To get along with me, I need you to --

[Expat]

Please tell me if you readily identify the most with any of those, as in "To get along with me, I need you to --"

They are based on the Enneagram, but a bit out of order.




A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.


B:

-Don’t clip my wings. I need as much freedom as the situation will allow.
-Lighten up and let’s have more fun together. Say something positive.
- Be patient if I’m not as structured or disciplined as you.


C:

-Appreciate all the special things I do for you. And give back. Ask me what I would like.
- When you must criticize me, be sensitive. I'm trying to do a good job to please you.
- Don't take advantage of my good will and support. I can burn-out trying to help.

D:

- Value and recognize my contribution, my specialness and gifts.
-Let me be me. And, remember, I need meaningful work to feel committed and alive.
- Be patient with my tendency to be "sensitive," and encourage me to do reality checks.


E:

- Do what you say you’re going to do, and do it right so I don't have to take it on or pick up
the slack and then get resentful. Also, be more helpful so I don't have to carry so much.
- Appreciate how hard I work and how good a job I do. Sometimes you resist me.
- Pay attention to the details. And be proactive looking to catch the mistakes so I don't have to.


F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space. I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.


G:

-Be clear & honest in communicating with me; ambiguity or any withholding drives me crazy.
-Don't take it personally when I play devil's advocate. I am great troubleshooter.
-Be patient and understanding when I overreact to problems because of my anxiety.



H:

- Be patient with my pace. I work best without constant monitoring and pressure tactics.
- If you must confront or get a commitment from me, an unpressured discussion will get results.
- Be sure you really have my attention if it's important. Remember, I need structure. Gently.


I:

-Notice what I do and achieve. Encourage me. Praise is the gas that makes my motor go.
-Keep up with me. Don't slow me down or get in the way. I don't like interruptions, being
diverted, or having to carry your load.
-And do a good job so it I can be proud of what we accomplish.

[Slacker]

B. I'll say B again because "B" alone isn't enough writing apparently to post.

[anndelise]

I can't answer one over the other...I'll highlight though the lines that fit me best:

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.
(clear communication is important to me as my mind has a natural tendency to pop up all sorts of possibilities as to what you mean, what you are referring to, why you are hemming-and-hawing, etc.)


B:

-Don’t clip my wings. I need as much freedom as the situation will allow.
-Lighten up and let’s have more fun together. Say something positive.
- Be patient if I’m not as structured or disciplined as you.
(the middle one fits as well, but not nearly as much as my need for freedom of movement...physical, mental, and emotional...nor as much as my need for clear communication)


C:

-Appreciate [s:2638ebf9f2]all[/s:2638ebf9f2] the special things I do for you. And give back. Ask me what I would like.
- When you must criticize me, be sensitive. I'm trying to do a good job to please you.
- Don't take advantage of my good will and support. I can burn-out trying to help.

D:

- Value and recognize my contribution, my specialness and gifts. (and have use for my abilities)
-Let me be me. And, remember, I need meaningful work to feel committed and alive.
- Be patient with my tendency to be "sensitive," and encourage me to do reality checks.
(I don't see how/why these last two are in the same sentence.)


E:

- Do what you say you’re going to do, and do it right so I don't have to take it on or pick up
the slack and then get resentful. Also, be more helpful so I don't have to carry so much.
- Appreciate how hard I work and how good a job I do. Sometimes you resist me.
- Pay attention to the details. And be proactive looking to catch the mistakes so I don't have to.
(with an added... but don't expect me to )


F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space. I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.


G:

-Be clear & honest in communicating with me; ambiguity or any withholding drives me crazy.
-Don't take it personally when I play devil's advocate. I am great troubleshooter.
-Be patient and understanding when I [s:2638ebf9f2]over [/s:2638ebf9f2]react to problems because of my [s:2638ebf9f2]anxiety[/s:2638ebf9f2]. mind popping up too many possibilities for me to sort through on-the-spot



H:

- Be patient with my pace. I work best without constant monitoring and pressure tactics.
- If you must confront or get a commitment from me, an unpressured discussion will get results.
- Be sure you really have my attention if it's important. Remember, I need structure. Gently.


I:

-Notice what I do and achieve. Encourage me. Praise is the gas that makes my motor go.
-Keep up with me. Don't slow me down or get in the way. I don't like interruptions, being
diverted, or having to carry your load. (because I divert and interrupt myself enough as is!!)
-And do a good job so it I can be proud of what we accomplish.

Basically, to get along with me, I need you to
Allow me my Freedom in movement, thought, emotion, and action.
Be Clear and Honest in your Communications...as well as be willing to Sincerely Communicate.
Have tons of Patience
Use my Talents/Abilities

[eunice]

Definitely C.

[Creepy-Diana]

.

[Khamelion]

As a group, I am between....

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.

