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Thread: Which intertype relations are the most competitive

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    Default Which intertype relations are the most competitive

    Bear with me if this is an obvious question. Which relationships would have the most competition? Those with whom you share your creative function? If that's the case then it would be your identical and your look-a-like? Any others, or do I have it wrong?
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Hot Message FDG's Avatar
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    Identicals
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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    So there's this friend of mine from college and we recently reconnected by email--she's kind of intense, I don't *think* she's INFp but I have no idea. (I should try to write up a thing about her under types and see what you guys think) but for some reason, we cannot talk for more than a few messages back and forth without this intense rivalry happening. It's really weird. I LIKE her, I really do, we have so many similarities but it seems like I'm always striking her the wrong way or something and then it's off to the races. This happened in college too but I chalked it up to immaturity. I can't believe it's still happening. Must be a personality thing. But now I'm curious as to her type.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    from toronto with love ScarlettLux's Avatar
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    Personally.. I think Contrary


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    redbaron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ScarlettLux
    Personally.. I think Contrary
    You know...I just read the description (it would be ENFp) and it does fit her pretty well. Well that explains it I guess. So then I went and read the Contrary description. Whoa. Describes almost exactly our interaction. That is seriously wild. Especially the bold parts:

    Both partners experience difficulties in establishing and keeping a stable psychological distance between them. The only chance Contrary partners have to get on together well with each other is if they are left alone. In other cases partners usually compete over their strong sides. The reason for this is when somebody else is present, each partner tries to capture the attention of the listener by showing off their strong side. Contrary partners may like some elements of the other partner's behaviour. This often helps the partners to begin a more close relationship. However, when they are in company, their interaction can change dramatically. The introvert partner usually becomes distant, relations lose warm feelings and become formal and cautious. Both partners may start regretting that they became too trustful.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    Yeah I think I've most often felt competition with INFps. For people's attention anyway. I don't think I'm generally competitive though.
    It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
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    Thing is, we were nearly best friends in college for two or three years. We were even roommates (in the same room!!) for a year and that was when things really disintegrated. I just got fed up with her need for attention from everyone including me. I think we were in competition not so much for other people's attention as we were for each other's attention. I was tired of her angsting and drained of the attention she demanded. She's a very demanding individual. I could put up with it (it even amused me) in smaller doses but living together put me over the edge. The strange thing is, though, that even now when we are only communicating via email, it's obvious to me that we still have these roadblocks. I would be seriously baffled if it weren't for the socionic explanation that helps to clarify why this is. I would really like to be friends with her but it becomes this whole "my problems are more difficult than yours" thing and "you really must pay attention to my issues, they are more important" which is the way it's always been with her. To make matters worse, we're both artists so throw that in there and there's yet another thing to be competitive over. I like her, I really do. I respect her and WANT to be friends with her. That's the frustrating thing.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    implied's Avatar
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    contrary or quasi imo.
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    Default Re: Competition

    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron
    Bear with me if this is an obvious question. Which relationships would have the most competition? Those with whom you share your creative function? If that's the case then it would be your identical and your look-a-like? Any others, or do I have it wrong?
    i'm with you redbaron. i think with identicals and comparatives the competition would surface right away. with lookalike's it emerges over time.

    with quasi's and contrary's it's more like friction not competition.

    ILE

    those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often

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    Default Re: Competition

    Quote Originally Posted by diamond8
    Quote Originally Posted by redbaron
    Bear with me if this is an obvious question. Which relationships would have the most competition? Those with whom you share your creative function? If that's the case then it would be your identical and your look-a-like? Any others, or do I have it wrong?
    i'm with you redbaron. i think with identicals and comparatives the competition would surface right away. with lookalike's it emerges over time.

    with quasi's and contrary's it's more like friction not competition.
    Perfect.

    Except you forgot Mirrors.

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    le petit prince raisonpure's Avatar
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    Identicals: I can't help but feel disgusted when I see a female clone who has the same eyes, same mouth, and same mannerisms as mine.

    Activity/Beneficiary. I made a lot of progress because the rivalry with my ISTj/INTj study partner was so intense. I preferred to stay away from her for the same reason. I get the urge to dispatch an ISTj dude from time to time because it feels like he's stealing my terrirory. Plus I can tell if he likes someone that I like, and that is my natural reaction to competitors for the attention of someone I consider to be mine

    Maybe also Contrary.
    “I think, therefore I'll think" - Ayn Rand (ESTp, UR GUARDIAN ANGEL)

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    Err. Competition? What do you mean by competition? What kind?
    INTp
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    on some socionics sites it says that comparatives are the ones who have problems if one is more successful in some way than the other. It makes sense if you think about it: having the same base function and devaluing the way the other person works towards it. A success of someone who is using your devalued function and who devalues your valued function could seem like it could provoke one to react in a way that says, "look my valued function is better".

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    redbaron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mea
    Err. Competition? What do you mean by competition? What kind?
    I guess I meant competition in general, whether it be feeling jealous of what the other has accomplished and pushing yourself to do better than they, or negative competition such as "my day was worse than yours, let me prove it", a sort of one-upsmanship thing. Or could be competition for attention from others, competition for friendships with other people, etc.
    IEI-Fe 4w3

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    I think it would be identicals and look-a-likes especially when they are a more successful and cooler version of you.

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    Also ex boyfriends of a girl you are dating, non socionically speaking.
    Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit

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