All right, here it is, my definitive answer. I've looked over the functions long enough. Do not question or try to figure out the logic of what functions I give. This is what I recognise myself as, and this is what I am. I don't want to hear "you express ENFj sentiments" or "you're most like ESTp so you can't be that" or "well that's funny because nothing at all has implied that so far" - what I say is the honest truth. This is the type I am.
I am...
Followed by...
It makes perfect sense to me, more to me than any other type does. It clicks. Since Socionics is developed from Jung's theory (and thus carries most - if not all - of its principles), I know I'm not Sensing. I can explain to you why not if you are burning to know, but - to be honest - I think it's unnecessary. And I'm definitely Extroverted Thinking. Hence, Rationality follows naturally.
Thank you to all those who persuaded me to persist in broadening the depth of my knowledge of Socionics, whether in a cold, insulting manner, or in good faith.