F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space.<(Yes) [s:102004490c]I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.[/s:102004490c]<(Not at all)
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.

But random other ones fit too...doubt you want me to list every one.

I am critical of everyone, but I still can get along with most people I meet. Unless they just plain hate me, or they do something that deserves ignoring. I am selective about who I approach, but I'll talk to anyone who comes to talk to me...

....don't be rude(fine line when humor is involved). Don't be TOO over-bearing, for I can only take that in small doeses. I can enjoy a very wide variety of comanpy, just in certain doses.

[Exodus]

Relate somewhat to BCDFG, not at all to AEHI. The third part of B doesn't apply at all; C is too touchy-feely - it's how I act when I'm insecure; F is too businesslike. G is good, but it describes...nonessential qualities. Overall D fits best.

[cracka]

A.

[Quirk Satellite Div.]

I best identify with A,F, & G.

Am I supposed to pick my Enneagram type and wing?

[Expat]

I best identify with A,F, & G.

Am I supposed to pick my Enneagram type and wing?

In principle, if those phrases are any good, you should pick those describing your enneatype. I will write down the results shortly.

[niveK]

All of the above except D3, G3, and the definition for structure in H3 is a little too vague for me to make a decision on it in either direction. Rigid structure I'm going to dislike, but I do like a general framework from which I can work and improvise. D3 would fit without the "sensitive" bit. However, reality checks are quite useful. G3 fit when I was younger and actually overreacted to problems. Now I'm too "I don't give a fuck" to overreact to much, unless you count my neuroticism in relationships, in which case, patience is required.

So... All of the above, but D3, G3, and H3 conditionally.

[UDP]

The only one that generates a vigorous response is A, far and wide.

Only afters seeing what you wrote about this relating to Enneagram did I recognize my relation to F, which seems like the "Type 5". But still, A>F.

[UDP]

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.

I was doing some yard work this week with an ESFj, and I was "in the zone". I am not so sure how to describe it, but it is how I am when I work, when I "do" stuff. I was using my a lot with her: she was spending a lot of time trimming the branches off of shrubs, but our ultimate objective was to clear the field. She said "We have to cut the branches"

"No, not really. We just need a shovel." If you are uprooting a plant or shrub, it is irrelevant as to whether or not the branches are cut off from it.
Things kept going, and she kept trimming, and I realize we had not a shovel in the garage. I further implied that using a shovel would be more effective, and she sort of was offended, because I was telling her what she was doing was foolish, so to say.

It almost made me wonder about my duality with an ESE, because, they also do not tolerate superior tones, and although I was not really, my logic was clear. I wonder if an ENFj would have reacted more positively to the assertion. Eventually, she realized what I was doing, and we got a shovel from the neighbors.


In relation to the above quote however, it definitely struck a chord.

[Ezra]

8

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.

Completely.

5

F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space. I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.

Mostly, but for "I try to think things out very carefully".

6

G:

-Be clear & honest in communicating with me; ambiguity or any withholding drives me crazy.
-Don't take it personally when I play devil's advocate. I am great troubleshooter.
-Be patient and understanding when I overreact to problems because of my anxiety.

The first one.

[Mea]

Definitely B.

[FDG]

A and B equally

generally I don't even take into consideration the possibility that somebody can "clip my wings". I'll simply do what I want if he tries, and If he tries to limit me, I'll lash out until he leaves.

[Ezra]

A and B equally

generally I don't even take into consideration the possibility that somebody can "clip my wings". I'll simply do what I want if he tries, and If he tries to limit me, I'll lash out until he leaves.

Do you reckon 7w6s and 7w8s manifest their abhorrence for interference in their freedom in different ways?

While you hit out like an 8, my 7w6 brother would choose the more diplomatic route of verbally escaping limitations.

[Expat]

"A" the most.

Interesting, so you identify most with type 8. But I wonder if that was a good way of defining it. It's essentially a description of someone valueing .

B. I'll say B again because "B" alone isn't enough writing apparently to post.

That is type 7 which I think is your type, and fits the idea that 7 = EP.

[Expat]

I can't answer one over the other...I'll highlight though the lines that fit me best:

Since you often did not highlight the "core" of the type, you seemed to identify most with 6, then 7.

[Expat]

Definitely C.

Ok, that's type two which is in principle the caregiver

[Expat]

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.

E:

- Do what you say you’re going to do, and do it right so I don't have to take it on or pick up
the slack and then get resentful. Also, be more helpful so I don't have to carry so much.
- Appreciate how hard I work and how good a job I do. Sometimes you resist me.
- Pay attention to the details. And be proactive looking to catch the mistakes so I don't have to.


F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space. I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.


G:

-Be clear & honest in communicating with me; ambiguity or any withholding drives me crazy.
-Don't take it personally when I play devil's advocate. I am great troubleshooter.
-Be patient and understanding when I overreact (to whatever, nothing to do with anxiety though) to problems because of my anxiety.

