Results 1 to 25 of 25

Thread: Fi or Fe

  1. #1
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default Fi or Fe

    I know we have had this talk before, but,

    how can you tell which you value more? Or link to some old threads, etc.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  2. #2
    Expat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Posts
    10,853
    Mentioned
    27 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    , LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
    Quote Originally Posted by implied
    gah you're like the shittiest ENTj ever!

  3. #3
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Nothing makes me very very sad. If it did, all I would have to do is go back to my values and beliefs, which I have forged from the only thing(s) that seem capable of lasting.

    Also, no matter what possibly happened, I understand it could always be worse or better. And on the same note, there is always something more to be doing, rather than just relishing in your depression. Generally speaking, whatever happens, I just have to look at what the next objective is, what we are doing tomorrow, etc. I do not like lingering in moments, especially if it is a negative one.


    I do not really do anything. I certainly do not listen to music, because it eventually becomes artificial to me - I found it unfulfilling in the past, and even now I am wary of using music too much. I am unaccustomed to using friends or family as a means to "overcome hardships', but whether that is a matter of environment or psychological functioning, I cannot honestly say. However, there are a few people I feel comfortable discussing things with, and yes, it does feel better to talk to some people about some things.

    Finally, I would remember my connection to other people or organizations. Responsibilities I have. Focusing on them and less on myself has helped in that way.


    That is all for now. Perhaps more tomorrow morning.



    PS: no drugs/ intoxication - that does not work for me. Feels like I am running away. Going outside and doing something does help- makes me feel a bit more alive and real.


    more tomorrow
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  4. #4
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    When it comes to displays of emotional affection and warmth, do you see these things as being definitive of one's relationship to another? Or are those things more of the result of whatever relationship is there? How likely do you think it is for someone to lack warmth or emotional expression in dealing with someone they have a positive relationship with? If someone is acting like (s)he's not happy, should cheering them up/putting them in a better mood be a high priority for someone who cares about them? Or do you think that it's more important to understand what they're going through (if you can) and give them time to feel bad if they need to? How likely is it that there isn't even anything actually wrong in the first place when someone isn't acting like they're in a good mood?
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  5. #5
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    i'd like to answer this. when i'm really sad, i talk to my friends and get input. i listen to music and sing along to it. great soulful music sung by female singers with an alto/mezzo soprano voice ranges. i talk out loud to myself. i execute soul searches and get information that gives me a different perspective.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  6. #6
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,631
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    i'd like to answer this. when i'm really sad, i talk to my friends and get input. i listen to music and sing along to it. great soulful music sung by female singers with an alto/mezzo soprano voice ranges. i talk out loud to myself. i execute soul searches and get information that gives me a different perspective.
    same thing, i add dancing

    When it comes to displays of emotional affection and warmth, do you see these things as being definitive of one's relationship to another? Or are those things more of the result of whatever relationship is there? How likely do you think it is for someone to lack warmth or emotional expression in dealing with someone they have a positive relationship with? If someone is acting like (s)he's not happy, should cheering them up/putting them in a better mood be a high priority for someone who cares about them? Or do you think that it's more important to understand what they're going through (if you can) and give them time to feel bad if they need to? How likely is it that there isn't even anything actually wrong in the first place when someone isn't acting like they're in a good mood?
    1 - not really although at one point or another they have to be there, i suppose
    2 - coincident: if there's a relaitonship there's also the display, if there's no relationship there's no display, but you can have feeling without display
    3 - depends if they're working it's completely normal, if they're having sex it's really not that good
    4 - you understand what they're going thru and try to solve their problem(s) if you can; if they have to feel bad it's okay but of course you won't stop me from trying to make you feel better
    5 - it's rare to always be in a very good mood, i think?
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  7. #7
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    i'd like to answer this. when i'm really sad, i talk to my friends and get input. i listen to music and sing along to it. great soulful music sung by female singers with an alto/mezzo soprano voice ranges. i talk out loud to myself. i execute soul searches and get information that gives me a different perspective.
    same thing, i add dancing
    i would dance. but it'd be too scary. lol i'd look like elaine.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  8. #8
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,631
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    i'd like to answer this. when i'm really sad, i talk to my friends and get input. i listen to music and sing along to it. great soulful music sung by female singers with an alto/mezzo soprano voice ranges. i talk out loud to myself. i execute soul searches and get information that gives me a different perspective.
    same thing, i add dancing
    i would dance. but it'd be too scary. lol i'd look like elaine.
    feeling better > looking good
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  9. #9
    Blaze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    5,725
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by FDG
    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    i'd like to answer this. when i'm really sad, i talk to my friends and get input. i listen to music and sing along to it. great soulful music sung by female singers with an alto/mezzo soprano voice ranges. i talk out loud to myself. i execute soul searches and get information that gives me a different perspective.
    same thing, i add dancing
    i would dance. but it'd be too scary. lol i'd look like elaine.
    feeling better > looking good
    haha you are right i will dance in the privacy of my living room with the shades drawn...:-)

