What exactly is the subject?
Yes I relate, I find it very easy to relate too those of my own quadra. You can feel with them in the bitterness
because you yourself have been there
Talking about fi polr, If an ESTp revealed his most inner apple pie too a person then that person goes too an internet board and posts about it. And we all laugh heartly of it, does that hit his polr?
Well, the most illustrative example of ESTp's Fi-PoLR is my ESTp brother and ISFj mom. "Cute" is not the term I would use to describe this phenomenon, lol. It is funny, though, especially since my mom's Fi drives me up the wall.
Basically, my mom has these notions of ethical/social/moral "truth." Where they came from, I'll never know. They none of them make any logical sense to me, most come across as narrowmindedness, many are offensive, and she states them, not merely as opinion. They are unshakable truths beyond all debate:
- People with tattoos are evil.
- Everyone who doesn't follow a major religion (except Islam: see below) is evil.
- Hippies are evil.
- White people are evil.
- Black people are dangerous.
- Muslims are evil.
- Cats are evil.
- Smoking is evil.
- I am evil.
- It's wrong to object to anything your parents say. (She gasps audibly when I don't agree with her. )
- Sex is evil.
Now you can imagine the sort of conflict that develops whe my mom expresses these sorts of views and tries to impose them on the rest of the family. All of this she does with the same certainty and casualness one lends to the phase "It's rainng outside." My brother gets continually frustrated, arguing why what she's aying makes no sense. My mom gets continually frustrated, only instead of arguing shrugs off any logical basis for protestation, because he just doesn't understand these matters of fact. Things can get pretty loud sometimes... violent words from both sides.
I do get frustrated with ESTps sometimes because they will do things without thinking, and sometimes end up seriously hurting people and themselves. I guess that's what I'm here for... to make ethics make sense for them.
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
she's right about the cats thing. <3
6w5 sx
model Φ: -+0
sloan - rcuei
What I think is important is that the feeling is often mutual. Perhaps depends of the intertype relationship though? But anyway..
So if the feeling is mutual you just have to give that little extra and you will prevail! I think this works for most things, if you are not conscious of this it is just coincidence who gets the upper hand. In my experience it seems both parts give about the same amount of energy to the conflict. So in most cases you don't need new perspective, you just need to keep pushing forward! The enemy is just about to fall down too its knees!
HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa
HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa HaHaHaHa HaHaHaHa
I thougt that might be one thing we could agree on, but she also hated our family dog, my pet rats and hamsters, and my venus fly trap plant.Originally Posted by implied
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
LoL, she sounds like my mother, and I laugh in her face whenever I hear anything of the sort. You sure she's not an Fe type gone sour? It all sounds like bad Ti. I've never heard such narrow-minded stereotyping from INFjs or ISFjs, plus I don't get the urge to laugh in their faces because their words -- even their very presence -- have an immediate appeal to my conscience. IME this has been quite true:Originally Posted by Baby
I am also reminded of an argument between me and my mother:Introverted the feeling type also possesses property to be adapted to the life mainly with the help of a feeling, but expressed in the introverted form. To comprehend people of this type is very difficult. [Junga] in “psychological types” he indicates that saying “calm waters are deep” it relates precisely to this type of people. They possess the highly differentiated system of values, but outwardly it they do not demonstrate, it acts on them from within. There, where outstanding events occur, introverted the feeling type it is possible frequently to discover on the second plan, as if introverted a feeling prompts to it: “this is actually important”. Developing peculiar silent loyalty and nothing explaining, they appear in those places, where it is possible to become the witnesses of important and valuable internal events and arkhetipicheskuju of constellations. Furthermore, they usually have a secret positive effect on their environment, establishing the standards of behavior. And although, being introvert, they do not speak out aloud, people control them, and thus the installation of standards is carried out. Introverted the feeling types, for example, frequently form the ethical foundation of group, without irritating others by reading sermons and moral manuals, — they they possess the such exact standards of moral values, that from them proceeds the secret emanation, which has a positive effect on those surrounding. In their presence it is necessary to behave correctly, because they possess the authentic standards of values, which always suggest respect, which force others to be held worthily. Them that differentiated introverted a feeling determines, what factor is properly important.
Mother: You shouldn't take showers in the mornings. Anyone who showers in the morning is an idiot.
Me: Pfft, I can think of a few people who shower in the morning and aren't idiots.
Mother: Don't you dare argue with me!
Me: With all your untruths, it's taking every effort not to---
Mother *pours soup on me*
“I think, therefore I'll think" - Ayn Rand (ESTp, UR GUARDIAN ANGEL)
It might be weak Ne?Originally Posted by raisonpure
My ESFj mom is the same.
INTp
sx/sp
It's something that makes me go , but it isn't how PoLR manifests itself in my ISFj employer. Good question, actually... My ESTj teacher is also liable to such stereotyping, but not derogatory pronouncements.Originally Posted by Mea
“I think, therefore I'll think" - Ayn Rand (ESTp, UR GUARDIAN ANGEL)
Hmm... that would be interesting though - to see how each quadra deals with their porl, and look for a quadra trend.
Posts I wrote in the past contain less nuance.
If you're in this forum to learn something, be careful. Lots of misplaced toxicity.
~an extraverted consciousness is unable to believe in invisible forces.
~a certain mysterious power that may prove terribly fascinating to the extraverted man, for it touches his unconscious.