You showed the most identification with 8, 5 and 6, but looking at it from the Socionics perspective, which you picked is and .

[Expat]

As a group, I am between....

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.

F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space.<(Yes) [s:5ab06dfa33]I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.[/s:5ab06dfa33]<(Not at all)
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.

But random other ones fit too...doubt you want me to list every one.

I am critical of everyone, but I still can get along with most people I meet. Unless they just plain hate me, or they do something that deserves ignoring. I am selective about who I approach, but I'll talk to anyone who comes to talk to me...

....don't be rude(fine line when humor is involved). Don't be TOO over-bearing, for I can only take that in small doeses. I can enjoy a very wide variety of comanpy, just in certain doses.

8 and 5 -- I begin to think that those phrases weren't well chosen.

[Expat]

Relate somewhat to BCDFG, not at all to AEHI. The third part of B doesn't apply at all; C is too touchy-feely - it's how I act when I'm insecure; F is too businesslike. G is good, but it describes...nonessential qualities. Overall D fits best.

D is type 4 --

A.

8, which makes little sense --

B, without a doubt. Nothing else really fits for me, at least that I can see.

7, which does make sense.

B is actually not an issue. Overcoming this sort of resistance is something I am good at.

You picked basically 2, 4 and 7, which makes sense imo.

[Khamelion]

As a group, I am between....

A:

- Be direct and honest with me. I don't care for playing games.
- Don't assume my assertive manner is an attack. It simply makes sense to me to be direct.
- When you disagree, tell me. When I'm wrong, tell me. If you have something helpful, tell me.

F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space.<(Yes) [s:823738c7e1]I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.[/s:823738c7e1]<(Not at all)
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.

But random other ones fit too...doubt you want me to list every one.

I am critical of everyone, but I still can get along with most people I meet. Unless they just plain hate me, or they do something that deserves ignoring. I am selective about who I approach, but I'll talk to anyone who comes to talk to me...

....don't be rude(fine line when humor is involved). Don't be TOO over-bearing, for I can only take that in small doeses. I can enjoy a very wide variety of comanpy, just in certain doses.

8 and 5 -- I begin to think that those phrases weren't well chosen.

Heh...

I suppose I don't mind games sometimes. I just have to be able to end them when I say so, or else I get annoyed and bored with the person I'm "playing" with. And I don't appreciate being dupped, or fooled into thinking someone is something they are not. I automatically take things at face value, and have to turn paranoid once I find out I'm being decieved. It is a result of being too trusting and thinking everyone is going to be genuine. To me, it is logical to be genuine, that is the easiest way, fastest way to find out if you get along with someone and to build a relationship.

I like honesty and helpful critisism. I like being direct but I don't always practice it. So when I decide to be direct, most people are taken aback and get upset in some way. So...A still fits...

And...F still fits minues the part I struck out. =\

Now...the only other two that have things the fit...

G:

-Be clear & honest in communicating with me; ambiguity or any withholding drives me crazy.
-Don't take it personally when I play devil's advocate. I am great troubleshooter.
-Be patient and understanding when I overreact to problems because of my anxiety. <(heh)

H:

- Be patient with my pace. I work best without constant monitoring and pressure tactics.
- If you must confront or get a commitment from me, an unpressured discussion will get results.<(meh im not that difficult)
- Be sure you really have my attention if it's important. Remember, I need structure. Gently. <(more like, invisible structure)

[XoX]

These jumped at me after reading them through once:
A > F >> G

I didn't analyze deeply at all not did I try to understand which correlates with what enneagram type. I tried to rely on my initial impression this time.

[Gilly]

G, B, A in that order.

[Blaze]

G > B > A

and no i made up my mind before i saw gilly's post lol.

[misutii]

Mostly D
D:

- Value and recognize my contribution, my specialness and gifts.
-Let me be me. And, remember, I need meaningful work to feel committed and alive.
- Be patient with my tendency to be "sensitive," and encourage me to do reality checks.



Some F
F:

-Respect my need for privacy and space. I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs.
-In working with me, have your facts ready and be objective, straight forward and succinct.
-Don't dismiss my analysis or ideas. I try to think things out very carefully.

[Gilly]

G > B > A

and no i made up my mind before i saw gilly's post lol.

[UDP]

"A" the most.

Interesting, so you identify most with type 8. But I wonder if that was a good way of defining it. It's essentially a description of someone valueing .

My first response, perhaps hidden at the end of page 1:

The only one that generates a vigorous response (<-- that should actually say "resonance") is A, far and wide.

Only after seeing what you wrote about this relating to Enneagram did I recognize my relation to F, which seems like the "Type 5". But still, A>F.

[eunice]

Definitely C.