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

  10. #10
    eunice's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    TIM
    Ne-INFj
    Posts
    2,955
    Mentioned
    12 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    (Even though the question is specifically for UDP, I would like to answer it as well.)

    I would share my problems with my ISFj mother, or anyone who can understand them. I like it when people can just listen and offer constructive opinions to help me solve my problems. I hate it when they question my mistakes and make unnecessary criticisms eg. "why did you do that in the first place?", "if you hadn't done this in the first place, you wouldn't end up in such a plight". On the other hand, one ISFp friend once said something that really bothered me when I attempted to share my thoughts with her: "Eunice, you are too concerned about how the other person thought of you. What's most important is we are all having a good time." My experience told me that my ISFp, ENFp and ESTj friends were the worst people I can confide to. Why can't they tell me exactly how they feel?! I can't read their minds! I mean, I don't need them to always tell me to look at the bright side of life and sugarcoat their comments just because they think it will please me. I prefer them to be more direct and provide me with solid solutions to solve my problems.

  11. #11
    Joy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    TIM
    SEE-Se
    Posts
    24,501
    Mentioned
    58 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    like ESTps do?
    SEE-Se, 852 sx/so

    Check out my Socionics group! https://www.facebook.com/groups/1546362349012193/

  12. #12
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    Nothing makes me very very sad. If it did, all I would have to do is go back to my values and beliefs, which I have forged from the only thing(s) that seem capable of lasting.

    Also, no matter what possibly happened, I understand it could always be worse or better. And on the same note, there is always something more to be doing, rather than just relishing in your depression. Generally speaking, whatever happens, I just have to look at what the next objective is, what we are doing tomorrow, etc. I do not like lingering in moments, especially if it is a negative one.


    I do not really do anything. I certainly do not listen to music, because it eventually becomes artificial to me - I found it unfulfilling in the past, and even now I am wary of using music too much. I am unaccustomed to using friends or family as a means to "overcome hardships', but whether that is a matter of environment or psychological functioning, I cannot honestly say. However, there are a few people I feel comfortable discussing things with, and yes, it does feel better to talk to some people about some things.

    Finally, I would remember my connection to other people or organizations. Responsibilities I have. Focusing on them and less on myself has helped in that way.


    That is all for now. Perhaps more tomorrow morning.



    PS: no drugs/ intoxication - that does not work for me. Feels like I am running away. Going outside and doing something does help- makes me feel a bit more alive and real.


    more tomorrow

    The only other thing I can think of is what I told Joy in a pm: in retrospect from my college depression stage, having someone comfort me would not be appealing. This may be more an infantile|victim / caregiver|aggressor thing. It realized that I would feel better if I had someone who needed me to reassure them, or things to feel responsible about. Focusing on myself and needing someone to take care of me is only so appealing. I appreciate it, but I do not really think I am infantile. What helps is a sense of responsibility to other things, or other people.


    That is not very well written, because I wrote more and it was deleted or the window closed or something.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  13. #13
    Kristiina's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Estonia, Tartu
    Posts
    4,021
    Mentioned
    5 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    UDP sounds like positivist Fe-valuing judging from that post alone.

    Positivist: "Nothing makes me very very sad. If it did, all I would have to do is go back to my values and beliefs, which I have forged from the only thing(s) that seem capable of lasting."
    Fe-valuing: " I am unaccustomed to using friends or family as a means to "overcome hardships', but whether that is a matter of environment or psychological functioning, I cannot honestly say. However, there are a few people I feel comfortable discussing things with, and yes, it does feel better to talk to some people about some things." (confiding in others is obviously not your first choice of action)
    judging: "Generally speaking, whatever happens, I just have to look at what the next objective is..."