Herzy =D Well.. the only reason I called Fi PoLR cute is because it really makes me want to help them express themselves more and not be afraid.. cause I won't bite in regards to that PoLR. I want them to be comfortable enough around me to not be afraid to use/confront/talk about Fi
How can Te PoLR be cute .. or Si? Actually Si PoLR is extremely cute when I think about it LOL.. just the thought of the fashion combinations that some ENFjs come up with makes me inside. Hahahaha, oh, Freddie Mercury.. and being all clumsy & awkward with your surroundings.. bumping into things.. lmao.. do Beta STs find that "cute" ?
Te PoLR is more annoying to me than anything, but that's just because I have it.
I'm pretty sure she's ISFj. I don't get the urge to laugh in her face. There is an earnestness there and a very conscientious woman underneath all of that stereotyping. Also, she seems to respond well to Te but not Ti. Me and my brother have Ti in spades. It does nothing to change her mind. Only my dad and my third aunt (ENTj) seem to be able to get her to see past it. I actually DID think she was ESFj for the longest time, but intertype relationships would have been way off. Granted, I need a disclaimer here that my mom has had psychological problems (mild schizophrenia and manic depression) for as long as I've known her, which made her very difficult to type and contribute to her paranoia about the entire world being evil. She's a good woman and has toughed it out through some terrible times.Originally Posted by raisonpure
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
I feel for you. What part in particular do you see maternal similarities?
"How could we forget those ancient myths that stand at the beginning of all races, the myths about dragons that at the last moment are transformed into princesses? Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage. Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."
-- Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet
Shees, I'm lucky then. My mother's ISFj but she'd never say anything like that, except probably that drugs are bad, and that pets are high manteinance. However, she has never had psychological problems, so that might be the difference.
The Ne polr in many cases is about not believing in one's self and others abilities
Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit
Yes. Or at least not wanting to discuss that. A typical "painful subject".Originally Posted by FDG
, LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
Originally Posted by implied
Do people tend to devalue the quadras that value your own PoLR?
For example, I'm an LII. My PoLR is I'm an alpha but I identify with delta as a close second. For me, agreement on is more important than . In other words, I tend to devalue and have more difficultly relating to the quadras that value my PoLR function. For some weird reason, I identify more with gamma than beta even though gamma is my opposing quadra. Maybe because two of the gamma types share my NT preferences?
I know an ILE (PoLR ) who identifies best with alpha, then beta and not so good with delta. For him, agreement on is more important than . He has difficultly with the valuing quadras.
I also know an ILI (PoLR ) who identifies best with gamma and delta.
Is this just a coincidence, or do you think there is something to this?
Could subtype play a role here?
LII-Ne with strong EII tendencies, 6w7-9w1-3w4 so/sp/sx, INxP
I think it has more to do with your upbringing. I think betas are great, my sense of humor is slanted more towards them. Explaining it in terms of socionics, I would attribute it to the fact that I like more than I hate .
The saddest ESFj
...
Interesting.
I was thinking that Judicious/Decisive was which adjacent quadra you aligned more with. Though, to be fair, I don't need to be as guarded around Betas, even if I don't "get" them or resonate on any deep level.
EDIT
Judicious/Decisive divides the irrational complementary pairs; so it puts how you see the world into two camps. Ne/Si and Ni/Se.
Merry/Serious divides the rational complementary pairs; so it does the same for how you interact with other people. Fe doesn't mind being vulgar, that's all part of Fe being a communal, accumulating element (by virtue of being extraverted). Likewise, Te doesn't mind being direct (parallel for Merry types who might see Serious types as being quite rude, as I'm sure they feel quite the same about us ).
Thanks, fear of sleep!
I prefer Beta irrationals and Delta irrationals.
The end is nigh
Yea my relationships with betas are almost good enough to make me doubt my type. I had an SLE professor for Greek history and I loved the way he taught it. I got along with my dad (LSI) way better than I ever did with my mom (EII). I usually get along really well with LSEs at first, but I can't stand the way they joke around; I think they get way too personal. But then again I've had some really good EII and SLI friends too.
The saddest ESFj
...
Usually it has to do with if that function is leading or not. Supervisors and conflictors can be pretty bad relations altogether, even if you like their behavior, its really the inner conflict inside that isn't good that you somehow have tolerance for, those little things you don't bother with that can add up to a lot. Then usually super ego and comparative (creative is your PoLR) aren't as bad.
I think this makes a good deal of sense, both theoretically and in my own experience. The PolR represents the most sensitive of all the functions, so an atmosphere which tends to over-emphasize that particular aspect of the information elements would no-doubt be more stressful Socionically than one that does not. That isn't to say one cannot _enjoy_ these environments, because there are still aspects within them that the individual values, but by and large I think they are more intimidating and stressful than one's other neighboring quadra.
"To become is just like falling asleep. You never know exactly when it happens, the transition, the magic, and you think, if you could only recall that exact moment of crossing the line then you would understand everything; you would see it all"
"Angels dancing on the head of a pin dissolve into nothingness at the bedside of a dying child."
Really for me its about temperament.
I like/get along with Ep's and Ip's from any quadra really, although obviously I find the most in common/similar world view/ease of communication with Alpha p's followed by Beta/Delta p's followed by Gamma p's
The types that get on my nerves are Te/Fi valuing rationals. ENTj's, ISFj's, ESTj's, and INFj's.
The end is nigh
I often identify the most with Fps, in general. Then most Introverts, in general. I usually relate very little to most EXTxs and EXFjs. But I think that these sort of things often go beyond types.
Psychologically I often feel the closest to most ESFps, ENFjs and INFps...
I value Deltas because they're stable and I'm one. I value Gammas because they value , which is my base and is obviously valuable. I value Alphas because they value , which is a lot of fun to be around. I value Betas because...they're people.
I think it's more about not valuing your valued functions than about valuing your polr.