Ok, that's type two which is in principle the caregiver

Hmmm...ok. I initially thought that we could only choose one option, and C was the one I identified with the most. I would have included D as my second choice as well. I chose C due to my preference for appreciation and recognition from people who I cared for, and my constant need of encouragement from people to assure me that I'm doing the right thing. Nothing encourages me more than others who paid attention to the kindness I have shown to them and in turn reciprocated it back.

[XoX]

These jumped at me after reading them through once:
A > F >> G

I didn't analyze deeply at all not did I try to understand which correlates with what enneagram type. I tried to rely on my initial impression this time.

I take it that A is 8? F is 5? G is 6? Perhaps this result could be interpreted as 5w6 who is trying to grow to 8? As I doubt I'm 8. 5w6 would be consistent with many of my past test results.

[UDP]

"A" the most.

Interesting, so you identify most with type 8. But I wonder if that was a good way of defining it. It's essentially a description of someone valuing .

Here's a more detailed description of me, for interest. (WARNING: it's a bit long.)

"A" the most, because I feel best with the "truth" (whatever that is), and want to be given objectivity so that I can make up my own mind about things. I don't like people sugar-coating things, for example, and I'm usually upfront and direct when I feel that I have something important to say. (That's why I love raw emotions, because they seem to complement my "serious"-type thoughts well.)

Yes for me, until here....

However, I do like a sense of naivete in the atmosphere around me. I'm definitely not extroverted. And I really like to debate ideas; but with some people I get the feeling that I have to tread carefully because they might misinterpret this debating attitude as a personal attack. Oh, another thing on the atmosphere ... even though I'm "serious" and calm, I usually automatically look for the humour in something, and can be pretty imaginative and tricky and "dreamy" (sort of).

B, D, F and G also had some relevant bits:

"B"
Lighten up and let's have more fun together. (I like debating, and finding meaning; but also a naive, fun atmosphere.)

All of that is fairly "no". I do see much humor in things (and will chuckle at circumstances, sometimes when no one else does), but I do not like a sense of naivete, nor do I ever suggest people lighten up and have fun. Only if their mood or attitude is so negative or defeated or serious that it gets in the way of working. I do not have a problem with an up beat atmosphere at work so long as it is effective.

"D"
Let me be me. (I definitely want my freedom and to not be inhibited.)
Be patient with my tendency to be "sensitive". (Yeah, I'm quite sensitive.)
(Regarding the other "D" points ... I want to contribute and to have meaning; but at the same time, I don't really care whether some other people value or recognize this or not, as long as I've been true to myself sort-of-thing.)

I have grown tired of people being sensitive to me. I will never be anyone else but who I am, and ScarlettLux is somewhat right when she says I am "self absorbed" - I am focused on the most important thing, and infrequently is that building a close relationship with other people. However, I am playing with ways to incorporate that more into my ideology.

"F"
Respect my need for privacy and space. I'm uncomfortable being engulfed with your needs. (I like my space and being independent, and I like others around me to be the same.)

Related to what I said above, about me being me.

"G"
Be clear and honest in communicating with me; ambiguity or any withholding drives me crazy. (Similar to "A" for me.)
Don't take it personally when I play devil's advocate. I am a great troubleshooter. (One of my debating styles.)

I do not play devils advocate, but then again I suppose I do. I use whatever means necessary to uncover the truth, even if it is painful. It is the pain of delusion more than anything else, but I accept the consequences of my actions.

[tcaudilllg]

I will never be anyone else but who I am, and ScarlettLux is somewhat right when she says I am "self absorbed" - I am focused on the most important thing, and infrequently is that building a close relationship with other people.

I use my awareness of the four psychic domains to exploit my natural relationship potential with dynamic potentialists to the fullest extent that I can justify as ethical, without worrying about "drawing them closer to me". As for people of the other domains, I just try to demonstrate I'm not a threat. Works well enough with "consensus building" dynamic kinetists and "servant" static kinetists, and even with the "belief guarding" static potentialists. With the others, not so well.

[rockclimber]

Definitely C.

Ok, that's type two which is in principle the caregiver

I relate best to C as well.

[Exodus]

Relate somewhat to BCDFG, not at all to AEHI. The third part of B doesn't apply at all; C is too touchy-feely - it's how I act when I'm insecure; F is too businesslike. G is good, but it describes...nonessential qualities. Overall D fits best.

D is type 4 --

I have considered 4, but does that make any sense? I'm starting to wonder if I really fit into any enneagram type.

[force my hand]

I > H > F

Has a key been posted yet? I may be blind...

[VatesSaeculum]

F and D mostly. B when I'm at my best.

[ScarlettLux]

The best fit I guess would be I

G & B fit alright too, so does D but not as well as the other three.

What Enneagram type is I?

[raisonpure]

B > I > A > D

What Enneagram type is I?

I think it's 3, The Achiever.