    That said, I don't think you are ISTj. Maybe duality is just too comfortable for me to spot, but I have never got the giddy feeling from you being matter-of-fact forceful in the forum. And I would suspect that creative Se would show quite fast.
    EIE, ENFj, intuitive subtype.
    E3 (probably 3w4)

    Cool ILI hubbys are better than LSIs any time!

    Old blog: http://firsttimeinusa.blogspot.com/
    New blog: http://having-a-kid.blogspot.com/

  14. #14
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Fe-valuing: " I am unaccustomed to using friends or family as a means to "overcome hardships', but whether that is a matter of environment or psychological functioning, I cannot honestly say. However, there are a few people I feel comfortable discussing things with, and yes, it does feel better to talk to some people about some things." (confiding in others is obviously not your first choice of action)
    How is that Fe or Fi?


    Positivist: "Nothing makes me very very sad. If it did, all I would have to do is go back to my values and beliefs, which I have forged from the only thing(s) that seem capable of lasting."
    Positivist?
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  15. #15
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    That said, I don't think you are ISTj. Maybe duality is just too comfortable for me to spot, but I have never got the giddy feeling from you being matter-of-fact forceful in the forum. And I would suspect that creative Se would show quite fast.
    If you are referring to that giddy feeling you mentioned when watching the "This is Sparta!" video clip, in regard to the king - you are right.


    I keep my explosions under wraps as much as possible, but when I do let go, it is to the same effect. I do not see how that is indicative of being Fe or Fi though
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  16. #16

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    USA.
    TIM
    INTj
    Posts
    4,497
    Mentioned
    4 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    i kinda felt like zillah gave me an istj feeling... I think creative Se is kinda spunky.

  17. #17
    redbaron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    9,321
    Mentioned
    16 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Expat
    Answer me this -- suppose something very very sad happened to you and left you depressed. Explain in some detail how you try to deal with it, if you do something to feel better. What usually does make you feel less down, if anything?
    I'll answer this too. Going for a walk. Writing down how I feel. Talking to a good friend. And yes I have been known to self medicate with coffee or alcohol. Not too much mind you but it doesn't take much.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

  18. #18
    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    5,983
    Mentioned
    80 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    -- not certain wether the info in here was correct, so deleted.

  19. #19
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington
    i kinda felt like zillah gave me an istj feeling... I think creative Se is kinda spunky.
    ''

    Comparing me to Zillah or Discojoe - no, I do not see much comparison. I do not think that makes me INTj however.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  20. #20
    Banned
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    TIM
    TiNe
    Posts
    7,967
    Mentioned
    11 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by UDP
    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington
    i kinda felt like zillah gave me an istj feeling... I think creative Se is kinda spunky.
    ''

    Comparing me to Zillah or Discojoe - no, I do not see much comparison. I do not think that makes me INTj however.
    I can't believe you don't know you're INTj.

    On the other hand, I'm not yet ready to present a exertion thesis.

  21. #21
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by tcaudilllg
    I can't believe you don't know you're INTj.

    On the other hand, I'm not yet ready to present a exertion thesis.
    What is that supposed to mean?
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  22. #22
    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Freiburg im Breisgau
    TIM
    ENTj
    Posts
    15,631
    Mentioned
    157 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington
    i kinda felt like zillah gave me an istj feeling... I think creative Se is kinda spunky.
    yeah she was the perfect example imho
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

  23. #23
    Ti centric krieger's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    5,983
    Mentioned
    80 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Reposting:

    See if you dislike creative Te use in INTp's and ISTp's... Te criticism of actions, eg. the unvoiced claim that you are being 'clumsy' feels hurtful to any Ti/Fe type.

  24. #24
    UDP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    East Coast West Coast Dirty South
    TIM
    LSE
    Posts
    14,826
    Mentioned
    33 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    No it does not really bother me much. So long as the criticisms are real, I generally appreciate them.
    Pre-2013 post are written with incomplete understanding.

  25. #25
    Don't forget the the thehotelambush's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    TIM
    LII
    Posts
    6,616
    Mentioned
    158 Post(s)
    Tagged
    0 Thread(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington
    i kinda felt like zillah gave me an istj feeling... I think creative Se is kinda spunky.
    Good way of putting it. That Youtube video of "TipToeChick" is another example of this, I think.

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=4LeaUI7lx2U

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •