Here are some of the entries, in the order of the latest to the oldest. Gonna remove them after a while. He's not a friend, but I really enjoy reading his blog. It never fails to leave a smile on my face.
A mother's love
A few days ago, I got a glimpse of myself when I was 7 years old.
For those of you who know me...I love [name of shop]. Sometimes, I'll just go, for no reason, nothing to buy...just to walk around the store. Something about it brings me peace. The atmosphere, the smell? I dunno. But I'll go for a stroll there in the evening when I want to relax, usually I'll find something to buy. Maybe it's cause I used to work there...or maybe it's cause [name of shop] is just that cool...or maybe i'm just hella weird. (however, i do know many other ppl who do the same).
It seems as tho I write about [name of shop] often...I guess cause each time I go, I see something that makes me smile or wonder. Therefore, this particular trip, I had to take a moment to share with you.
4 days ago, during one of my "for no particular reason" visits, I was walking thru the toy section as I always do (as I have always done since I was a kid). Back then, my mom would be shopping and I'd run off and say..."I'll be in the toys". Then she'd usually find me there after she was finished, and by then I would have found countless things I wanted (usually Legos), and I'd make my case to my Mom as to why she should buy me a certain set. (It's nice being older now and being able to buy whatever legos i want whenever i want)
So I was in the Lego aisle...and there was a kid and his mom. They were Korean, but were speaking English. The boy was very eloquent with his words, describing the various reasons why the helicopter set was great. Now, what struck me the most endearing, was that the mom sincerely listened, and asked him "what about this other one, there's more pieces, so you can make more things". The kid, thinking he was so smart, of course said, "I always make different things than what the instructions say". But after a moment, he thought about it and asked his mother..."do you really think that the more pieces would be better?" That kind of trust and reliance caught my attention and made me grin. I had finished looking at the toys for sometime, but stayed (pretending to keep looking) just so i could hear more of their conversation. Something about her slight accent, and his childish innoncence made it more special.
The mom continued to help him find a suitable set, one that wasn't too expensive, but one that could also give him the most satisfaction and happiness, and he listened, and trusted her. I feel that as we grow up from kids to teens to young adults...we lose this trust in our parents, the people who love us the most in this world. Sadly, I know I am one.
Sometimes they started talking in Korean, so I couldn't understand, but after a few minutes (and taking these stalker photos ninja style) I left the aisle with a big smile on my face. Love can be found in so many forms...sometimes, just in finding the right Lego set.
The following picture is my favorite...Him brighteyed, making his case. Her listening intently and carefully
I left [name of shop] that afternoon not buying anything, but I surprisingly... I got exactly what I needed.
Thanks mom and dad, for giving in once in awhile and buying me a Lego set.The Death of the "Slow Jam"
Has anyone else noticed that nowadays, most slow songs are never about a person that the singer is actually with? It's always about a girl/guy who he/she misses, broke up with and thinks about still, is sorry to see leave, is sorry to break up with, etc... never about the guy/girl in the actual relationship.....is no one happy to actually be with their bf/gf to write a love song anymore? Seriously, think about it...what was the last good slow/love song you heard on the radio? Now...was it about missing someone or not being with them? Sad huh?
Is it that deep down, everyone just wants to go back to a past relationship? "The heart always wants what it can't have" right?
What do kids dance to at their proms now? I don't wanna dance w/ my date to a song saying "I still think about this other girl even tho I'm with you." or "I'm missing you, your'e not here w/ me". SHE IS THERE WITH ME! I wanna dance to a song that's about being happy and "in love" with the girl I'm with. sheesh. And I don't want the song to make her think of some other guy when she's dancing w/ me!!
Long gone are the days of "Cupid"s, "I Cherish You"s, "I can love you like that"s, "Say you'll stay"s, "Back at One"s, and "For you I will"s
Now is the days of..."You're gonna remember me", "I'm a murderer", "Never a right time to say goodbye"s, "Get me out of this circle"s,and "Let it burn"s
Not saying those are bad songs...but...I'd like to see some new love songs, real love songs, get popular again. I find myself listening to the same old ones. And yeah, there were sad breakup songs in the past too..but it was balanced. Now everyone's just singing the same thing...
And if there is a slow song about someone you're with...it's just about sex. When isn't love and relationships so much more than that?
Next time your'e listening to the radio, think about it...and you'll start noticing. If I'm wrong, please tell me so I can find a good love song....one that can be slow danced to. Don't be saying...Mary J. "Be w/out you" is one. Yes it's a great love song...but not a slooo jaaam. ya kno?
*edit* I'm talking about new songs. This entry is about how all the good slow songs are from the past...and none are from the last few yrs. I know all the songs from like, yrs ago (so don't send me those =P)...i'm talking about these days, now.Why I miss college, but know I shouldn't
People have been asking me a lot lately, how's life after school...
Well, here are my post college thoughts. everyone has them. I know that what i'm feeling isn't any different than what others have felt when they were going thru the same transition. These are just my thoughts; i'm not whining =P. However, you older people who are beyond this can enlighten me.
What follows is an excerpt (edited) from a journal entry i recently wrote.
"10.7.06
So, last weekend, I was in [name of state] to be a judge for [name of club] tryouts. It was the first time I was there since school started again. It never hit me before but this time when I went down and saw ppl again, walked on campus it felt pretty dang sucky.
Yes, college is over, and yes it sucks. But like I said, everyone has to deal with this. Everyone has their own dilemmas and feelings toward the end of their college years, facing the real world. This transition really sucks for some because their change in lifestyle is depressingly dramatic.
But, for me the transition hasn't been so bad. I'm still living away from home. I've been given the opportunity to pursue my dreams, doing something I love. I'm living w/ two great friends who are pursuing this dream with me. and I have a wonderful girlfriend/companion/friend.
So, though I helllaaaaa miss college and all the fun associated w/ it, everyone hasta move on. And if I hafta move on, it's pretty much the best thing I could ask for (realistically). So I can't really complain. So when people ask me how post-college life is? I tell them... honestly, I can't complain, because everything I have right now, is truly a blessing.
And truth is, I did what I could to live college to the fullest. So I should be thankful for what I got. I had the buddies, excitement, purpose, experiences, struggles, lessons and the things needed to make some of the most ideal college memories. There isn't a thing I would change. So maybe that's why I miss college so much. Cause it was everything I wanted (whether i knew it at the time or not).
Now, ripped away from it to begin something new. Though what I'm living right now, is not part of the college era but part of some other era. And though it's not the same as college, it's not supposed to be. It has to be different so that I can grow and move forward w/ my life. College happened, and it was amazing. Now, I'm starting something new that could potentially be even more amazing.
But for now it's good. It's ok that it's over and that things aren't the same. This is how we progress in life. Good things end, good things start. I'm at a start right now, I know it. =)"
The problem w/ being nostalgic is that I have a hard time living and enjoying the present. I'm working on that, especially when i have every reason to enjoy right nowww.
To everyone tho, from hs...from [name of college], bottom line...i miss you guys. See you when I see you (I don't get out much these days, lol). In the meantime, i wish you the best.
Oh, and if you wanna kno what i'm doing...check the [website] every so often (or ask me!). We work 10 hrs a day to keep this dream alive and deserve what is being provided to us.looking for the exceptions
it's a shame...
that time cannot stand still...that it passes so fast...even worse that it'll go even faster as i get older, right? it's a shame that good things have to end. Sometimes i wonder if it's better if they never happened in the first place, that way they don't have to have an ending. It's a shame that people so close to you at some moment or time in your life... are strangers now. You used to kno when they woke up everyday...now you don't kno anything about them. Then you wonder...who's next? It's a shame that so much of what ppl feel, or think, goes unsaid, and therefore unheard. Unheard usually by the ppl that need to hear it the most. So often what we really think or want, we never say, and it never even gets the chance to happen. It's a shame that there are really awful guys out there...like, really pathetically bad...even worse, my future gf or wife could be getting screwed over by one of them right now. It's a shame i didn't pay this parking ticket, when i had 30 days to...and now it's doubled... =P stoopid stoopednostalgia :: a curse and a blessing
I blinked, and 4 years passed...
The following is an excerpt from an actual journal entry from when i was an little 1st yr in my dorm room reflecting on the jump from hs and crap. If it doesn't make sense, just ignore it and think i'm hella weird...but I think a lotta ppl can feel me on this, they just might not say it...
11/3/02 Sunday
When did it get like this? How is it that I'm sitting right here, in front of this computer, on the 6th floor of [name of hall] at [name of college]. I don't really remember getting here. For some reason, it feels like I just happened here, everything else are just memories. Memories. That's it, that's all I have left. But I wish I had more. I'm not trying to be selfish, self centered. I'm just really, really nostalgic right now. As much as I look forward to the future, I long for the past. When things were simpler, and more fun. I don't want my childhood, even my high school years, to just be history. I wish I could have them forever. But I guess that's what sucks about time; one can only go forward, little by little but never back. That sucks. Because at the time in my life when I should be so friggin excited about going forward, all I wish for is going back. Now, all I want is one more day, one more afternoon
And now, as a little 4th yr, it's funny how much this still applies to whas going on now, as we're about graduate and embark on something EVEN more exciting (and scary). It's weird, knowing that this exact moment will be one we'll miss later on...but there's not much we can do, cause, time...passes. heh. oh well... I think we'll be fine....and one more thing.
...On another note. I really tire of hearing girls complain about how all guys are dicks and jerks and whatever. Usually, I have very litle sympathy, because they bring it upon themselves by dating obvious jackasses, but since they were the ones that gave them attention, the girls eat it up. I swear, it's actually like, 10 guys going around screwing the rest of us over. Girls just date these 10 guys, and come to a conclusion that all guys suck.
Ladies...guard your hearts. Don't give any guy the privelage to be w/ you. There are soooo many nice guys out there...stop falling for those same 10 guys. goodness.
Ladies just be more careful. Take ur time and have patience. Don't just snatch up the first boy who shows you an extra bit of attention. And to those certain boys... stop being stupid and selfish and douches... ur ruining it for the rest of us!!the real reason why i made a xanga
For a long time, I thought about making a xanga, but I never did, for certain reason I won't say to avoid offending anyone (heh, jk... kinda). So why did I finally break? Because I realized there was something that I HAD to share with the world so they could understand and share the same joy i feel... what is it that made me create a xanga, what is it that the world must know?!I find comfort in [name of shop]
I find comfort in taking trips to [name of shop]... And look at all the interesting things that happen...
So there was this old man that was working, at least 75, really skinny and wrinkly. We said hello to one another as i passed, but i think i observed him work for at least a few minutes. He went aisle to aisle straightening the products and stuff. I thought about, what he was like when he was younger and what he did back then. Now probably just working at [name of shop] cause he has free time. He looked misplaced, as if he should've been working in a small general store in the country, not just another [name of shop] employee in red and khaki. But the attention he was giving his duties was very admirable, made me ashamed at the way i used to work when i was at [name of shop] (back in senior yr). I think i woulda enjoyed working back then and done a better job, if he were my coworker.
So I'm in the toy section looking for some Legos (Dutch for "Play Well") or Nerf and i find...